He had been sure. This whole time, all these years he had. Even if sometimes, if the light hit the older man's face just right, he thought maybe, just maybe. But he told himself that it was impossible. The man was dead. His mother had told them all that years ago. He had died in a fire. She had been so positive, so sure. He had no reason to doubt her. Even if the other man's smile brought back images so vivid, he could almost reach out and touch them. She had said he was dead, died right after her sister, right after his cousin had moved in to live with them, when she was still a little girl.
He had been sure. Even after his mother's first visit and last visit. Abruptly, she had left the night after they had dinner at the diner. But it couldn't be, it was impossible. She had told them he was dead.
It wasn't possible. Even though his mother had never let his cousin come for a visit. Even when he had married, his mother had begged him to marry at home. She said it was because his brother had to be in it, and he couldn't come back to Port Charles. He should marry at their family home. Bring his new bride, and her family away from Port Charles and marry in their secluded sanctuary. And he had complied. His wife hadn't complained, and since her family consisted only of her one nephew, who knew his cousin well, he hadn't complained either. And his mother was right. His brother couldn't come here, and he did want him to be in his wedding. So there had been no reason to wonder, no cause for concern.
She had said he was dead, why would she lie. When they moved back, he had invited his mother and his cousin several times to visit. His mother always declined, saying that his brothers' run ins with the law made her uncomfortable, and that his cousin was far too busy, first with school, then with working to come.
Why didn't he push harder for his cousin to visit? It couldn't have been because he was worried, because he wasn't. The man was dead. Then why, when his wife's nephew convinced her to come visit, did a sense of dread fill him? He wasn't surprised, they had attended the same boarding schools for years, even before he and his wife had gotten married. They had gotten close as children, then reunited at his wedding. So he shouldn't have been surprised when she called and said she was coming for a visit. Oh, his mother hadn't been happy, no, but she hadn't really tried to stop her. She had called him though, worried, although his cousin had traveled frequently, so he couldn't really understand why. Just that she was concerned about Port Charles' "bad element" and didn't want to get his cousin involved. He had assured her that she would be fine, he and the "bad element" didn't get along, so there was no reason to worry. His mother had paused then, and for a moment he thought she was going to say something else, but she hadn't, just sighed and said to take care.
That was the last time they had spoken. His cousin had arrived, excited, beautiful, all the things she ever was. He and his wife had picked her up from the airport. She was hungry, but didn't want anything fancy, just run in to a store and get something to eat.
It should have been no big deal. Because the man was dead. He had no reason to think that he wasn't.
So why didn't he want to bring his cousin here? If he was so sure, why had he blanched when his wife had suggested it? Why had he thought of every excuse in the book not to go there? Why did he practically beg his wife to just go to Metro Court even though the diner was right on the way?
She hadn't of course. Because he couldn't tell her the real reason.
That his mother had lied.
He hadn't been sure.
That the man hadn't died.
And that he had known all along.
And now, here they were.
"You're supposed to be dead." The words came out in a harsh whisper before she could stop them. But what else was she supposed to say? There he was 20 years after her aunt had told her he was dead. Standing in front of her, holding that coffee pot, looking like he had just seen a ghost. She had no doubt of who he was. She had looked at his picture so much while she was growing up, that his image had been burned into her brain. Even though he had aged, she knew him. Knew his eyes and the way they would light up when she ran to him. Knew his mouth and the way it would curve into a smile when he saw her. There was no light now though, and no smile.
She saw the dark hair man who had been talking to him when she walked in turn to her a cold stare hardening his handsome features. The blond haired man and woman next to him both stood from the table where they had been eating dinner. She felt her cousin, more of a brother really since they had been raised together, stiffen behind her and suck in his breath. His wife was silent standing next to him.
"Courtney" more like a soft sigh then an actual word. Even though he was standing right behind her, if it hadn't been dead silent in the diner, she never would have heard it.
"Jax" she didn't turn to face him. She couldn't bear to look him in the face and see the answer to the unasked question that hung in the air between them. Had he known along?
The silence was thick. She could sense the confusion from the two at the table, and the intensity from the dark haired man. He tore his gaze from her and looked at the man standing in front of her.
"Mike?" how could one word ask so much? He finally moved, setting the coffee pot down gently and turning to face the dark haired man.
"Sonny" she heard his voice for the first time in 20 years and it sounded just the same. A rich baritone that used to warm her from her head to her toes. Now it just made her heart drop further. Here she was, after 20 years, and he had chosen to speak to that dark haired man first.
Her cousin's wife moved to stand on the other side of her, gently placing a hand on her shoulder. "Courtney" Alexis stopped speaking and turned towards her husband, her eyes questioning and concerned.
"Would someone please tell me what the hell is going on?" This from the blond haired woman. She moved closer to Courtney.
"Carly" he spoke again, turning away from the dark haired man and looking at the confused blond. He still hadn't spoken to her.
"Mike" Carly replied, sarcasm dripping from her words like water coming out of a faucet. "Are we just going to go around the room saying everyone's first name, or are you going to tell us what the hell is going on and why this Courtney person said you were supposed to be dead?"
"Carly" this from the brown haired man, a more soothing tone then the one he had used with Mike, but with a subtle warning running through it.
"What Sonny?" She turned to him, her eyes flashing. "Don't you want to know who this girl is, asking your father why he isn't dead?"
Father. The word hung in the air. Father. She looked from Mike to the dark haired man called Sonny. Father? No it wasn't possible.
"Father?" The word came out before she could stop it.
He turned to her again. "Courtney." He spoke her name finally. It broke her heart into a million pieces.
"Daddy" more of a sob than a word and she felt Jax place his arms around her. She wanted to fall back into him, but forced herself to shrug him off.
"Daddy" she said again, and the tears fell, as the blond woman called Carly gasped, her cousin Jax pulled her towards him, his wife Alexis stared at Mike and Mike's son stared at Courtney, disbelief shining in his hard brown eyes.