Author's note: Hey there guys, this is my first hetalia fan-fiction and my second one ever. My first fanfiction was a Shadow/Amy fanfiction I never completed and may never do, due to loss of interest.
This is a fanfiction where America dies ad you can take this as being placed in the future about 30 years from now, but countries don't age much. Anyways what happens is America makes a full recovery and it's economy is actually doing great and is bustling with activity when some other countries decide to crash this economy once more and steal supplies and basically claim a sort of war amongst America, long story short America doesn't die but stops existing period , or the country does, and this obviously will cause Alfred to die and this fanfiction wills how how mainly Ivan handles the loss of the country and man he fell in love with and had melted his icy heart and made him a nicer person.
This first chapter has a few flashbacks and some basic information on how he is handling it and as the chapter go on, you'll get the sad pleasure of watching America die in a long or possibly separated flash backs from Russia's mind as he remembers the past few months and how he discovers all this drama and blah blah I'm not giving you the full details on right now.
Ivan is not his usual dark-themed self that he is often depicted as for the most part in this fanfiction, so don't expect too much of it. You read by your own will, I don't make you read anything.
This will contain yaoi at some points in Ivan's flashbacks and blah blah and I'll have some horribly sappy moments and some sad moments and other just stupid/cute moments. So yeah, be ready for it.
I gave this an m rating, there is a warning in this note, and I told you, you read at/on your own will and risk, do not complain to me, ever. Thanks ciao~
PS the more reviews and faster I'm reviewed, the more I update and frequently. I live off reviews~
Ivan didn't remember how exactly he had gotten on the floor with a bloody Arthur Kirkland beneath him, all he knew was that his eyes did not deceive him as he came back to reality, tighten fist loosening though his mouth still screamed to the man below him. "You killed him Arthur, you betrayed him and destroyed him! Your son, how could you kill your own son, you bastard! Get out1 get out of his home right now!" His voice frantic and his purple eyes burning as the wetness of tears rolled down his cheeks, a Terrified France and Canada pulled the Russian male off of England finally and restrained him as England coughed and curled for a moment holding his bloodied face. Tears were soon seen and Russia almost snapped again "Don't you dare! Don't you dare cry you treacherous bastard! Because of you Alfred is gone! And so is his whole damn country! I'll kill you! I swear it!" the Russian snarled at the male as England let out his own sobs. Russia's tears were no doubt that of sorrow, loss, hurt, and dismay, but those words didn't even begin to describe how broken he felt, and finally the strong nation fell to his knees, just letting the tears roll free and not even bothering with destroying the man he blamed for this." Now…now Alfred is gone, and none of us, will ever see his smile again." He had a weak smile; purple eyes looked up to green eyes as he watched the other's tears flow. "Just when I thought you others weren't so bad, when I believed him, you all betrayed him and killed him, and for what, some supplies, things he would have given you all to willingly now if only you'd have asked. His military, his support, his everything, but instead you bastards did this, you murder him in such a horrid way. Get out, get out now, before you're the next nations to disappear off the grid." He demanded the last part and glared at Arthur who got up and as he went to speak an apology that could never take this act back Ivan snarled and demanded once more which had a worried France dragging out England and a dismayed Canada who had yet to know everything following behind him. Ukraine coming up behind her brother she sighed some, she had long since cried for the loss of her brother and while she was on the verge of tears once more, she told herself to be strong and knelt down in front of her brother.
Arms embracing the man, he was hesitant in the least to hold her and break into his tears, to actually show emotions he was sure he'd have never let out again, something he had swore long ago that now didn't even come to mind as he wept into his sister's chest. "My dear Vanya, my poor poor Vanya…." She whispered lowly, her face nuzzling into her brother's hair. Belarus, though she had thought she'd be excited at America's presence being gone, found even herself disturbed as they found out a harsh truth. How could they do that to him, they were his family, and they attacked his country so ruthlessly, and then when many nations were missing form a world meeting, passed a cruel judgment from him and took his title away as a nation and country and left him to rot. Twas a fate even Belarus found to cruel to pass on someone. Kneeling down as did the other sister she rubbed Ivan's back some. "I wish I could say it be alright Ivan…. But….I'm sorry… I'm sorry we couldn't do anything." And Ivan just sobbed and cried hard into his sister's embrace and the words of the other, and he could still here that damned male's voice in his head, every time they had ever argued, talked, or just been together, all of it was coming in horrid flashbacks he'd wish just stop. His sunflower, his precious sunflower was gone, not even wilted, but gone, completely vanished form existence.
