A/N: I know I've changed a LOT because during this Grey's rewatch, I kind of adore Leah Murphy. She's a wreck and I can relate. Seasons 9 and on are the seasons I've only watched once, I'm only halfway through season 10 so I don't really remember her ending. However, I want her to have a happy ending based on where I am now (right before April's wedding). It's based on if Leah went with Cristina to Switzerland instead of Shane. Also, Burke is still working at Cristina's new hospital in this story. Don't know if it's the case in canon, as this story is posted before I've finished this season's rewatch. The timeline is super fucked up – takes place about a month after a heartbreaking event in season 14. It's a goofy story. Enjoy, R&R appreciated as always.
"You know," the black-haired woman piped up from across the room, "If you stopped looking out that window like a love-struck puppy every damn day, you might actually meet someone."
The woman at the window turned over her shoulder. "Oh, come on, don't keep pretending like you actually care about my love life." She crossed to the desk, where the black-haired woman sat with steepled fingers in front of a laptop. "Unless… you do? Because," the woman at the window sighed, leaning against the other, "I'd really love to talk about-"
"No, Murphy," the black-haired woman groaned, fixed on her screen, "You know I don't care about whatever one night stand you've fallen in love with this time."
"You're so damn mean, Cristina."
"Shut up, I gave you your job, Leah."
Leah nudged Cristina's shoulder with her own and stood back up, going back to her window. The room was silent for a while, with the occasional flurry of keystrokes, until Leah sighed, "Thank you. Again."
"For what?" Cristina asked, clear in her tone that she was only half paying attention.
"For my job." Cristina remained silent, and Leah rolled her eyes. "What are you working on?"
"Don't you have a surgery or something?"
"Not until-" her pager went off, interrupting the hope that she had a few more hours, "-right now." She squinted down at the screen. "Crap. Time just got away from me."
"Well, you better go," Cristina said, "I'm so sad to see you go."
"Oh, shut up, Yang," Leah snapped, grabbing her white coat off of Cristina's other desk chair and snapping it on over her shoulders. As she flung open the office door and got almost halfway down the hall, Cristina called after her, "You're welcome!"
Leah paused, whirled around, and knocked herself back into the doorframe. "What was that, Yang?" Her pager beeped again and she basically pirouetted around again, listening to Cristina let out a rare laugh behind her. She jogged down the hall, knowing that two pages always led to reprimanding by Dr. Burke. She was kind of excited to hear more surgeries that he'd done when he worked at Grey-Sloan Memorial (though she was better at hiding it now. She'd matured leaps and bounds overseas, despite thinking she was full-grown before). Not to mention the fact that she was about to preform her 30th cardio surgery. She had been heavily focused on neonatal surgery, but with her hands used to tiny hearts, she was well liked by the cardio attendings, and their surgeries were always a rush. She understood why Cristina loved her job.
"Watch it!" someone shouted through her thoughts. She snapped back to reality just as she collided with someone's elbow, knocking coffee onto the floor. Ice bounced on the tile.
"Oh my god," Leah yelped, assessing the causality, "I am so-" The woman in front of her flipped her hair, mouth parted, clearly ready to yell, or at least sternly talk, then her eyes widened. "-Sorry… Are you ok?"
"I just didn't realize you weren't an intern, I didn't mean to snap at you-"
"Slow down," Leah said, "I'm not mad at you. I'm barely a fellow. And besides, I knocked into you." She took the time to take in the flustered intern, who was turning pink in the cheeks, still wearing wide eyes.
"Yeah, but you were probably off to a surgery and I- Oh my god, you're off to a surgery, I'm so sorry. I'm still pretty new here, I seem to keep getting under everyone's feet-"
Leah's pager went off a third time. "I have to go," she said, cutting off the intern, already back on her jog, "I'm sorry!" she yelled over her shoulder, pushing through another door.
"It's my-" the intern was saying, before the door swung shut behind her.
