I'm fully commited to my facebook fic (New Connections) right now, but I keep thinking a lot about the upcoming episodes and the spec surrounding them. This is my take on spoilers for the Superbowl episode and the Valentines day one. It is a little similar to my past fic Metaphors but will also be from Finn's POV and there is more Puck/Quinn. Just a little something I had in my head and had to get out, if I get good reviews I'll continue.

I can't believe the snow is still here, I think, as I carefully tred outside my front door. Immediately the water seeps through my golden ballet pumps. I grimace as my shoes begin to squelch. I should have picked more sensible shoes but it has taken me years to cultivate my image and an upcoming starlet shouldn't let a little bit of bad Ohio weather get in the way of a cute outfit.

Although they're constantly criticised I happen to adore my collection of polka dot dresses, animal print sweaters and short tartan skirts. I've loved knee socks since pre-school and they're practical too, like keeping my legs warm in this weather. But mostly I like routine. I like to have a plan, a strategy. I like it when things stay the same. Despite my recent heartbreak I have worked hard to keep everything the same. My exercise routine. My healthy eating plan. My family tradition of a takeout and movie during the holiday season.

Except that he's not there and because of that everything seems different.

As my pink Volvo pulls into the lot I check my rear view mirror. White sparkly teeth? Check. Bangs combed so the fall just below my eyebrow? Check. Waterproof mascara? Check. And just so we're clear, the waterproof mascara is to ensure I don't get caught in one of Lima's frequent rain storms, which are really horrendous. Sometimes I used to hang out it in the rain, just as it begun, because I knew sooner or later Finn would arrive and he loves that part of the day, the smell it makes. That's kind of desperate when I think about it. Just so we're clear again, the mascara is not for him. I've cried enough tears over him, over us.

Noah is waiting for me at my locker. I'm immediately concerned because he has a Blueberry Slushie in his hand. This means I'm either getting slushied (at least I have my waterproof mascara) or he's trying to get into my pants again. Neither is a particularly good option.

"Hi" he says nervously, hands in pockets. "I got you this, Blueberry's your favourite flavour right?"

I shake my head as my lips curl into a smile. "Actually it's grape, but I tend to shun these types of drinks altogether Noah. They're full of sugar and empty calories. I prefer to get a rush through a natural diet and exercise routine."

"Geez you're frickin high maintenance woman!" he exclaims as he takes the straw out of his pocket.

I open my mouth to defend myself but I figure if he's taken the time to wait at my locker and hasn't start to feel me up by now, then he must want to say something important.

"It's an apology okay?" he shouts loudly, "Just take it." I roll my eyes as I take a sip. Despite its artificial bright blue colour, it does taste pretty good and the sugar rush hits me immediately. "For what Noah," I ask, growing more panicked as I check the contents of my purse. "Did you steal something again?"

"No I didn't steal jack!" he exclaims loudly "I'm just apologising in my part in what went down last week. You and Finn you're frickin perfect for each other and once again the Puckerman comes in and fucks things up."

"It's fine" I say quietly. I notice Finn at his locker in this distance. He's pretending to be occupied at the notebook, but considering he only uses it to play hangman with Artie in Math class, I know he's watching us.

I lower my voice. "I was to blame too Noah, I was the one who invited you over. I did it out of revenge, to be petty and for that I'm totally ashamed." I wish in a way that my cheating was something more meaningful, part of chemistry I couldn't ignore. Because the truth; the fact that I set out to do something deliberately mean, is a little hard to swallow.

"I don't get it, me and you Berry. The only time we ever get together is when you fight with Finn or want to make him jealous, I'm usually the one that calls the shots with chicks but sometimes I feel you have me by the balls!" He leans it to whisper and as I feel his breath on me I know Finn is watching closely.

I nod sadly, "the truth is Noah, you have really nice arms, you are a great singer and we share an important religious connection and in any other world that would be the foundation of some kind of relationship. But next to what I have with Finn" I correct myself, pained. "…had with Finn" it just pales to insignificance. I don't know what it is, but it's not anything real or anything that could ever resemble a relationship." I take another gulp of my drink, it's artificial sugary ingredients are surprisingly comforting.

"I know," he replies "I don't think anything I've had could come close to you and Finn" I watch as he looks off into the distance, watching Quinn with Sam. He's lightly pressed against her locker and she's leaning forward to kiss him, laughing softly. She's loosly twirling her ponytail in one hand and pulling him closer to her with the other. I don't regret calling them Barbie and Ken, a part of me thinks they're too polished, too perfect. It's a little difficult to know where the facade ends and true feelings begin. He catches me looking in the same direction and sighs, "hey it's cool, we weren't serious, it's not like we had a baby together or anything together" he jokes and I laugh, patting his arm. It seems the polite thing to do and it means he manages to pull himself away from staring at them.

