Glitter Parade... of Doom!


Wow, I'm doing a musical where I'm not borrowing the plot from somewhere else! Well, I'm going to be parodying plot points from most of the movie musicals ever made, so that's not precisely true, but I'll let that slide. Anyway, this should be fun, especially once the story really picks up steam. One side note: since it's basically required, there will be a pseudo-romantic storyline, but I am not using central characters and will try to make it as feasible as possible, with nobody really acting out of character. Anyway, enjoy!

Fade in on the Massive. The Tallest, who are having soda and curly fries, are talking to Tak via a videophone.

Tak: ...wasn't my fault! I should be an Invader! I SHOULD...

Red: Too bad. You'll just have to take your new assignment... Toodles!

Tak: But...

Red hits a remote control and the screen goes blank.

Red: I always love doing that...

Purple: Hey! These fries are stale!

Almost instantly, half a dozen Irkens come with plates of fries.

Purple: Uh, never mind... I'm not hungry anymore.

The Irkens walk away dejectedly. Purple sits on the sofa.

Purple: Being Tallest rocks!

Red: Indeed... every creature in the empire is willing to make a fool of himself just to win our favor...

Purple: And we get candy...

Red: And our subjects listen to anything we say...

Purple: And potato chips...

Red: Even if it makes them look like total morons!

Purple: And sandwiches!

Red: Yup, we really lucked out!

Music begins to play in the background.

Tallest! (http://www.broadwaymidi.com/down/BugsyMalone-BadGuys.mid or http://www.content.loudeye.com/scripts/hurlPNM.exe?/~ttt-600005/0172899_0107_07_0002.ra)
Both: We could've had any fate in Irk's society,
We could be shrimpy and small.
That would be sucky,
But we both got lucky!
We became unusually tall!

We could've had any fate in Irk's society,
But now we rule over all!
Our reign's been merry,
And quite arbitrary,
But we love being Almighty Tallest!

Red: We act just as we please!
And when we wish for something,
Everyone tries to appease!
Both: Tallest!

Purple: Whenever we rule,
All our subjects follow us,
Being Tallest is so cool!

Both: We've got an empire at our beck and call!
We're the very best at being tall!

We could've had any fate in Irk's society;
We're so glad that we lucked out!
With little training,
We got great at reigning!
For this job, we both fit the bill;
Since giving orders is our skill!

We could've had any fate in Irk's society,
We could be shrimpy and small.
But we're well suited
To being saluted!
We're the very best at being tall!
We're the very best at being tall!
We're the very best at being tall!

Red: Hey... this gives me an idea...

Fade out.