DISCLAIMER: As always, I do not own any of the Walker, Texas Ranger characters in this story, nor is any ownership implied. Just taking them out to play, or for some of them in the case of this story, a pretty rough romp in the mud. Also, I do not claim ownership of the lyrics to "Everywhere." Those belong to Tim McGraw. I just love the song and borrowed a few lyrics for a moment as they were the inspiration for this story.

Gage drove the orange Chevelle down the dusty road toward the Walkers' ranch. Walker and Alex had invited him, Trivette and Erika and their newborn twins, and a few other friends over for a cookout. Normally, Gage loved these get-togethers on warm, sunny Texas afternoons, but he had a bad feeling about this one. He just knew Alex was back up to her match-making ways and he was not in the mood for it today. He knew she meant well – she always did – but Gage still wasn't ready to meet anyone yet. It was just too hard, too much for his heart to take.

You're just chickenshit.

That voice was back. The voice that hid in the depths of his mind and only came out to play and taunt and torment and then say it was trying to be helpful. Call it his conscience, the voice of reason, or the devil's advocate, it always seemed to surface and point out the truth, usually at a time when Gage least wanted to hear it. If he was brutally honest with himself – which he tried not to be these days – the voice sounded an awful lot like her, which only irritated him further. He wasn't in the mood for The Dating Game today and he certainly wasn't in the mood for hearing voices like a crazy person.

How difficult would it be to just go out on one date? Really, now.

Gage turned up the radio to drown out the voice. Tom Petty faded out; the deejay talked a bit about an upcoming concert and played back a call with someone who had won tickets in a phone contest. After a couple commercials from a local car dealership and a furniture store having a going out of business sale, Gage got annoyed and changed the station, fiddling with the radio dial until he tuned in a country station. He turned up the volume to hear Tim McGraw singing,

But ever since you said good bye
I've been out here on the wind
And baby you would be surprised
All the places you have been
I've seen you in

Albuquerque
Waitin' out a blizzard
Arizona
Dancin' 'cross the desert
Watchin' the sun set in Monterey
Girl I swear just the other day you were
Down in Georgia
Pickin' them peaches
In Carolina
Barefoot on the beaches
No matter where you choose to be
In my heart I'll always see you

Everywhere

"Damn it," Gage growled to nobody in particular. He shut the radio off. Truth was, he did still see her everywhere. He imagined seeing her walking in the door at work or turning the corner around a building walking down a street. Sitting at a table at CD's. No matter where he went, he always thought he caught a glimpse of her somewhere. Some days it was comforting, like she'd never left. Other days, it was maddening. All he knew was that he missed her so much that his soul hurt. It had been five years, five years to the day, actually, since she left. Five years since the worst day of his life. No wonder he had such a bad feeling about today. And Tim McGraw, with his perfect life and his perfect wife had to go and sing a song to remind him of it. "Fuck you, McGraw," Gage thought, slamming his hand against the steering wheel as he fought back the tears. Five years ago his life could have been perfect, too, had it not been for stubborn pride and a stubborn woman.

"I think that's everything," Alex said as she dried her hands on a dish towel. "Now we can get to the good stuff." She took two wine glasses out of the cupboard and motioned toward the refrigerator.

"There's a couple bottles in there, pick what you think looks good."

Sydney Cooke-Weatherton chose a bottle and opened it with the corkscrew her friend offered her. She poured a glass for each of them and joined Alex at the kitchen table.

"So, do you think he'll be here?" Sydney asked nervously.

"He said he was coming," Alex replied, taking a sip of wine.

"Alone? Or with someone?" Sydney could feel her stomach tying itself in knots. Five years, she thought. So much had happened in those five years. She wasn't quite sure she wanted to relive all those moments, but she was going to have to at least look at the highlight reel at some point.

"Alone as far as I know. He isn't dating anyone, at least nobody he's told Walker or me about."

Sydney didn't know if that made her feel relieved or not. Facing Gage after all this time was going to be tough either way. Better to get it over with today, especially since she had moved back to Dallas.

"So, fill me in on everything I missed. Jimmy and Erika have twins? I can't wait to see them! And Angela has grown up so much, I can't believe it," Sydney gushed, hoping to find out more about what Gage had been up to since she'd left.

