Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental multi-fandom project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 8 April.
AU; Clark and Lex never ended their friendship, Lois never came to Smallville. Clark and Tess are a couple. I may have typed it, Clark and Lex may have played their parts, but the original blame for this idea lies with Ron White since it was inspired by one of the tales he tells on stage.
Disclaimer: "Smallville" is the property of Warner Brothers Entertainment and DC Comics and is used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.
-o0O0o-
"The Stuff of Legends"
By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'
-o0O0o-
Clark Kent and Lex Luthor were friends, the best friends, they had once agreed that their friendship would be 'the stuff of legends' and it was. When a 'meteor-freak' - the Smallville slang term for one of the meta-humans that had recieved their powers from the meteorites caused by the destruction of the planet Krypton - had killed Clark's first girlfriend, Lex had been the only one who could talk Clark out of returning the favor.
'Revenge isn't the answer, Clark,' Lex had said, 'If you think it is, you'll just wind up like me.'
Knowing how much Lex hated the man Lionel Luthor had tried to turn his son into, Clark had let the cops handle the situation after that. When Alicia Baker's murderer had been killed six months later during a patient riot at Belle Reve Mental Hospital, the Kansas farmboy hadn't asked any questions. He had a good idea what had happened, though. Especially with the Luthor family's monetary contribution to Belle Reve for 'increased patient security measures' that was in the news only days later.
The favors went both ways; when Lex had found out that Lionel had left him with another family member that Lex hadn't known about, it had been Clark who went with him to meet the half-sister that Lex had never known; Tess Mercer, born Lutessa Luthor. Why Lionel had put his name on the birth certificate and let her be named Lutessa Luthor instead of Lutessa Jenkins and then had nothing further to do with her was a question nobody could answer. When he had seen the birth certificate, Clark had looked at Lex and asked one question in deadpan seriousness.
'Lionel and Lillian... Lucas, Lex, Lutessa,' Clark had listed off, 'It makes me wonder if your thing for Lana is because her name starts with an L as well.'
'My full name's Alexander, remember?' Lex had retorted, 'Though yeah, I can see your point. But, hey, that's my excuse, what was yours?'
Clark being there when Tess and Lex met for the first time had been a good thing. Not only had he provided Lex with morale support, but he had also managed to keep the two Luthor siblings from killing each other - though Tess had been quick to point out that she was a Mercer because the Luthors hadn't wanted her, causing Lex to answer that he didn't even know about her until now and if he hadn't wanted to get to know her, he wouldn't have came. Clark had broken in and pointed out that instead of being mad at each other, the one they should be angry with was Lionel for abandoning Tess and never telling Lex about her. Tess had folded her arms and brought up the fact that when she had been involved with Oliver Queen, he hadn't many good words to say about Lex.
'Oliver never did like me after Patricia Swann chose me over him,' Lex had pointed out in response.
'Actually, that was something in your favor,' Tess corrected him, 'Considering that I caught him with a blonde cocktail waitress less than a week later.'
Knowing the Luthor propensity for revenge was almost genetic, when Tess had smirked after saying that, Clark had groaned, 'What did you do to him?'
'I keyed his car...' Tess answered, only for Clark to raise the same eyebrow he did when he knew Lex wasn't finished yet, '...slashed all four tires, took a baseball bat and took out the headlights... I may have carved something into the seats... and I might even have put the thing in his swimming pool when I was done with it.'
Clark had looked at Lex and shook his head at that and the proud look on the other man's face, 'She's a Luthor alright.'
The most unexpected part of the trip to meet Tess, especially for Lex, happened a few months later, after Tess had moved to Metropolis. She and Lex had been getting to know each other slowly, but apparently she and Clark had been moving a little faster; or at least that's what the first thing that popped into Lex's mind was on the day he walked into Clark's apartment and found his best friend and his half-sister making out on Clark's couch.
'Clark! You don't date your best friend's sister,' Lex had insisted, 'There's unwritten rules about that sort of thing.'
'I thought the Luthor family motto was that rules were for other people?' Clark retorted.
'As she's so fond of pointing out, Tess grew up a Mercer,' Lex answered defensively.
Tess had laid her head on Clark's shoulder before answering, 'In this case, I'll make an exception on the Luthor-Mercer thing. That's a stupid rule that other people can follow, because we're not.'
Lex chuckled and looked at Clark, 'Welcome to the family, brother.'
Ironically enough, Lex had taken the news of Clark and Tess being in a relationship better than Clark's remaining parent had the weekend that Clark had taken the Luthor siblings with him on a visit back to Smallville and the Kent Farm. The three of them had been outside in the barn's loft, Clark's childhood 'Fortress of Solitude', when Lex had gone inside the house to get a drink and noticed Martha Kent standing at the window staring out at the barn.
'I guess you'd prefer it if Clark were seeing Lana or Chloe,' Lex had commented
'He can see whoever he wants, he's a grown man now,' Martha had answered, 'I'd just prefer it if my son wasn't seeing a Luthor.'
'It could be worse,' Lex shrugged, causing Martha to turn and look at him with hard eyes.
'And just how is that?'
Lex smirked, 'Clark could be involved with me instead of Tess.'
The look on the mother's face at that moment was well-worth the lecture he got from her son when Clark learned what Lex had said. That had been a month before and now the trio were back in Smallville again, staying at the Luthor mansion this time since Lex had something he wanted to show off to his best friend and de facto brother. The problem Lex faced, however, was that Clark just wasn't that impressed by his new car.
"Lex, you've got Lamboghinis, Porshes, Ferraris, what's so important about this one?"
Lex rolled his eyes, "Clark, I don't think you understand the intricacies of Mercedes-Benz engineering - I've got the three-inch wiper blades that keep my headlights clean in a rain storm."
"Yeah?" Clark looked back over his shoulder at the bed of his pick-up truck before looking back to grin at Lex, "I've got a place to sleep with your sister."
Lex fell back on the only defense he had to that, "Half-sister."
The fact that it caused Clark to just start laughing at his friend proved just how weak a defense that it was. When Tess joined in, Lex knew that he had lost the battle.
"Laugh it up, you two," Lex would claim that he wasn't pouting if confronted with it, "Maybe I should go tell Martha about you living together and see what happens. I bet you'll get a long lecture on 'living in sin' or whatever they call it."
Clark looked at Tess, who gave him a smile and a nod, before he answered, "Maybe at first, but I think we'll get away with it if we tell her our news."
Lex looked at them suspiciously, "I'm not going to be an uncle, am I?"
"Not yet," Tess answered with a slight blush, "Clark, help me?"
With Lex looking on, Clark stepped behind Tess and while she lifted her red hair up and away from her neck, he unlatched a necklace and pulled the end of it out from under her shirt. Carefully, while Tess let her hair fall back down, Clark slid the object hanging on the chain down and into his right hand so that when Tess held out her left, he could place it on her finger so she could show it to her brother where it belonged. When Clark put his hands on Tess's shoulders and she held out her hand so he could see the ring, Lex looked it over; it was a sterling silver setting in the shape of two dolphins circling nose to tail, they had small vibrant blue sapphires for eyes and in the middle between the dolphins, held in place by their fins, was a pearl. The perfect kind of ring for someone who loved the ocean and water as much as his sister did.
"Not an uncle," Clark commented, "But how about a Best Man instead?"
Knowing that this would mean the man he thought of as a brother would really be his brother, brother-in-law at least, Lex grinned and nodded, "Sure, if you survive telling your mother."