"Maybe it's a kind of weird ass friendship" he adds "hell knows you could use a friend right now considering you're a total loner Berry." He's back to his normal self at least, insulting me. I nod and he holds out his arm "walk you to Glee?"

I shut my locker with some force and begin to walk, politely declining the arm he's holding out to me. Finn's heading in the same direction and I'm done playing mind games to make him jealous, but at the same time Noah's right. I could use a friend right now. I need a friend, I need someone right now. Because at the moment it doesn't feel like I have very much at all.

I love Mondays because Glee is first period. In my book, there's nothing like some vocal warm ups to get the day off to a truly superb start. It also reminds me of my purpose, reinforces my desire to be a star. As we enter I trail a little behind so it looks like we haven't arrived together. I've learnt the High School gossip mill is truly horrific and if I'm seen standing close to Noah, it'll be all over the blogs by lunch time. Unfortunately, my decision to hold back means there is only one seat left. At the back of the room, which I usually hate as being at the front means I can leap up and deliver an impromtue performance before anyone has the chance to stop me. However, maybe it will be good today, a chance to slink in my seat a little, to go unnoticed. Of course, I think, as I make my way up to the back, the seat would have to be next to him. He sighs as he moves his bag, placing it underneath the chair beneath him. I pull out my notebook and pen and flip it open at what I think is an empty page to start making notes but there it is, in clear black ink, Finn Hudson's messy scrawl.

Finn Hudson and Rachel Berry 4Ever.

I love Rachel Berry. Her lips taste like strawberries.

I'm bored, where are we going for dinner again? I like your sweater today.

What was the French homework again babe?

Whilst I'm always fully involved in Glee rehearsals, Finn gets a little bored, so I used to let him use my notebook. I always got a secret thrill when I saw the little notes he left me. Except it's now open on that page and I'm staring at it and Finn's staring at it. We're both staring at it, blinking, almost as if we do it enough we can somehow erase the messages he wrote.

I remove the lid off my pen and I'm not sure if it's cruel to start crossing out the messages but the pain they're causing me is horrific. It's an acute reminder of what could have been if I hadn't made a mistake. I turn over the page and find a clean slate. I begin to write the heading and sigh in frustration as the pen gives out and refuses to write. Finn watches carefully and then without warning, takes the book out of my hand and slams it on the floor.

Luckily the rest of the Glee clubbers don't notice as he mumbles an apology, he leans down to pick it up at the same time I do and all of a sudden we collide. I'm staring into his eyes, feeling the sparks I used to feel when I first fell in love. When we first met and more than anything in the world I just wanted to kiss him. He makes no attempt to pick up the book and instead moves his thumb towards me, gently stroking my bangs. "I'm sorry" he says again. I'm not sure if he means for the book or for hurting me, but either way I really don't care right now. His hand moves to the back of my head as he is inches closer towards me. I sigh as I inhale the scent of his breath and gently curl the back of his hair with my finger. His lips are so close to mine now and he presses them towards me. Everything, I think, will be okay once he kisses me. He'll remember. He'll remember us.

A loud voice fills the room and the sensation, the magic dissolves. Mr Shue places his briefcase on the floor and turns to address us. Finn swiftly jumps up to his seat and if my fellow Glee clubbers notice they don't let on, their full attention (minus Brittany who appears to playing with a barbie) focused on our teacher. I contemplate picking up my notebook that still remains on the floor, a symbol of what I've lost but I decide against it. It hurts too much.

"So guys, I am totally thrilled to announce than the New Directions will be performing at the big game this Friday night. I've already gone ahead and picked the song selection, Meet Me Halfway by The Black Eyed Peas. It's a modern, hip song, which we'll hopefully showcase the new direction we're going in. Finn, Rachel, get up here, you guys are going to take the leads."

I feel all eyes on us as we make the journey to the front of choir room, from Puck's smug smile, perhaps they did notice after all. The opening beats of the song rings out as the group assemble behind us and I've no idea how I'm going to do this. Sing with him. On the one hand it seems so natural, yet the other I think as he begins the first line, not quite willing to sing it in my direction, it seems like the hardest thing in the world.

And so it begins, I think. The heartache, the pain, the things that I've being trying to avoid over the past two weeks, over the holidays.

So it begins again.

So that's it! Please read and review, like I say if the feedbacks good enough I'll continue.