Leah collapsed into a chair in Cristina's office. Her feet hurt, her eyes were drooping, and all she wanted was some sleep. All the beds in the on-call rooms were taken – with sleeping doctors (she'd been so used to walking into quickies, she woke up at least a dozen doctors walking into them before she realized doctors here actually slept). The clock on the desk read 2:59 am, and as the hour hand ticked to 3, her stomach clenched with hunger. "Be quiet," she growled at her stomach, "Just five minutes." Her eyes slid closed.
"Come on, Mer," came a loud voice, "It's like 3 am, why aren't you asleep?"
"3 am where you are, maybe," came a response.
Leah's eyes snapped open. The clock read 3:26 am. "Murphy?" The lights flicked on and Cristina stood over her. "I'm sorry," she croaked, uncurling herself from whatever position her body had found in the twenty minutes of sleep she'd gotten, "The surgery went longer than I thought. The on-call rooms were full. I'm a danger to the road like this."
"You're a danger to the eyes, too, kid," Cristina chuckled.
"Hi, Leah," came a voice from the phone.
"It's just Murphy, Mer, I don't know why you get excited every time," Cristina said.
"Hi, Meredith," Leah returned, ignoring the surgeon.
"Are you doing big things?" Meredith asked.
"Bigger and better."
"All right, Murphy. Time to scurry on home," Cristina said, "That, or make yourself useful and get me some coffee." Leah thought of her empty apartment and shuddered.
"Fine," she said, "Usual?"
"Yeah, yeah." Cristina waved her off as she stood and left through the door she had flung herself through just 12 hours earlier, this time walking, her feet dragging as she headed to the attending's lounge.
"Dr. Murphy!"
Leah's head whipped around; the intern from earlier was fast walking down the hallway to her, scrubs coffee-free.
"Oh, hi!" she called back, surprised at the flutter in her chest. "Uh… I didn't get your name earlier."
"I'm Sam- Dr. Bello- I. I'm Samantha Bello," the cute intern stammered, holding out her hand. Leah took it, giving it a firm shake, before dropping it. Her palm suddenly felt hot. "I, uh, asked about you. You're Dr. Leah Murphy."
"What else do they say about me? Always knocking into people with coffee?"
Sam laughed nervously, "Do you?"
"No," she chuckled to put the flustered woman at ease, "Only the cute ones."
Sam looked down at the floor, fingers going to her hair. "Oh, uh-"
"I'm sorry," she got out quickly, "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."
"No, no, it's not… You didn't. I just get… flustered easily in new places."
"When I first got here, I was a wreck. Back at my old place, I was a wreck, too."
"Really?" Sam looked back up, smiling.
"I can tell you all about it over a drink?" Leah offered, mentally writing off getting coffee for Cristina. The surgeon wouldn't move from her desk for hours once she was facetiming Meredith Grey.
"I'd... I'd really love to," Sam murmured, smiling softly. Then the smile dropped. "It's so late, though. I should, um, get home."
"No problem," Leah returned, voice just as soft, "Another time. Would you like a ride home? Or at least, walk you to your car?" It was happening again, she could feel it - for an intern of all people. She flashed Sam a smile, thinking this is how Arizona Robbins must have felt.
"Uh… Ok. Yeah. I'd like that." Sam returned the smile.
"I just have to stop by the attending's lounge and get my stuff."
"I've never been in there."
"Well… Tonight might just be your lucky night." Leah blushed at her own words, and then grew redder as she realized Sam was blushing, too.
"This is where you leave me," Sam said, when they were in the parking lot. "Red," Leah commented on the car's color, "Flashy. I like it."
"It's new. I just, uh, came over from the U.S. about three weeks ago."
"Really? You've been here for almost a month and I didn't notice your wonderful face?" she chuckled, raising an eyebrow. The intern turned a soft shade of pink, murmuring,
"I've been flying under the radar," and trailed off, looking down at the ground.
"I'm from the U.S. too," she said, to lighten the sudden change in the intern's demeanor, "How are you liking Switzerland?"
