Chapter 1: Judgement

"Beetlejuice," he spoke carefully to the filthy poltergeist. "You actions with Ms. Lydia is to far. She may have forgave for almost killing her father, Charles Deetz, and friend of the family, Otho. Also, causing Adam and Barbra Maitland so much grief." The Judge took a sip from his murky water. "Oh, and who can forget, you forcing that little girl to marry you?!" He slammed the glass on the table, the dark room started to mummer. The Judge took of his gilitin and knocked it a few times. "This is a courtroom people not a zoo. Well Mr. Juice." He turned slightly to him. "Your so-called friends are not here as well. I wonder what they think of you now? Not very appealing eh?" In the center of the room, a figure of a man with dirty light hair (literally dirty), and pale skin. He was chained up and bolted down to the ground. "I should send you to sandworm land. Saturn will suit you fine, for a short afterlife you live." A light from the door opened and an old woman in her best business suit entered the room, her white hair pulled back in a tight small bun and her eyes burned blue-green. "Juno, what the hell is the meaning of this? I was about to send this sad excuse for a ex- human to Saturn!"

Juno took a long drag out of her cigarette, and exhaled the smoke through the slash in her throat. "That's why I have come," she spoke. "Before Beetlejuice is gone, I'd like to write out his last words on this plane and his life history."

The Judge broke into laughter and the jury followed as well. "No one would care to hear his life story! Six centuries of issues, and pranks. That's all I see" Juno waited for the room to be silent before she spoke again.

"I'm not here to write down his afterlife story, like you said 'no one would care.' His life story before he died. Six centuries ago." She took another drag of her cigarette savoring it, the calming of her nerves.

"I thought that is what you where suppose to do when they first arrive to the Neitherworld. And besides he may not even speak the true." The Judge sounded in the most monotoned voice. Juno dropped the butt, before it even hit the ground it vanished.

"Truth serum." She spoke with soft clarity.

"So, we are wasting time on Beetle-- him. Now wasting our rare serum?! I forbid this!" He barked back as sprays of saliva exited his mouth in wild furry.

"Calm down!" Juno called back just as angry. Then she sighed producing another cigarette from her pocket and started smoking it as it touched her lips. She inhaled her sweet nicotine and held it in before exhaling it slowly. "Besides saying his name three times down here if you're dead doesn't do anything anymore. The new rules are if you want Beetlejuice free you have to be in the land of the live but if you're living than you can call upon him anytime. And of course the rule of marriage still apply." Silence took hold in the courtroom. Juno turned her head slightly to see Beetlejuice, unmoving body. still must be in shock, or sorrow,she thought with a slight shake of her head. "Okay, let's have a vote if a single person in this courtroom raises their hand than we get Beetlejuice to take the serum and have him speak of his tale. If nobody raises a single hand than his sentence will be carried out. Sound fair?"

"Disclude yourself and we'll have a deal."

"Done."

"So, anyone in this courtroom care to hear this idiots worthless life story? Hm?"

"I do Monsieur Judge!" a man in the back called.

"As do I!" a woman's voice sounded.

"You both down on the floor!" The furious judge called out. The sounds of clicking and clacking as the pair walk down into the center. "Your names please."

A skeleton with a his gym clothes on and a burea spoke first. "I am Jacques LaLeanMonsieur. And my friend 'ere is Ginger Rodgers." The pink and purple woman spider smiled. "We care to hear Beet-aljoo's life story."

"And raise your hand if you want to see this pest gone," the Judge called to crowd." Everyone raised the hand. With wide grin he turns back to the two objectors. "I see majority rules."

"Hold one bloody second!" Juno snapped. "Are you deaf? I said, if a single person raises their hand in this courtroom than we have Beetlejuice tell his story. We had a deal. And look Beetlejuice has two people who gives a rats' ass of him." A couple chairs appeared for Jacques and Ginger and they took the offer. Juno cracked her fingers as a typewriter appeared ready to write as soon as they are ready. Juno approached the still Beetlejuice and pulled back his hair to the back of his neck. She slowly pulled the serum from the case. She than quickly add six drops of the serum onto the back of his neck with the sound of acid eating a little bit of the back his neck. "Beetlejuice, we want you to say your story."

For the first time since he's been the courtroom he lifted his head. "Where do you want me to begin?"

a/n: So this something i came up with at two o'clock in the morning and i thought it would be intresting so there will be MATURE SCENES up ahead. so just to give all a heads up. So, it's quite obvious that i don't own Beetlejuice and co., it's a fanfiction, just incase you didn't happen to know that was what this site was basically for. any ways, I hope you like this and review please.