NCIS: LOS ANGELES
I Can't Keep Running...
DISCLAIMER:
NCIS: Los Angeles and characters do not belong to me.
SUMMARY:
I run faster and faster...wanting to run away from the horrors of my past. Things that had happened to me...
Running to try to escape the past, but it is still in my thoughts day after day and year after year.
Marty Deeks hides behind a mask of fear, but when something happens how will he deal with it?
CHAPTER 1: A Dream...
DEEKS P.O.V.
DREAM *
I run faster and faster...wanting to run away from the horrors of my past.
Things that had happened to me...
Running to try to escape the past, but it is still in my thoughts day after day and year after year.
Finally, I reached the beach and then I tripped, falling face down in the sand.
I sit up after falling and stare out at the ocean. The nice sunny day seems to mock me, because the ocean seems so calm and peaceful right now.
When my mind and my life are not.
I know...
I can't keep running! I have to face my past and my nightmares!
I wanted to, but at the same time, I was scared...not that I would admit that to anyone.
Everyone seems to think I always joke around and do not have a serious side.
If only they knew the truth...
The mask I put up to hide from the past.
Some things are hard to remember and other things...they are just too painful to think about!
Many memories a blur, others...
They are as sharp as a knife cutting into my skin and it hurts so much. I just want to forget what happened in the past.
For so long I have kept the secret of wanting to die from the pain, behind jokes.
In my mind, much of what Gordon John Brandel put me through was a nightmare, so at times it did not seem real.
Now though...
I cannot say that anymore, because...
It did happen and it was real!
What he put me through was torture, but I had learned how to survive... *
END DREAM
I had not been sleeping well, because of nightmares I had been having.
I would start out having the greatest dream and if Kensi knew about these dreams...well, let's just say she would shoot me.
Because for a long time I have been dreaming of Kensi and the future I want with her.
Only recently though...my dreams would start with her, but then something would happen and than my great dream then became a dream of Gordon John Brandel and what he had done to me.
I heard something and realized my phone was ringing. I leaned over to grab it with a groan, when I looked it read...KENSI.
It was three in the morning when I looked at the time, so I wondered why she would be calling me...