"I'd say I'm pretty neutral about it." Sam looked up from the ground and laughed at her own joke, loud and long and Leah had to join in.
"Haven't heard that one in a long time," she sighed, leaning against the intern's car. Something inside caught her eye. "Is that… a pillow? And toothbrush?" She turned back to see a pale-faced Sam. "Oh, no! I'm not teasing you, I used to take naps in my car all the time as an…" she trailed off as the intern's face went pale, "Are you living out of your car?"
"No!" Sam shouted. "No," she repeated, quieter, "Not exactly, I, well. I am, ah, between places…" The intern's eyes beaded with tears, though she seemed to be keeping them at bay well enough.
"Call me crazy, because we just met, but. Do you need a place to stay? At least for tonight?" Leah asked, reaching out a hand and resting it on Sam's shoulder. Her stomach did a little somersault as the intern leaned into the touch immediately.
"Thank you, so much, Dr. Murphy-"
"Leah."
"-Leah, for being so nice... it's just been a really rough transition-" Sam started, voice cracking with choked back tears.
"Come back to my place," she murmured, pulling the woman in for a hug, "You can stay as long as you need to. No explanation needed."
Sam nodded against her shoulder and they separated. "Thank you. And, um, sorry about the snot on your shoulder."
"That's why humans invented the washing machine," Leah replied, getting a laugh from the intern, "Come on, Sam." She walked further into the parking lot, shoulder blades tensing as their hands brushed occasionally.
Leah reflected on the month since she met Sam. It had only taken about two weeks for them to fall into a routine. In the interim, Leah had finally succeeded on getting Sam to move all of her stuff out of her car into her apartment, and had given her an empty drawer in her dresser, and plenty of closet space. It was a small apartment, but Leah was determined to put the intern at ease. In return, Sam had taken to waking up a bit earlier than her, making sure there was a fresh pot of coffee on the half foot of counter space she had. There had even been a couple nights where they both fell asleep on the couch after drinking and watching shitty HGTV shows.
Leah felt fondly for the intern, though she had not shared the feelings with Cristina yet, rather kept to the friendly flirtation she had taken up earlier, feeling just as flustered when Sam blushed in response. It was nice to have a friend other than Cristina. She liked her coworkers - you don't work alongside people for four some years without developing friendships - but she missed home.
When Sam told her she, too, had been an intern at Grey-Sloan, she'd been thrilled. "It's a small world," she had slurred, sinking further into the couch. It had been one of their wine nights.
"Who knows, maybe the deportation officers might stroll up here, too!" Sam cackled, pouring her fifth glass of wine.
"Whoa, slow down there, nelly," she laughed right back, taking the glass from the intern's hand. Their hands had stayed together as she put the wine down on the coffee table.
"You've got pretty eyes," Sam whispered, leaning in with a drunk grin, "They're so shiny... my ex fiancé, he had shiny eyes. I thought maybe I'd never see any ever again."
"Thank you?" Leah giggled.
"No, it's a compliment, a real compliment," Sam whined earnestly, before sliding off the couch, thrown back into another laughing fit. That night, they hadn't let go of each other's hands.
That was what Leah thought about as she drove home. She hadn't expected the surgery to be so short; their patient had died on the table. A particularly hard blow to the whole team, and the parents, who had finally, finally succeeded in getting pregnant after years of trying. Her attending had sent her home the moment Leah's eyes teared up; she's gone willingly - these kind of loses we're still hard, even after half a decade. Her radio was turned up to the best cheesy pop station she could find, and sang along at the top of her lungs, trying to smile. Thinking of Sam made it easy.
She stepped quietly into the apartment, trying hard not to wake Sam on the couch as she crept towards her bedroom. She closed the door behind her with a near silent 'click' and flicked on the lights. The bed stirred and she saw the intern roll over and snuggle deep into one of the pillows. Leah felt those now all too familiar flutters in her stomach as she took in the scene; then she turned the lights back off, and groped blindly for a night shirt in her top drawer, quickly changing into it before sliding into bed next to her friend. She faced the wall, afraid of doing something stupid if she looked at the woman.
