A/N I don't own glee or any of its characters. I don't usually do stories mostly poems so I thought I'd give this a shot let me know how I did
There were things I was always sure of. Things that were infallible. I was sure that football was the only thing I would ever be good at. I was positive that I would never be a one woman kind of guy. I would always be just like my old man no matter what I said. I would never be able to change, to be better, and to be mature. I knew that love did not exist and even if it did I would not be worthy. I would always be a "lima loser". All it took was a tiny girl with dreams bigger then both of us to prove me wrong.
We would never be a fairy tale. I was not prince charming on a white horse. Although Rachel maybe a damsel in distress she didn't need saving she could save herself. Being with her was never simple or easy: but loving her was and letting her love me was. The way her and I became us was not romantic or conventional. It just wouldn't have been us if it was. She was my dark dream because people like me didn't belong in the light and she didn't belong in the light. The light was harsh and unforgiving it laid all secrets bare it was hard to hide in the light. All of these things my girl was not besides she was a star and you couldn't see the stars in the light.
Maybe I had always loved her or always wanted to. Both of us belonged to someone else. She had Finn her tall goofy protector and I had Quinn the prom queen from hell. Rachel and I didn't seem like we should be occupying the same state let alone be tangled together. We were nothing if not complicated. We were so complex we couldn't even figure it out.
It is hard to say why we were drawn to each other maybe I understood her in a way Finn never could. How angry her mother abandoning her made her feel and not long after that one of her father died leaving the other a shell that all but ignored her. If one person knew what it was like to be abandoned by the people who were suppose to love you it was me. She accepted me as I was she always pushed me to be the best me I could be but never wanted me to be someone else never needed me to be someone else like Quinn did. Rachel Never told me how nothing in her life was good enough especially not me as every other female I knew seemed to.
I can't place the exact moment I started to fall for her. I do remember the first time I recognized that she might be exactly what I needed. She was standing at her locker looking amazing like a full moon in mid winter. She had given up her knee socks and plaid skirts because that is what her daddy had always said looked the best on her and with him gone there was no need to keep it up. She was wearing a white and ice blue thigh length cowl neck sweater and pair of dark wash skinny jeans with a pair of white suede knee length boots. She looked so soft and warm and my mind wandered to how soft and warm certain parts her were and how I'd like to nuzzle up to them. I saw turn her face to talk to mike she smiled a smile that didn't reach her eyes I saw the sadness there. She laughed at a silly dance move mike did as Tina approached. I felt a pang in my stomach one that whispered that I should be the only one she laughed for. The feeling caught me by surprise. I didn't know where it had come from. I was watching her interact with the other gleeks watching Rachel be Rachel. When a guy passed her and she froze just stopped dead and her face crumbled. A look of utter despair flashed across her face. That look made me indescribably angry. I wanted to break something preferably the face of who ever had made her that sad. Slowly she backed away from the others turned on her heels and ran. The group didn't even notice didn't even look up from their conversation. I followed figuring someone had to care. I was always a sucker for a sad girl. I found her curled into a ball slow tears leaking from her eyes. "What's your deal berry" I questioned. Admittedly not the smoothest way to approach but no one ever said I had any social grace. She looked up at me a startled deer expression on her face. "What do you care Puckerman" she flung at me "going to tell your friends so you can laugh at me later". Her response didn't surprise me just made me very angry. "Fine then cry by your self then see if I care". This did not help matters any but it did cause her to give me an answer. "A boy in the hall was wearing the same cologne as my dead daddy. Pathetic enough for you "she spat between gritted teeth. Now I really felt like an ass. So I did the only thing I knew I could I sunk to the floor beside her tapped her on the chin lightly and said "wow that sucks": like that would even help but I was not a bitch baby I did not know how to be sensitive or how to discuss feeling. My emotional ineptness made her smile so I guess I did my job at least a little. I stood without a word I offered me hand and when slowly pulled her to her feet. She bent and picked up her bag and me being me I checked out her ass which in those super skinny jeans would make a monk have unclean thoughts. She turned abruptly and I looked up trying to play off what I had been doing. "Thanks" she whispered as though I had done something good. Even when she was hurting she was trying to make me feel better. I knew then that maybe she and I had the potential to be an us.