Some Kind of Nightmare

by GermanJoan

Author's Note:

This fanfic is based on 2x15 "Romancing the Joan". Those who don't know that episode yet and don't want to get spoiled shouldn't read it.

Do you remember episode 2x15 where Joan had these dreams after she kissed Roger? When I re-watched the dream sequence again recently, I had this idea that Adam (after what happened with Bonnie) might have had a similar dream, a nightmare. Thus, I changed the conversation between him and Joan slightly.

Special thanks go out to TeeJay, who always helped me with well-meant advice and with the translation from German into English. I'm really glad that we're sharing our big "Joaniverse" with each other! ;)

I may have been a little hard on Bonnie ... please forgive me:g:

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The rain is beating against the window pane in irregular, unrelenting but gentle tock-tock sounds. It seems that the world outside is coming to an end, all the while Adam is restlessly turning in his bed in his sleep.

Adam's Dream

While Adam adjusts the collar of his coat to shield himself from the damp cold and the cutting wind of the pitch-black night, he watches the houses around himself from the corner of his eye. Everything seems desolate, only few buildings line this part of town and those that Adam passes look deserted and slightly derelict. Adam shivers and crosses his arms in front of his torso to preserve the little warmth from his body, which doesn't yield much success.

A few yards ahead, he suddenly recognizes a dimly lit house in front of which a small crowd of people is assembled. He stops hesitatingly and tries to decide whether he should go there, but then decides in favor of it after all. The people in front of the building eye him dismissively. The majority of them are men, some having arrived with motorcycles, but there are also a few women among them that look like their company or services might be buyable. The scrutiny of these people makes Adam feel uncomfortable and he makes his way to the entrance as quickly as possible.

When Adam opens the doors to the inside of the establishment, the smell of stale smoke and beer hits him like a brick wall. He realizes with sudden clarity that he has entered a nightclub. Hesitantly, he walks into the room past tables at which strangers are sitting, smoking and drinking. It's quite dark in the club, only a few murky lights glow near the bar and there are two or three disco balls fastened to the ceiling that are sending light flashes through the room. Tables are assembled round a pedestal in the middle of the room on which half-naked women are pole-dancing or writhing on the floor.

For a second Adam's face contorts in a confused grimace. He watches how some men stuff bills into the women's panties until the sight of it disgusts him and he turns around to quickly walk on.

The air is so stifling that Adam soon has to remove his coat. Underneath he wears a dark suit with a red tie. Finally, he finds a vacant table in the back at which he sits down with some relief. He asks himself what he's doing here and how he got here in the first place. A feeling of uneasiness washes over him. A scantily dressed waitress approaches his table, wordlessly placing a drink on the table in front of Adam and then walks off again. Adam opens his mouth to call her back and tell her he never ordered this, but then thinks the better of it.

He takes the glass into his hand and stares at the liquid inside meditatively. Carefully, he smells it to identify what it might be. A strong scent of alcohol reaches his nose and he takes a very small sip. 'Whoa, pretty strong stuff,' he thinks to himself and puts the glass back on the table.

While he's watching the ice cubes that clank against the glass wall, he suddenly hears a female voice, "Is this seat still vacant?"

Without looking up, he mumbles, "Yeah, sure."

"Great. Thank you," the voice answers. For the first time, Adam looks up to see who sat down next to him. The face that is framed by long, brown hair is immediately familiar to him, even though he hasn't seen it in a long time.

"Joan!" he exclaims.

Her eyebrows furrow in confusion as she looks at Adam. "Do I know you?"

Adam lifts his hands to explain. "Oh, uhm, we ... we were in high school together."

An expression of recognition lights Joan's face. "Alex, right?"

"Adam", he corrects her.

Casually, she answers, "Yes, right. Adam. We were friends in high school? Really?"

"Yeah, don't you remember—"

Suddenly, an unfamiliar man appears next to Joan and sits down next to her unbidden, giving her a quick peck on the cheek. He is wearing the same suit and tie as Adam. To Joan he says, "Sorry, darling. I had to take care of something for tomorrow."

In reply to Adam's questioning glance, Joan introduces the young man. "Adam, my husband, Roger Fisher."

"Nice to meet you," Roger answers as he extends his hand towards Adam which Adam shakes hesitantly. Roger stupidly grins at him so that Adam is suddenly overcome with the urge to wipe the fake smile off his face.

Joan's eyes suddenly widen in surprise as she studies Adam. "Oh, now I know! We dated in high school."

"Yes. Right," Adam answers.

Joan then laughs. "I was all into you. How'd it go wrong?"

Adam doesn't know what to say. "We... I... I..."

"Wait, I remember. You slept with Bonnie."

Roger raises an eyebrow. "You slept with Bonnie? Bonnie, the hooker?"

Adam follows Roger's glance towards the pedestal. Now he recognizes Bonnie on it, who is pole-dancing in the background on the platform in the middle of the room. At one point she leans forward to the middle-aged men sitting close by who lavishly cram dollar bills into her skimpy latex bra.

In an accusing tone, Joan asks him, "Why did you sleep with Bonnie?"

Adam is still speechless. "I... don't know. I—"

But Joan doesn't let up. "How could you sleep with her? Why did you sleep with her?"

Suddenly all Adam can se is Joan's contorted, angry face and her piercing voice reverberates through his head:

"Why did you do it? Why did you have to sleep with Bonnie?"

Adam's eyes jerk open. He is lying on his bed, but it takes him a second for reality to sink in. He realizes that he must have sweated because his t-shirt is clinging to his body.

Contemplatively, he gets up and walks over to the window. Outside it is still dark night and the thunderstorm is still raging. As a stroke of lightning bathes the room in white light for a second, he can see his own reflection in the window and suddenly he can't stand the look in his own eyes.

What a stupid idiot he had been when he slept with Bonnie! Why on earth had he done it? Yes, he was an idiot and an even bigger traitor. He had betrayed Joan. Joan, of all people. And he didn't even have a plausible explanation for it.

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JoA and its characters don't belong to me but to CBS, Barbara Hall Production and Sony, or in German speaking areas maybe even Pro7. The previous text was conceived by me. I borrowed some of the dialogue from RTJ but changed some of it slightly.