The sheets moved again behind her.
"Leah?" Sam asked, voice scratchy with sleep. Her heart jumped to her throat.
"Yeah?" she returned.
"I thought you'd be in surgery all night."
"He, uh, didn't make it."
"Oh, hell... I'm sorry."
"Sometimes it happens."
"Do you want your bed?" The mattress shifted. "I can go back to the couch, I shouldn't've-" She rolled over, putting her hand on Sam's arm. "No," she said, too quickly, too fiercely. Sam's eyes flashed in the light from the window. "You're fine. Stay." She let go of the woman's arm and turned over again, trying to calm her galloping heart. She listened to the woman settle back in.
"Thanks," Sam breathed, voice going tired again, that same arm curling around her waist and pulling her in closer, "I like to be the big spoon." Sam's hand closed over hers. The minutes stretched on, silence broken by her pulse roaring in her ears as she tried to sleep with Sam spooning her, breath warm and sweet against her neck. Their hands fell just under her chest, and she felt the woman's thumb rubbing circles between her breasts. She wondered if Sam even knew what she was doing, or if the woman was just close enough to sleep that she wasn't conscious of it.
"Sam?" she whispered. She wasn't sure if she wanted a response. Maybe Sam was just snuggly when sleepy or drunk. Sam did have an ex fiancé, maybe they were still close. Maybe she had been flirting too much, pushing too much, wanting too much.
"Mmhm?" came the drowsy response. Leah steeled her nerves and rolled over, their linked hands landing between them. Immediately, Sam's broke away and slid up her arm, resting between her shoulder blades, fingertips brushing the end of her neck, holding her against her still. Leah moved her hand to the intern's chin, just watching the shadows fall across her cheeks. "What's up, Leah?" Sam's eyes were open just a crack, and she had a crinkly smile on her lips.
She wanted to hear that sleepy voice for the rest of her life. "I just... uh. Nothing."
"Mmm," the intern sighed, fingers now playing with the hair that had fallen out of her ponytail, "You've got those sparkly eyes again."
And then she was being kissed. It was warm, soft, stirring a storm of butterflies in her stomach. Her hand slid around and sank her fingers into that long black hair. She drank it in, this refuge from the harsh reality of life.
When Sam pulled back, her eyes blinked open slowly, taking in the proud grin on her friend's lips. "I've been wanting to do that since we met," the woman confessed, thumb rubbing the notches of her neck.
"Me, too," she managed. Her body felt loose, her pulse still racing, lips warm from the kiss. Sam's grin turned to blush and she snuggled closer under Leah's chin.
"Thanks for being my refuge. You've made me feel so safe and welcomed. Like coming home."
"Crap, you're gonna make me cry," she said, trying to chuckle as she choked back tears of overwhelming joy. Sam managed a laugh, too, before Leah tilted her chin back, pressing their lips together again, rolling them over to press her to the mattress, giggling around the kiss like a little schoolgirl. Hands gripped at her nightshirt, tugging it up to allow Sam's fingers to dig into her back. She broke off the kiss, sitting up on top of Sam.
"Does this mean that, um… we should start dating?" she asked, voice timid, trailing a finger down the intern's cheek, pressing her thumb to her lips.
"We should," the intern murmured, kissing the digit, "Now, please, come back down here so I can kiss you again." The hands her back pushed against her, and she went with the pressure, accepting the new kiss with hunger. When they broke away breathless, she settled down next to Sam and wrapped her arms around the woman, holding her tight. If she was going to be a real girlfriend, a home, she was going to be warm, soothing, and protective. Please don't let me mess this up, she thought, as Sam turned and tucked herself under her chin. As Leah's eyes drifted shut, she replayed the kisses over and over. This was something she just had to tell Cristina - even if the surgeon didn't give a damn about her love life.