The Sasha Crown Affair

The Sasha Crown Affair

Kim Possible and related characters are the property of Walt Disney.

The guard's shoes echoed in the hall as the last round was completed. When the noise faded, a window opened. A lithe figure in black slipped into the building. The pale face glowed with satisfaction. Shego took out a length of fishing line and tied it to the window latch. Finding the open window had been providential, and after exiting, she would lock it, breaking the line and pulling it out after her. No one would ever know how she had gained entrance.

After pushing the window closed, she made her way down the wall and crouched on the floor. No sound or motion greeted her. Calculating the guard's distance, she began to move toward her objective. It took little time to make it. They were cocky; no alarms, no cameras. You think too much of yourselves. Thought you weren't supposed to do that.

There it was, behind the curtain. She reached into her backpack. It only took a moment to finish her work. Perfect. Would love to stay, but there are so many other crimes to commit.

Green eyes went wide when she turned. They were behind her, three of them. She sprang to her left to escape, and almost ran into three more. A quick look to her right and four more had joined the assembly. Shego considered herself able to take out any six Global Justice agents in a fight. But ten of you? Hopeless.

She raised her arms as one detached from the others. "Okay, you've got me."

The figure motioned for her to follow. The others closed in around her as they went down a hallway. More came out to see what was going on. All of them up and ready? How did they know?

Shego knew the office they took her to: knew it well. The face was new to her, but the expression was very familiar, down to the sigh.

"Sasha. You should know. Never return to the scene of the crime if the place has a strong institutional memory."

SCA

"All right, everyone line up."

Twenty girls in white dresses got into line. Nineteen held bunches of flowers. The blond girl at the front held a garland. She looked back at the black haired girl at the end of the line, who wrinkled her face at her.

"Be ugly, that's what your good at." Sophia Guggenheim sniffed. "Our class is first, and I'm first in our class. They should put you all the way in the back, so you won't scare anybody, Sasha Ghostface."

"I can't be as scary as you, Sophia BOOGERHEIM!"

"Girls, stop it!" Sister Martha scooted over to keep the two from closing in on each other. "It's almost time to start. You don't want your parents to see you fighting, do you?" When the girls did not answer, she asked another question. "Do you want HER to see you fighting, today of all days?" They finally shook their heads.

Music filtered in from the sanctuary. Sister Martha went to the door, one hand went to the door, and the other lifted. It went down as the door opened, and the girls began to walk forward and sing.

The girls filed down the aisle. To the trained ear, they were generically good, as opposed to generically bad. To the assembled parents, they sounded angelic. Sophia Guggenheim was radiant as she led the way. The May Queen waited by the curtained statue. Sophia held up the garland and the May Queen accepted it with a smile. An altar boy reached for a cord and pulled the curtain aside as the May Queen turned to face the Madonna.

The May Queen gasped. Sophia Guggenheim screamed. The assembly stared in shock.

"Sacrilege!"

SCA

"It was quite the scandal." The Mother Superior noted.

"I kinda remember," Shego replied, "I was pretty young at the time."

"And they never found out who did it. Even Go City's finest were stumped."

SCA

"Daddy, what are you doing home?"

"Come on, Sasha, I'll take you to school."

"Yes, sir." The little girl's normal enthusiasm was muted. She started to the back door of the cruiser.

"Why are you going back there? You're sitting with me."

They pulled out and were on their way. Sasha looked over the gear, but quietly. Her eyes kept darting back to her father. He kept his on the road.

"You know, they asked me to help them find out who did it."

"Really?" She shrank back in the seat. "What did you find out?"

"Well, we dusted for prints on the football and helmet, but we didn't find anything. I didn't think we would. This one is smart. Cleaning the football was easy; anybody would've done that, same with the outside of the helmet. But they cleaned the inside of the helmet too. They even took out the ear pads and cleaned behind them. Nobody does that, not unless they know how police investigate."

