He'd been prepared to hug and cuddle her and pinch her cheeks. But she'd cried when Mom had let Seth hold her, right after she and Dad got home, and then she'd cried even harder when she saw Pinky and the Brain on the TV. It'd been left to the babysitter to hold her, cooing, while Seth stood there, feeling anxious. The baby fretted in Amy's arms. All he could see of her was a wriggling white hat decorated with yellow duckies, and all he could hear was the tail end of a wail.
She was loud when she cried.
Mom went to go put her into the new crib while Dad got all the suitcases and presents out of the car. Mom paid Amy and put a frozen pizza into the oven. Seth hovered around the kitchen counter with half a peanut butter sandwich and uncertainty in his green eyes. "Why don't you watch her for a bit?" Dad suggested. "It'd be a good chance for you to meet her. We'll be right in."
So he'd turned the TV down and went into the nursery to go look. Mom was still there, looking at her. Seth put her arm around her waist and peered down.
He didn't know what he was supposed to feel, except that it was hard to love a baby when the baby didn't know who you were. She was nice looking, cute, like all babies. She kicked her legs restlessly and waved chubby fists in the air. Her crying had stopped - mostly, but she still looked red-faced and fussy and she was still whimpering pretty loud. It was weird. She was his little sister, and yet, today, she was just another baby. He'd grow to love her, right? She'd need a big brother to help her figure out what was what.
Mom was still smiling, but she was exhausted, like she was falling asleep on her feet. Seth leaned over and whispered, "Peek-a-boo!" He covered his eyes and spread his fingers. "Peeeek-a-boo!"
She ignored him. Hmph. He felt stupid, because a little baby was showing him up, and this wasn't a good feeling to have.
He chose a tiny blue-and-white bear. He hummed the Barney theme, and made it hop and skip along the rim of the crib in time with the song. The fuzzy teddy was wearing a black-and-white checkered bowtie. How could she not like that? The bear was adorable, even he had to admit that.
She made a soft little hiccup. It was really cute.
Mom brightened up, and his spirits rose. He put the teddy bear next to the baby's head, so she could look at it later, and reached for a rattle. Maybe she'd like to hear something different. He jiggled it experimentally, not too loud.
She didn't like that. She squeezed her eyes shut and her mouth turned down. Seth shifted from one foot to the other. He dropped the rattle into the crib, and as it bounced onto the mattress her whimpers got louder. The baby was still unhappy. What else could they do to make her happy to be here? He sighed, and Mom sighed, and she blearily reached in and picked her up.
"She likes music." Dad's voice filtered in from the doorway. "Not baby music." He padded into the room into his socks and put his arm around his son's shoulders.
"Not baby music?" Seth crinkled his brows. When they were babies, his cousins used to like nursery rhymes and Itsy-Bitsy-Spider, and he'd sung them about a gajillion times. It was weird, but Seth thought the baby's musical taste was pretty cool. It was like she was already her own little person.
Dad laughed. "You liked KISS. That's not weird, is it?" He reached around and rearranged a fold of soft duck blanky around her face. The baby whined. Mom carefully rubbed her back and made soothing noises at her.
Seth narrowed his eyes. "That's not weird! What music does she like?"
"Music sung by women, we've noticed. She falls asleep faster when it's playing." Dad smiled and booped the baby on the nose. She still looked fussy and Seth got a little scared - was she ever going to settle down? But Dad continued: "Her favorite is 'What's Love Got To Do With It.' She loves that one."
Seth poked a finger into her blankie and felt a little smile start to grow. "That's neat. Like she doesn't want to listen to normal stuff."
"Isn't that precious? I want her to be proud of being a woman," Mom said. "Little baby. I want you never to forget how strong you are."
Seth wrinkled his nose. Well, of course she shouldn't forget. She had Mom as her mom, and Dad as her dad. They had to go through a lot growing up, and yeah, they disagreed with Seth about a million times a month, but they'd never made him feel like he was powerless. "Duh. She should be proud of that. But uhhh..."
"What is it, honey?"
"What do I call her? I can't call her baby forever."
"I'd be okay with that," Dad said. "But she has a birth name, and we want her to have a fresh start. She has a new family."
"Umm... some families get all the kids' names to start with the same letter?"
"Trite and done," Mom sniffed. It was funny when she got mad over little things, especially when she got snobby with it. Seth would never dare say that to her face. "I like Emily, or Elizabeth. They're beautiful, classical names."
"All the girls at school are Emily. We've got Emily 1, 2, 3, and 4." Seth couldn't keep the boredness out of his voice. With a last name like theirs, you didn't get forgotten - although you got a lot of annoying questions. For himself, he liked that his last name was unique, even if the name didn't match his face.
"What about a more updated name? Ashley, or Jennifer?" Dad suggested. It looked like the baby frowned at Jennifer just then, which was hilarious. Seth was really starting to like her.
"Hannah? Stephanie? Your sister would like Stephanie."
"I don't want the same name in the family," Dad objected.
"Say," Seth said, inspired, "she likes music by girls. Who sings that song again, the one she likes?"
"Oh? Tina. Tina Turner. She's a strong, independent woman who's overcome a lot of hardship in her life."
The baby stopped whimpering. She gurgled. Mom bounced the baby a little, up and down. Dad's smile got wider.
His mom whispered it again: "Tina. Do you like Tina?"
She laughed. Her big brother's heart felt like it opened all its doors wide, wide open, and suddenly he wanted to dance around and sing, because he'd heard and seen babies in his family and on TV, but to hear a baby's laugh, from a baby who was your family, was, seriously, the best thing ever.
"That's it," Dad whispered. "Tina. Baby, you just chose your own name. Choose your own destiny one day. Don't let anyone stop you."
"I'll make sure she does," Seth said firmly. "We all will, I promise, Tina." The baby's eyes lit up, and she smiled. At him. It felt like a miracle. And when Seth re-told the story of Tina's name to all his friends at school, he made sure he said it.