"Well, Jimmy and Erika should be here any second. Their babies are adorable! Jamie and Jade. Oh my goodness, Sydney, you can't imagine how precious they are! Angela just loves Pre-K, and she's just a little social butterfly –"

"Just like her mama! What's happening at Ranger Headquarters? I heard Walker is up for Captain Briscoe's job?" Sydney ran a finger around the rim of her wine glass, trying to act and sound casual.

"Yes, he is. Captain Briscoe is retiring in about a month and Walker is on the short list for his job. Bobbie Hunt, did you know her? She'll be here later after her daughter's softball game. She took your spot when you left, but she wants to transfer to Lubbock. She has family there and it'll be easier with her daughter."

Alex continued on, but Sydney didn't hear anything. All she heard was that Company B was about to have an opening and she needed a job.

Gage didn't recognize the blue Jeep Wrangler parked in front of Walker and Alex's house. He parked next to it and got out, calling out a hello to Walker who was tending the grill. Walker waved him over.

"Glad you could make it, Gage. I made sure to have some extra burgers on hand for you." Gage was famous for two things, his inability to be on time for anything and his love of food.

"Thanks, Walker. Those burgers do look good. Hey, whose Jeep is that?"

A sheepish grin crossed Walker's lips. Gage rubbed his forehead, feeling the headache start already. "Damn! She did it again, didn't she? Damn it, Walker. I told her I don't want fixed up with anyone. Will you please explain to your wife I am perfectly happy being single?"

"Easy, Gage. You know Alex means well, and you know it makes her happy to try to fix people up."

"Well, it doesn't make me happy," Gage huffed.

"I'll talk to her. But just try to relax and enjoy the day, okay?" Walker asked, handing the blond ranger a beer from the nearby cooler.

"I guess." Gage looked sullen as he twisted the top off the bottle of Lone Star and took a long swig. "Alex in the kitchen? I should at least go stick my head in the door and say hello."

Gage was almost to the porch steps when Alex stepped out onto the front porch, a basket of hamburger buns in her hand. As she welcomed Gage with a warm hello and hug, Angela darted out the door behind her, running up to Gage and throwing her arms around his waist in a miniaturized bear-hug. Gage bent to scoop her up in one arm.

"Uncle Gage! You're here! Mama has a surprise for you!"

"She does, huh?" Gage glared at Alex.

"Yes, I do," Alex replied with a smile. "I baked your favorite chocolate cake! Connie Jensen gave me the recipe since she couldn't make it today. In fact, I baked two. One for dessert and one for you to take home."

"Well, that's some surprise, don't you think, Squirt?" Gage kissed Angela on the forehead and set her back down on the porch.

"But Uncle Gage, that's not –"

"Angela, why don't you take these buns over to Daddy so he can toast them," Alex handed Angela the basket of hamburger buns and sent the overall-clad blond child on her way.

"So, who is she, Alex?" Gage asked pointedly, swallowing the last of his beer.

"Gage –"

"Whoever's driving the Jeep. Who are you trying to fix me up with this time, even though I've told you not to?"

"Gage, honestly, I didn't plan this. But I couldn't exactly say no."

"Say no to what? What are you talking about?"

At that moment, the screen door creaked open behind Alex.

"I think she's talking about me."

Sydney stepped out onto the porch. Five years later and she still looked the same as the day she left. Well, almost the same. She'd done something different with her hair, but she was still the same beautiful Sydney that had left him five years ago, pissed-off and with his heart in a million pieces. Gage felt his heart rise into his throat and his chest constrict. The empty beer bottle in his hand fell to the porch floor with a dull thud, but he made no move to retrieve it.

Holy shit. You weren't expecting that, now, were you?

"I'm sure you two have a lot of catching up to do," Alex said, bending to pick up the bottle as she turned to walk back into the house. "'I'll just start putting the food out."

Gage barely heard her. He barely knew where he was, for that matter. All he knew was that the completely familiar, yet somehow total stranger in front of him in that gauzy black dress, denim jacket, and turquoise blue cowboy boots was his former partner and he didn't know whether he should slap her or embrace her.

"Hey," Sydney said shyly after what felt like an eternity. "Since when have you ever been so quiet?"

"Probably since you got the hell out of Dodge about five years ago," Gage fought to look away. The longer he looked at her the more he felt those old feelings begin to stir and he wasn't about to let his heart go again. "Just what the hell brings you back to this side of Texas?"

"That's a long, complicated story," Sydney replied wistfully, toying with the silver bracelets around her wrist.

