This chapter is now edited and improved for your viewing pleasure! No minor changes, just some different wording and stuff.
This is the first fanfiction I have ever written that I'm letting people see. So feel lucky! I guess.
This is technically a crossover between Hetalia and an actual published book called Love in the Time of Global Warming, but the book isn't too famous and you don't need to have read it to enjoy my story so it's under Hetalia. (I don't even know if there is fanfiction for LTGW on here!) In fact, please don't think you have to go read the book just to get my story. I would like you to read my story now instead of wasting time with something else.
That didn't come out right.
Anyway, enjoy!
In the summer, when the hot and dry Los Angeles days got too much to bear, my eldest brother would take us out for ice cream. That may not seem too special, but in my family we hardly ever got treats like that.
The Kirkland household was made up of four boys and one girl. None of them were over the age of thirty. And, sadly, I was the female. Before I got my driver's license, every time I needed to go shopping for new clothes Amos and Dylan would argue until they were blue in the face about who had to take me. Usually Dylan had the upper hand, considering the fact that he had stolen a car when he was thirteen and still wasn't fully trusted around automobiles.
Then when Peter needed help with homework, Amos would be at work or making dinner, Dylan would be studying like the straight-A student he was, and Bryan would just sit on his lazy ass and tell me to do it because "I'm a girl and am therefore smarter and can be of more help when it comes to maths."
In all honesty, I really didn't mind helping Peter. Even though he didn't like me, and stated it to my face multiple times, I couldn't help but think of him as a little angel. With his adorably large eyebrows and childish grin, it was surprising that he didn't have many friends. And when he came home covered in mud, a large ugly bruise mingling with the freckles on his cheek, I was the one to cradle his head in my lap and whisper sweetly in his ear that everything was going to be okay.
Still, after the mark was gone, he acted as if nothing had happened and went back to playing softball or reading about sharks or doing whatever it was he was most interested in at the time. Ignoring me, and ignoring the pain. And late at night, when I knew he was already asleep, I would slip into his room and check on him. Just to make sure he was okay.
One night when I came in he was having a nightmare. I crawled into the bed with him and shook him slightly to wake him up. I asked him what the dream was about, but he wouldn't give me many details. All he said was that the giants had ended the world. Then he asked me if the world would end soon. There was so much innocence in his voice that I could hardly believe he was the same kid as the little brother who had not-so-lovingly nicknamed me 'Miss Jerk'.
Weaving my pale fingers through his sandy-blond hair, I answered, of course not. That no matter what he dreamed, he was safe here with his siblings, in their little house on the cliff by the sea. Then he smiled, closed his eyes, and went back to sleep. I don't think he even remembered that night.
xX-+-Xx
It was the autumn Amos lost his job that things started going downhill. I was fourteen years old and Peter was only eight. Saying my legal guardian's job was steady would be a lie, but it had been enough to keep the family going once our parents died. But when he came home with the bad news, things started to change. Dylan and Bryan got part-time jobs, but Amos didn't even try to find work again.
Instead, he started drifting away from the rest of us. He spent almost all of his time in our father's old study in the basement. None of us ever went down there to see what he was doing, and he never told us. He left Bryan, Dylan, and myself to make meals and care for Peter. Mostly I tried to care for Peter as I am completely useless when it comes to cooking. Our grades started to drop. This led to more time spent studying, and less time spent just hanging around. But it seemed that my two friends wouldn't let that happen.
Amelia and Madeline. Two bright shining stars in my darkening sky. The centers of their own different universes. Amelia was loud and strong. Her smile was contagious and her wonderful, beautiful eyes were always wide with fascination at the world around her. We'd been friends since I was very young. I met her only a week after my family had moved to America from the UK. And like all old friends, we had our arguments. I told her all the time that she was too obnoxious and that she annoyed me. But really, I wanted nothing more than to be by her side all of the time.
