(A/N):

Hello everybody :)
I felt like writing something funny, and what is funnier than a drunk Lee? Right! A drunk Lee and a drunk Neji!'
Well at least I hope that it is funny ^^'''
Anyway, *cough* enjoy :)

And still English is not my first laguage so be nice :D

Disclaimer: If I would own Naruto there weren't so much fillers!

"Spandex-wearing freak!"
"White-eyed weirdo!"
*gasp* "How dare you insulting the Hyuga-eyes?!"

Gai watched two boys, namely Rock Lee and Hyuga Neji, insulting each other in rather loud voices. He sighed in despair. Gai didn't even really know how it had happened but right now both Neji and Lee were drunk. They had been on a mission together to observe an enemy shinobi, and had waited for Tenten to arrive and apparently Neji had drunk a few spiked drinks. Lee had thought about it like a challenge and had ordered a huge amount of alcohol. Gai was ashamed about himself. If he had paid more attention he wouldn't be in this situation.
"Tenten thinks this spandex is weird too!", Neji said huffily. Gai gasped in shock. Why should their beautiful flower think badly about the YOUTHFULL spandex?
"You are a liar Hyuga Neji! My flower thinks this spandex is YOUTHFULL!" Lee raised his voice even more and his flushed face grew even redder in anger.
"YOUR flower? How dare you, you… you unyouthfull FREAK! She is MINE so back off!" Gai gasped in shock that Neji had the nerve to call Lee UNYOUTHFULL. But Lee seemed to miss this insult.
"YOURS? Since when is our flower YOURS? Nobody owns her and especially not YOU! She is Gai-sensei's and mine!" Apparently Lee missed the fact that he contradicted himself too. Neji's voice reached an unHyuga-like high tune. "SHE IS MINE! JUST LEAVE YOU UNYOUTHFULL WEIRDO!" Lee pointed at Neji, his huge brows furrowed in anger. "THAT'S IT! YOU WANNA HAVE IT?" Gai opened his mouth in shock. He had to do something, after all Lee was drunk and nobody was able to stop him if he gets started when he was drunk. And Neji surely wouldn't admit defeat to Lee. But it was too late. Lee rammed his feet in the floor and shot in an unbearable speed towards Neji and… missed him just to attack an innocent table. "HERE TAKE THAT! WUUUUHOOOOO! FIRST LOTUS!" The poor table cracked into two and so Lee continued to 'kill' the plates and the foot. "Lee...", Gai started but was interrupted by a female voice. "Gai-sensei! What the hell is Lee doing?" "Tenten! Ohh my youthful flower you have to help me!" Gai cried and pointed toward Lee who punched the third table to fragments. "HERE TAKE THAT! SHE IS NOT YOURS", he yelled while he threw the leg of the table against the wall. A few customers ran away in fear. "Gai-sensei, is Lee DRUNK?!" Gai nodded and suddenly he looked at Tenten. "By the way Tenten, since when are you Neji's?" Her eyes went large in confusion. "Since when am I WHAT?" "Ah Tenten", Neji approached them with a happy expression on his face. "Come on tell this FREAK", he pointed at a plate, "that you are MINE!" Tenten stared at him in shock and confusion, her mouth wide open. "Gai-sensei, is Neji drunk too!?" Gai nodded and tears streamed down his face. A loud clash made them look at Lee again who had thrown a table in a window. Suddenly he looked at them. "THERE YOU ARE! THIS TIME I WILL GET YOU! SECOND GATE, OPEN!" Tenten took a few steps backwards and dragged Neji with her, who still glared at the poor, innocent plate. Before Lee could attack them, or rather Neji, a waiter approached him. "S-sir, would you please leave? You are scaring our customers." "YOU WANNA HAVE IT TOO?"
"Tenten, bring Neji back to the Hyuga compound! I'll stop Lee." Tenten looked at Gai and then at the flushed Neji and then back at Lee, who made a weird dance, punching a few chairs and tables. One of his hands waved the whole time in the air. Stop Lee or face Hyuga Hiashi with a drunken Neji. She shrieked when Lee jumped at them and dogged just in time. "Okay, I'll take Neji. See ya, Gai-sensei." 'If you'll survive this, that's the thing.' She added in her mind. The bun-haired girl walked over to Neji who had started to insult the plate. "Neji, come on we are leaving." Neji ignored her and continued to 'talk'. "Neji! Move your ass over here, or I'll make you feel sorry!" That caught his attention and he turned around with an angry expression on his face. But it changed to happiness when he saw Tenten. "Tenten!" He walked to her and pointed at the plate. "Did you see? I finished him! He didn't even make a tune at the end!" Neji looked utterly proud and grinned like a schoolboy. Tenten sweat dropped. "S-sure, let's just head home, okay?" Neji nodded eagerly and dragged her out of the restaurant. At the door he turned once again and grinned superior at the plate. "See? She's mine!"

(A/N):
So, you think it's funny? I am not sure myself ^^
I am actually thinking if I would make a second chapter at the Hyuga compound. Nah, we'll see :D
Anyway, liked it? Hate it? Want to hit me with a chair?
Let me know :)