-========FlashBack=======-
"Promise me!" A feisty blonde demanded as he leaned forward in the ash-blonde's lap, blue eyes searching the other's purple one's for a hesitant response. " What?" Ivan asked the other with an amused smirk. "You have to promise me, You're gonna be my Arch-Nemesis when I get older. Every hero needs one; I may be small now, but just wait till I get older! I'll be an awesome hero and you have to be my Arch-Nemesis. Promise me!" the smaller blonde demanded. "But Alfred, we are comrades, why would I be your enemy?" he asked still amused by the smaller male's demands. "Because you're my best friend, and everyone knows the hero's best friend always ends up being his enemy in the end! Duh! That's just common sense." He stated as if it was the most obvious fact in the world. " But-" " No Buts about it mister, you have to promise" "can I help you out sometimes against a common foe still and occasionally still be your friend." "Hmm, maybe, we'll see if that happens." He gave a toothy smile to the other that almost made his cold heart melt, such a young nation, so naive and innocent, oh how much pain this child still had to learn about. "Fine. I Promise" Ivan gave into the younger Alfred who beamed at the agreement. "Really! Awesome, I totally have the coolest enemy and best friend in the whole universe! We are gonna be so awesome, history will never forget us and so, we'll never die!" he laughed happily.
-======End FlashBack======-
Ivan's purple eyes burst open and he realized he had fallen asleep crying, somehow he ended up in Alfred's bed, he figured his sisters must have gotten Germany and some of the other male countries at America's home to help get him to bed, this being the only actual one in his house now or days since after a few months back America just wanted to be alone and spend as much time as he could with Ivan and a few select others, such as Canada. Though poor Canada didn't even know his brother had been dying the whole time till it was too late. The Russian rolled on his side in the bed, Those famous glasses of America's sitting on his bedside table, a large hand reach for them and grabbed them, bringing them close to him. They were a little dirty, but nothing to bad.
Ivan's nose inhaling the scent of the bed, for it still smelled like him. A hand putting the glasses on the pillow, he let the now free hand gently run along the sheets where if he was still here, America would no doubt still be laying here right now, just waking up, and smiling at Ivan like he did so many morning before. That's when his eyes caught it, a glimpse of something rather bright yellow and he picked up the curly strand of what was known as hair. Alfred's as well, it made him smile. That man was so obsessed with his hair it was almost a sin to be that obsessed. And when he had started to fade and age, he remembered Alfred freaking as he started to shed more than his shaggy locks already did naturally. But, he had always been so cheerful and happy even when he knew it wasn't a funny sign.
Sitting up, the well built man dropped the hair and picked the glasses up once more and brought them to the bathroom with him. Spotless, something not to be expected by America, but, in times of danger, one needed to be ready for anything, and so Alfred kept everything clean and nice for when ever he'd go he wouldn't leave the place a wreck. Looking into the mirror Ivan froze dead in his tracks. There was carved in the glass, something only Alfred would do, a small note to Ivan.
To my wonderful love, Vanya
"I love you Ivan. More than the adventures I had, more then the dreams I made known, more than my crazy ideas and my obsession with my hair. I love you, and the way you hold me at night, and the times when you spend the day with me just to be around me, and how you call me, your little sunflower. I'm no poet, but, promise me, Arch-Nemesis of mine, that, you'll forever love this sunflower to. You'll not get mad at him when he calls you Vanya and tried to tell you he loves you in Russian and messes up, and that when he's really stupid, you'll help him stay in line, just like you and my friends always do, because… you love me too, right?" – Your pretty sunflower, Alfred.
He remembered the morning he woke up to find no Alfred in the bed and went in the bathroom to check for him and found this, they had gotten into a fight the night before and went to sleep on bad terms, after that night, they hadn't seen each other for a week, but, when they got back together they had been more than passionate enough the next few following days to make up for it. Ivan held a sad smile as he put his hands on the words etched into the right side of the mirror, the left side completely un-marred, he could almost feel Alfred's embrace around his waist, the thinner arms, the smaller frame pressed against his, the other leaning over to the side, smiling at Ivan as he was either shaving or brushing his teeth, asking his usual stupid questions of the morning.
Taking a shower he headed down stairs dressed in loose jeans held up by a black belt and a very loose knit-sweater Ukraine and America made him together. America designed the sunflowers pattern, and Ukraine knitted it into the sweater Alfred envisioned, he did rather love the sweater too. His usual scarf around his neck and socks the only thing on his feet he was greeted that morning by Japan and a few other countries that would no doubt be staying awhile to mourn the male and make sure Ivan was taken care of. "Russia-san, are you feeling alright this morning?" Japan inquired calmly and Ivan nodded. "D-da, sorry about yesterday, I just… Lost control, anyways, can you go do me a favor and put this with his things, I found them by his side of the bed." He spoke softly to the male who had surprisingly enough grown fond of, thanks to the bubbly blond that was missing from this picture, not like he had a choice at first, Alfred was a rather demanding man at times and when it came to his friends he was even more demanding and worse, protective, which Ivan never lied, made him jealous. Handing the glasses to Japan, the Asian seemed to sadden a bit at the sight of them as if he remembered the male who use to were them as if he had just disappeared yesterday, nodding he bowed for a moment excusing himself to go place this with the small shrine they had made in memory of the man.