"Well, when are you leaving this time?" Gage growled

"I'm not. I'm back to stay."

Gage felt his temples begin to throb. He needed another beer. "Really, now. How nice. I suppose Mr. Wonderful is here, too?"

Sydney flinched. She hadn't expected Gage to roll out the red carpet for her, but she didn't expect him to be so cold. "I told you, it's complicated."

"I don't get what the hell is so complicated about happily ever after and 'til death do us part and all that happy crap," Gage snarled.

"Gage – " Sydney began. A silver SUV pulled in behind Gage's Chevelle, sounding the horn. Trivette stepped out from the driver's side.

"Sydney Cooke! I don't believe it!" Trivette called across the yard.

Sydney waved and bounced down the porch steps past Gage to greet her former co-worker with a hug. Their happy voices and laughter pierced at Gage's temples and made his headache even worse. He stepped off the porch and went to look for that cooler of beer, Sydney's voice ringing across the yard as she and Trivette caught up.

"Since when do you drive a mom-mobile?" Sydney laughed.

"This is Erika's," Trivette said of the full-size SUV. "I still have my Mustang, but it won't fit two car seats and all the baby gear."

"I heard you have twins now, that has to be an adventure!"

Erika rounded the front of the SUV toting a baby carrier, a large diaper bag slung over her shoulder. At the sight of each other, she and Sydney both squealed delightedly. In the carrier, the tiny baby woke with a cry.

"Well, so much for a happy, sleeping baby girl!" Erika laughed. "Jimmy, do you want to get Jamie out of the back?"

Sydney rushed over to greet her friend with a hug and to fuss over the tiny baby girl in the carrier seat. "Oh my goodness, Erika, she's gorgeous!"

"Gorgeous? Look at you!" Erika gushed. "Your hair! It's amazing!" Sydney twirled around so Erika could see the full effect. Sydney had cut her long dark hair into a chin-length bob and added wispy bangs.

"You look beautiful," Erika smiled approvingly at her friend and hugged her warmly. "I have missed you so much!"

"And I've missed you, too! I can't believe I didn't know about the twins. I have missed so much around here." Sydney cooed over the baby boy in the carrier Trivette brought from the SUV. "You would never know you had twins – you look stunning," she hugged Erika again, "motherhood definitely agrees with you."

"Yeah, it agrees with everything but my sleep schedule," Trivette quipped. "I haven't had a full night's sleep since they arrived. I've been told I won't have a full night's sleep until they leave home, either. But you know what? We wouldn't trade a single second of it." He wrapped an arm around Erika's shoulders and kissed her cheek. Sydney smiled warmly at her friends. It was good to see them so happy.

Gage watched the scene from across the yard as he downed another beer. The pain in his head was slowly starting to ease up. Walker joined him and clapped him on the shoulder. "I'm sorry, Gage. I should have told you she was here, but Alex was so sure you'd be happy to see her and she wanted it to be a surprise. I guess that old wound just never healed, did it?"

"Yeah, well, that's what happens when you try to put a Band-Aid over a bullet hole, I guess," Gage finished off the beer. "She's acting like nothing ever happened."

"Or maybe she's just trying to make the best of the situation. Coming back here probably wasn't easy," Walker reasoned.

"Could've fooled me and everyone else," Gage growled. "Those burgers done yet?"

Later in the evening, after Jimmy and Erika had left to get their babies to bed and the rest of the guests had slowly drifted home, Alex and Sydney were cleaning up in the kitchen and Walker excused himself to go to the barn to feed the horses. Gage grabbed another beer from the cooler and walked along the white board fence lining the pasture. He stopped and leaned against the fence, tilted the longneck to his lips and watched the fading sunset tip the pasture grass with shades of gold and orange.

Why'd she come back, he wondered to himself. He spent the afternoon trying to avoid her. Every now and then, she caught him looking at her and she'd smile. As much as he hated to admit it, that smile still melted him inside. She was still so beautiful. She seemed happy on the outside; laughing and talking with everyone, but even after five years he knew his partner - his ex-partner – and he could tell something wasn't right. She wasn't wearing her wedding ring, or that ridiculously huge piece of ice she called an engagement ring, either. Gage wondered what the story was behind that. He also noticed that she seemed to go out of the way to avoid holding Trivette and Erika's babies. That struck him as really strange. When Walker and Alex brought Angela home, he had to all but pry that baby out of Syd's arms; and any time they did anything for the HOPE Center, it was pretty much a guarantee that Syd would be running around with a baby on her hip, fussing and cooing and playing with the little ones like they were her own. Today, though, he didn't see her once holding either of those twin babies or even fussing much over them and that was not the Sydney he knew. Something was definitely wrong.

