Warnings: Blood, nongraphic gore, childish possessiveness, possible eventual slash/threesome slash, emotional Uchiha Itachi
--Start--
Naruto was an intelligent child. Despite what many of the villagers and ninja would like to think, it wasn't luck that had him surviving the lynch mobs, or the lax security of the ninja that let him paint the entire inside of ANBU HQ eyebleeding orange and pink.
Naruto was observant, smart, and not a little bit mischievous. He knew how to get past the ANBU, paint the inside, and get out without being caught for several hours. With that kind of intuitive learning and observation, its not hard to believe that he knew he had ANBU guards.
He still didn't know why, but Naruto knew that nearly the entire village and a good portion of the supposedly better educated shinobi forces hated and feared him. That was why he needed the guard, Jiji thought he couldn't live in peace without someone keeping the mobs away.
Naruto acted indignant and offended of course, as any boisterous child would when implied they were weak, but inside he was secretely grateful. At first he was glad that Jiji cared, but after a few months he was glad that his ANBU were the ones assigned to him. Weasel and Dog, that is. They leave him birthday presents (he knows because on his birthday two boxes wrapped in a pretty metallic orange paper were hidden in his room, smelling like clean fur, bird feathers, and a little bit of chocolate. He kept the wrapping paper hidden between his mattress and bed frame.), food, and even sometimes read him stories (henge'd as someone else of course, but they always smelled like bird feathers or clean fur, depending on who it was).
Naruto would even go so far as to say he loved his ANBU, leaving them gifts like origami and occasionally flowering or potted cuttings from his own plants to take home.
He occasionally managed to catch glimpses of them as he went about his day, Weasel had long black hair that looked really silky, and carried a sword on diagonally on his back. He was pretty short too, so he was likely only a few years older than Naruto. Dog had kinda long spiky silver hair, which he was sure would be shoulder length if something managed to hold it down. He carried his sword across the small of his back, and was taller and bigger than Weasel, so he was probably older as well. He thought they might have both been Uchiha, sometimes Weasel had red eyes peering from the eyeholes of his mask, but Dog's only showed when Naruto was in danger and only in one eye.
--
He traded gifts with his two ANBU for almost a year and a half before Weasel had shunshinned in one night, splattered with blood and smelling like tears. His mask was gone, revealing a distinctly Uchiha face with stress lines marking the sides of his nose and drying tear tracks clinging to his cheeks. His red eyes had a different shape inside them than usual, but Naruto was more worried about the way Weasel had knelt and clutched him in a crushing hug, hiding his face in his yellow hair and giving a shuddering gasp before pulling away and begging Naruto not to do anything rash tomorrow and to stay safe, whether he could come back or not. Weasel told him his name was Uchiha Itachi, and asked him to keep an eye on his brother Sasuke before stiffening and leaving as abruptly as he came, only sending an apologetic glance back.
Dog leapt through the window near immediately after, checking for enemies before rounding on Naruto and focusing on the bloodsplattered nightclothes with laser like focus. Naruto had to quickly reassure him that he was fine, but... deliberately acting scared that 'that guy' was going to come back, and begged Dog to stay. Dog sent a message to the ANBU waiting outside that it was all-clear, but he was going to remain behind to guard Naruto.
--
Naruto had learned to stop protesting Itachi's traitor status, it only made the villagers belligerence worse. Instead, he did smaller pranks on the people who were most vocal about it, things like using color change seal (Itachi had been teaching him small easily done seals before... well, something about him being an Uzumaki and finding it natural) to change the color of the building until it was painted over (cheaper for him, the seal could be done small and easily hidden, instead of wasting money on several buckets of paint he just had to buy a few ink stones a year and several sizes of brushes).
Naruto also kept an eye on Sasuke like Itachi asked him to do, acting as the air headed dense 'rival' to keep him from brooding too often if he could. And, one time while waiting in Jiji's office he got a peek at how the teams are formed, since most of his other teachers were determined to see him fail (Mizuki), or just didn't care beyond standard fairness and professionalism (Iruka), he decided to try stacking the teams by deliberately failing because Sasuke was on top in the grades department. After all, what better way to keep an eye on the 'last loyal Uchiha' than to be on the same team? Too bad Itachi's brother was an ass.
--End--
Or, AU where Naruto's got ANBU guards (Itachi and Kakashi) who become attached to eachother, Naruto becomes attached to a different Uchiha than Sasuke, and Kakashi is a little more involved in Naruto's life. This CAN be turned into slash, but not until Naruto is at least 15 (15 is still underaged, but its around that time that Akatsuki starts acting up for real and encountering Itachi without Kisame is more reasonable because Akatsuki started going after other jinchuuriki than Naruto, and since this prompt is when Naruto is about 5, it'd be way more than a little inappropriate and pedophilic which is no gonna fly for my prompts ever)
Tbh this could also be made into a Really-Possessive-Tearful-Child-Naruto fighting with Sarutobi about Inu and Itachi being reassigned because they're HIS AnBu and basically be a cute fluffy fic where Naruto tries to claim to all and sundry that Itachi and Inu are HIS with all the blunt determination of a five year old child stating facts of the freakin universe (it doesnt really help that he's pretty much a kitsune ANYWAY, what with being born from a kyuubi container and then being a jailor for the thing himself, something other than chakra had to stick) and continues to doggedly pursue his Itachi and Inu throughout the years (coincidentally managing to defuse the entire coup situation) and probably marries them both when he's like 18.