"So you don't have any prints? What do you do now?"

"Since we don't have any prints, we're going to look at motives. That might tell us something about the person, or persons, who did this." Officer Go glanced at his daughter. "At first it looks like someone being disrespectful, or just having some fun. However, I took a good look at the items used.

"Let's start with the helmet. They didn't use just any toy helmet; that was an official, authentic Go City Maulers helmet, like the team uses. I bet someone had to save their allowance for a long time to afford that one."

"Months." Sasha whispered as she looked out the window. She turned back. "But what about the football?"

"By itself the ball's nothing: stadium souvenir, five bucks. But, that's a real autograph on the side. You know whose it is?"

Sasha nodded. "Tim Mayhan's!" Her eyes went wide and began to tear. Daddy just watched the road.

"Yep, Tim Mayhan, quarterback of the last Go City Maulers Superbowl Champions. He doesn't give out autographs that often. Sister Francine told me they're gonna put that up for auction in the next school fundraiser. It should bring them a lot of money." He sighed, "A lot more than I could come up with.

"So we know that these items weren't cheap. They were dear, if not in money, then definitely in sentiment. Whoever did this was really rich, really dumb, or really cared. Now, I know this person was committed, but I still need a motive. Why would anybody give up something they really treasured to put it on a Madonna?"

"Play."

Officer Go looked over to Sasha. "What's that, honey?"

"Play." The little girl's green eyes were somber as she spoke. "I mean, she's a mom, right?"

"Best there ever was."

"And good moms play with their kids. I know Mom plays with us. We play with my dolls, we have teas." Her lips curled with distaste. "And all that Picture Perfect Princess stuff."

Daddy laughed. "I think she buys you that stuff because she likes to play with it herself. But this wasn't a doll, it was football gear."

"But Mom plays with the boys, too. She can throw better than Mike, or Hank!"

"Hank has her on distance, but she's more accurate."

"And me and her beat Hank and Mike at croquette every time!"

"Yeah, your mom's something."

Sasha nodded. "If my Mom can play with her boys, then she must play with Him. She always looks so serious, so sad. Maybe whoever did it wanted her to look happy for a change."

"Maybe. And I think she would approve. I know I do." Officer Go pulled the car over to the side walk. "We're here, honey. Now come here, gimmie a hug."

SCA

The Sisters stepped back as the door opened. Shego's hands were on her hips, she smirked at them.

"Later, ladies!" She strolled through them and disappeared down the hall. Soon they heard a window shut, and the whirl of a hovercar.

Mother Superior stepped out. A Sister went to her. "She wasn't rubbing her hand; did you give her a swat?"

"No, Sister Deborah, I gave her a hug. I watch the news; she gets punched, kicked, and thrown all the time. But I doubt she gets many hugs."

"What do we do now?" Another Sister wanted to know.

"Why, we wait for dawn." Mother Superior shrugged.

And so at after the morning devotional, the Sisters gathered before the draped figure. At the Mother Superior's signal, the drapes were drawn back. The Sisters gasped.

"At least this time it's a more appropriate for the season."

"Sister Catherine, what type of glove is that?"

"Pitcher's."

"Funny, I always see her more as a First Base…person."

"You would, Sister Rachel. Did you ever let a boy even get up on deck?"

"Girls, stop it." Mother Superior shook her head. "I like the Go City Rounder's cap."

"Mother Superior, the glove is autographed!" A Sister examined the signature. "It's Mandy Halifax!"

"Mandy Halifax!" the Sisters were agog. "Do you know how rare his autograph is?"

"We have the centerpiece for this year's school auction." Mother Superior walked up and took the cap off the Madonna. "We'll let this go with the glove."

The Sisters sang a song to the Mother and Child. When they finished, the Mother Superior turned to them.

"Come on, Sisters, we need to make sure everything's ready for today's Crowning."

I know it's a shade early, but when it's done, it's done. Always eager to hear what you have to say, good or bad.