You could just ask her and get it over with.

He could ask her, but he had no intention of going there. Not today. Not yet, if ever. Asking would mean caring, and caring upped the likelihood of getting his heart ripped out again. If she wanted him to know what she was doing back in Dallas, she'd tell him, if he gave her the chance, and he wasn't even sure he wanted to do that. Just like he and Walker talked about, when you put a Band-Aid on a bullet hole, it doesn't take much for the old wound to open up again.

"Hey."

The voice behind him pulled Gage from his thoughts and he jumped. He turned to find Sydney standing behind him.

"Mind if I join you?" she held up two bottles of beer.

"I'm not planning on being a brilliant conversationalist, but suit yourself." Gage finished off the beer in his hand and took the one Sydney offered him, twisting off the top and taking a long drink.

"Gage, I'm sorry. I should have called to tell you I was coming back to Dallas."

"Why? It wouldn't have made any difference." Gage refused to look at her. When Sydney placed her hand on his arm, he jerked away.

"I wish you'd listen to me, let me explain," Sydney said, almost pleading.

"Yeah, well, I wish you'd understand my side of this, too," Gage's voice rose in frustration. How could she not understand what she did to him when she left him five years ago? Finally, when he turned to look at her, the coldness in his eyes shocked Sydney. In all the time she'd known Gage, she'd never seen him look that way.

"Okay, I'm listening," she spoke softly. "Help me to understand. I want to understand."

Jesus. Why did she always have to do that? Saint damned Sydney, Gage thought. He wanted her to understand the hell she put him through, but he still wanted to wallow in his pain. The pain that had been his constant companion for the five years she was gone. The pain that had become his defense against the world. The pain that had helped him to rebuild what was left of his shattered heart and wrap it in razor wire to keep anyone else from getting as close as he'd let Sydney get to him.

Oh, you mean the pain you married when she left?

"It was five years ago today that you left, Syd. That was the worst damned day of my life. I don't know what was harder to take – your deciding we were over or your deciding you didn't even want to be partners with me at work anymore. You weren't even willing to let me try. What was it, Syd, wasn't I worth trying for? Weren't we worth trying for? All I wanted was some time. Just some goddamn time to wrap my head around everything and try to figure out how to fix things with us and I wasn't even worth that to you. Do you understand how that made me feel? You couldn't even tell me goodbye in person. All I got was your damn note. I loved you Syd. I loved you so much and you ripped my fucking heart out when you left."

Gage saw Sydney flinch and inch backwards away from him. He had hurt her. Good. He wanted her to hurt as badly as she had hurt him.

"Gage, you couldn't even meet me halfway. There was no middle ground with you," Sydney countered.

"Why was I the one that had to meet you halfway? Why couldn't you meet me?" The pounding in Gage's head was back. He was going to need something stronger than Lone Star if she was going to insist on hashing this out tonight.

"Because you weren't the one who was being asked to give up your whole career." Sydney fired back, her dark eyes flashing in fury. "You know, Gage, you weren't the only one whose heart was broken. You were the one who decided we needed time apart. Not me."

"Yeah? If you were so heartbroken, why'd you move on to Mr. Wonderful so fast? You practically ran down that aisle. Nobody saw me getting married. And speaking of careers, where's your career now?" Gage's voice was full of venom. "Was it Mr. Wonderful's money or good looks that made giving up your career so easy? And what about your kid? Is Mr. Wonderful home playing Mr. Mom while you're moving back to Dallas?"

BOOM. Let her explain that one.

Gage saw the rage building in Sydney's dark eyes. She opened her mouth to say something but nothing came out. Sydney looked down at the beer bottle in her hand and, in a moment that surprised them both, threw it at Gage's head. He ducked, but felt the wind from it as it sailed by his ear. Five years certainly hadn't dulled her fire, that was for sure. She turned on her heel and started away, but turned back to him. Grabbing hold of Gage's shirt, she pulled him down to her level so they were eye to eye.

"You have no idea, Francis Gage. No idea. And you're a mean, rotten drunk."

Shoving him away, Sydney turned and stormed off.

Well, damn, son. I'd say she's a bit pissed.