Rating: T (mild language)

Spoilers: None

Disclaimers: If you lived here, you'd be home by now. I read that on a billboard sign once – I don't own that slogan any more than I own these characters.

Author's Note: Written in response to the Unbound Challenge from 31 Jul 2005.

Snuffed

by Lapsus Stili

"Are you planning to sit and brood all day?"

Grissom was startled from his deep thoughts, drawn back to the present by a lovely voice he would know anywhere. Her voice. Coming from her lovely lips as she leaned against his doorframe on her lovely shoulder. Today though, her presence did not evoke in him its usual stirrings of quiet pleasure.

"I'm not 'brooding', Sara, I'm thinking," he said softly, scratching absently at his beard.

"Ok then…are you planning to sit and 'think' all day…with that scowl on your face in that slouched position holed away here in your office where you've been since our disagreement earlier?"

A narrowing of eyes and a slight huff were her only indications that he had heard her. Still, when the left corner of his mouth twitched upwards, just a smidge, she knew she had gotten her point across.

"You call it a disagreement, I call it borderline subordination, Missy."

"Wha….? I was merely pointing out that you were pairing me with Greg again when he clearly could've handled that smash n' grab case on his own. Don't you trust him by now, or is it that you can't stand the thought of working with me at all anymore?"

Up went the man's left eyebrow, down went his lower jaw. After a deep breath, "Firstly, you didn't 'merely' do anything...you rarely do. You actually slammed your mug onto the counter hard enough that you chipped it, then glared at me as though I had just called you a street walker, and in front of both Greg AND the new receptionist, you called me an asshole!" he finished with a stern wagging of his finger in her general direction.

Before Grissom could address the rest of her points, Sara took her own turn at looking flabbergasted. "I never said that!"

The volume in his office was growing steadily now. "Perhaps not out loud, but I could read your lips as plain as black and white, and even without ever having spent a day in the deaf community, I'm sure our two witnesses had no trouble deciphering your little rant. How do you think that makes me feel, Sara?"

"Feel? FEEL?" Oh, she could feel alright…she could feel the burning heat washing up her face as she was overcome with exasperation. Unconsciously balling her hands up at her sides, Sara finally unleashed her frustrations. "How the HELL could I possibly know how you FEEL, Grissom? When have you ever given me ANY clear indication of how you FEEL about anything!"

"Oh, as opposed to YOU?" he roared. "I guess I should just let my emotions run my entire life like you, huh? Just hang it all out there like laundry on the line!" His arms were thrown up in mock surrender at this point as he rose from his chair, sending it clattering into the shelving behind him. "Hell, EVERYONE knows how Sara feels…whether we want to or not, isn't that right?" he sneered loudly at the end.

The intense pressure behind his eyes was building further. This one was going to be a real doozie. Experience told him that he'd be going home to a 'dinner' of 40mg of Relpax with an ice water chaser after this, and hiding away in his sound-proof, hermetically sealed, blackhole of a condo for at least the next 16 hours. He braced himself for what he knew would be a loud and vicious comeback, but was completely caught off-guard when all he got was silence.

Absolute silence.

Silence and the sudden look of anguish that wiped away all traces of her rage that came before it. His face fell too, then everything stopped.

Neither spoke nor moved nor even remembered to breathe in that millennium of a moment.

I just want to know what he's feeling…

I do care about her feelings...

Why did I do that to him? I came here to try to apologize…how did it come to this?

She didn't deserve that. I'm just having a bad day, and my head has been aching for hours…how could I have said those awful things to her?

If only he'd let me in, let me near him…we could be so happy…doesn't he see that?

It's so obvious…she could do so much better than me… why can't she see that?

God, I love him, but sometimes he infuriates me to no end…why won't he just talk to me?

I love her so much, but why can't she see that this is all that I am? I don't know how to be what she needs…

I can't do this anymore…

Unbeknownst to the two in their silent pleadings, both reached this final thought at the same time. Tears glistened in their eyes as the final sparks of their hope were quietly snuffed out.

Sara's mind replayed the last thing that had flown unbidden from Grissom's lips. As the remnants of her love began to trickle down her cheeks, she whispered out a gravelly response before retreating once and for all.

"You may be the one exception to that rule."