-====Flashback ====-
"We are defiantly not planting the sunflowers right there!" The blond piped in to Ivan. "Oh? Why not?" "Well there isn't enough sun during the evening for them, the house will shade them too much and they'll wither before fall or winter even has time to make them go bad. You gotta plant them here. I learned this from France and Spain, they really like flowers, well roses actually, but, they said most flowers need lots of sun to bloom properly, and if you plant them that close to the house they'll get a lot more shade than sun, and they are called 'sun-flowers' so I'm pretty sure they need lots of sun." he stated matter-of-factly, with an uncertain nod that showed he was a bit unsure of how his logic worked all the way for everything but he was pretty sure they were right facts. "Besides, it won't be good luck if your peace gift wilts before spring or summer is over. We are finally on good terms politically, therefore we have to make sure the peace gift is taken care of, come on, lets got stand on the porch and figure out a pattern to plant them in away from the shade so they look awesome, but not as awesome as me, alright?" He gave a small pout and the Russian simply smiled at first. "Of course not, no sunflower could be more beautiful…and awesome… then my Alfred, da?" Strong arms pulling the bright blond closer to the ash blond he laughed some. "Your not a good romance country, but that's alright, I like your attempts anyways." He playfully teased the other verbally who simply enjoyed the embrace of the other. "Say you love me, Ivan…" This though caught the Russian off-guard and he gave him a questioning look. "Don't give me that look, just say it, please?" Ivan was still hesitant to respond and didn't say the words. "Alfred is something wrong?" the blond shrugged out of the Russian male's embrace and his shoulders slumped some. "No, not really, I just wanted to hear you say it, I've been thinking lately, and I'd like to hear you tell me it more often, that's all."
That was the first lie the Russian had caught and knew something had gone terribly wrong. Alfred usually never needed reassurance unless something was really wrong. While they had not be politically at peace for the past decades and such, they had still be close through the good and bad and even through the wars, they had some amazing hate sex, but, they never had too many bad problems that they couldn't tell to the other off political terms, just as people, just as themselves, they talked, every last one of the countries did, maybe not with everyone, but with select people they trusted. Purple eyes looked at him slightly worried before he walked up to the other who had distance himself form the other a little and stared blankly into the expanse of land in front of their secluded home for vacations. Pulling the other to turn and face him, his hands went to both of Alfred's shoulders and the brighter hair blond held his face down. When Ivan felt a shudder he lifted up the other's face to see tears streaming down his face and the other looking away, biting his lip before quietly sobbing " P-please say it to me…." He almost begged and Ivan frowned pulling his smaller lover close and leaning down, kissing him passionately, letting Alfred cry into the kiss and then move into a comforting embrace once it broke. "I love you, Alfred F. Jones. I always will." And that day, was the first day he had seen Alfred ever break to such words and seem so fragile.
-=== End FlashBack ===-
Letting out a sigh the male pressed onward into the kitchen where his sisters greeted him along with a cheery façade Italy who was cooking food for everyone, pasta, go figure. "Good morning Russia! Feeling better, ve~?" He asked in a energetic voice, Ivan smiled and walked past the brunette male, patting his head. "Da, a bit, thank you for cooking by the way." Italy offered him a smile and nod before verbal response being shy as usual. " I-i-it's nothing, really. It's just some pasta, s-sorry I couldn't fix you something you like more." He stated calmly and Russia actually smiled for the first time since Alfred's 'death', like actually smiled. "No, it's fine. Where is Toris, I haven't seen him all morning." "I'm r-right here, Ivan." He spoke nervously. Sometimes the past will haunt you forever, or maybe your past actions will haunt another forever especially when around you. Russia learned this easily with Lithuania, who was still to this day, nervous around him even though he'd become a much kinder man over the years with Alfred on good terms. "Would you be so kind and come with me on a walk later?" he asked politely to the shy and what he considered to be 'Paranoid beyond all repair' male who quickly nodded his head in agreement which made him chuckle some. "Don't be so tense, I won't hurt you." "O-okay" the male quickly responded before walking off and Ukraine popped in calmly. "Are you going to go visit that place?" She asked calmly and Russia nodded. "I never got to go with him again before he got to sick, I'd like to go visit it, but, not alone, or else I might not come back." He muttered the last part and Ukraine sighed. "Alright, if that is your wish my brother, just, please, be careful… The weather has been a bit whacky since last week when… you know…. So, tread the waters with caution, da?" "Da." Was all he responded before he was given food by the Italian as he served everyone and was sure to eat to make sure no one started to worry about his health.