Interviewer: So what do you really think of Draco Malfoy?
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Lavender: Vile. Absolutely disgusting. A real slimy Slytherin... with great hair.
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Parvati: I'm not going to lie; I'd eat pudding off his chest.
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Hermione: Ginny says he's a Viking in the sack.
Ron: WHAT?!
Hermione: I'm joking Ronald.
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Draco: Oh Merlin is that really what you're asking? What has everyone else said?
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Ron: Stupid ferrety arse. I swear if he's touched my sister I'll murder him.
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Harry: What's this I've heard about Ginny and Vikings? I thought we were talking about Malfoy?
Interviewer: We were... so what's your take?
Harry: Er Malfoy's ok... well he is now anyway.
Interviewer: What do you think of the allegations that Draco and your fiancé Ginny have had a romantic relationship?
Harry: ...What?
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Luna: Does anyone know why Harry seems to be choking Draco? Maybe he has a few extra strong nargles in his head. That's nice of Harry to get rid of them.
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Ginny: How come everyone in the waiting room is having a punch up?
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Pansy: Hot. I've told him so too but he still won't sleep with me. What the hell is going on out there?
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Ginny: Seriously what are they fighting about?
Ron (from a distance): Cut his hands off!
Ginny: Oh Merlin.
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Astoria: I'm not sure how I feel... he was a humungous jerk at school, an awfully cute jerk, but still a jerk... maybe if he were a bit nicer…
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Seamus: Have you seen what's going on out there? It's insane! Harry and Ron are trying to kill Malfoy, Hermione and Ginny are trying to stop them pounding his face in, Parkinson's running round in circles screaming and everyone else is either yelling at each other or unconscious. It's bloody hilarious. Oh there goes Dean, better back him up.
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George: I used to daydream about punching him in the face, and I gotta say it was just as excellent as I imagined it would be, but I guess the little twerp isn't so bad now.
Interviewer: When did you punch him in the face?
George: Just now.
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Ginny: I DID NOT, NOR WILL I EVER, SLEEP WITH DRACO MALFOY! Geez Harry, you're dumber than I thought. I'm not sure if I want to marry someone this stupid.
Harry: You know you love me.
Ginny: I suppose, just a little. So what was the original question?
Interviewer: What do you really think of Draco Malfoy?
Ginny: Well ever since he stopped being a prat, he's a pretty good guy *glances at Harry*... ugly though.
Harry: *Smiles*