Madeline I met shortly after Amelia. She was actually Amelia's twin sister, but they were quite easy to tell apart since Maddie's hair was wavier and longer and she wore different glasses. She was also the polar opposite of her sister. Quiet and incredibly shy, she took a while to warm up to me. But once she did, I discovered how unbelievably kind and caring she was. When I needed a shoulder to cry on, I went straight to her. She had a love for plush toys and maple trees, and Amelia and I always joked that she was so calm she could tame a polar bear.
They never let me turn down an invitation to a party, and hung out with me every day after school. I started sleeping over at their house a lot, and their single mom was hardly ever home to complain. We would all lie on Amelia's bed, gossiping about the boys at school. Me in my father's old Union Jack tee-shirt, Maddie in her ruffly blue nightdress, and Amelia, with her hair fanned out around her head like a golden shimmering halo, in old boxer shorts and a stained camisole that just amplified her natural beauty.
In the morning, Madeline would cook pancakes while I made tea and tried to help Amelia with the homework she had forgotten to do the previous night. We'd walk to school together and chat about what interesting things had been going on in our lives. But most mornings the trip to school was spent in silence, as we already knew what was going on around each other. Most afternoons I took the bus home, only stayed long enough to grab extra clothes and check up on my siblings, then went straight back to the twin's place.
One time when I came back to Maddie and Amelia's place, I opened the door to find them rushing around styling their hair and putting dresses on. Amelia informed me that they had received invitations to a party at Tom's house. Apparently, it was going to be a huge event and almost everyone at the school was invited. Well, all of the cool kids. I guess that included Amelia and Madeline but not me? It wasn't really too big of a surprise. I was Rose, the girl who read the encyclopedia for fun, after all.
Maddie asked me if I was okay with them going without me. Usually the three of us did everything together. But I smiled and told them they should enjoy themselves. They didn't need to worry about me. Really, I didn't want them at Tom's house. Sure, he was popular, but that definitely didn't mean he was a good person. I caught him smoking weed behind the school once, but I didn't tell anyone. I also knew that his older brother was a heavy drinker.
But who was I to tell my friends not to have fun? Surely they wouldn't have listened to me anyway.
I sat patiently while they finished preparing themselves. Madeline was using way too much hairspray. (That must have been eating away at the ozone as we spoke!) Amelia was using too much mascara. I told her that she didn't need any makeup to be beautiful, but she just gave me a funny look and continued as if the compliment had been a bad joke. She probably assumed it was.
A few hours later, I was back at my own home in my own room and my phone dinged. Picking it up, I saw that I had received a photo via text. It was a selfie of Maddie. Her glasses were gone and her hair was undone and hanging loosely around her shoulders. In the background I could see a table set with bottles of beer. This worried me, but I convinced myself that my friends were too responsible to get drunk. A few more minutes and I received another picture. In this one Amelia was dancing under strobe lights, a small tear in her stockings unnoticed.
Over the course of the next few hours, I got several more photos. Tom kissing some girl I think I recognized from school, Amelia draped over the top of a couch already full of party-goers, a swimming pool with glitter in it, and Madeline drinking. At that point I turned off my phone and put it down, switching off my room's light and getting into bed. I didn't want to think of the sweet and kind girl I had known for years indulging in alcohol.
It was around midnight and I still hadn't been able to fall asleep. I lay awake thinking that it was my fault. I shouldn't have let them go. Then I was startled by my phone going off again. Reaching over and turning it on, I found that it was another picture. It was of Amelia, making out with a boy who looked four years older than her. I had never seen him before in my life. His hand was on her ass and in the background the same table as before could be seen, now completely empty.
I felt sick. I wanted to get up and go straight to that party. I wanted to kill that stranger who thought he could touch MY Amelia. I wanted to drag my friends out of there and force water and pills down their throats until they were sober. But more than anything, I wanted to hold Amelia close and tell her that everything was going to be okay. To run my fingers through her hair and smell her strawberry perfume. I wanted to make sure that no one touched her ever again. No one but me. Instead, I threw my phone at the wall, buried my head in my pillow, and cried myself to sleep.
xX-+-Xx
The three of us never mentioned the party to each other, and I was fine with that. But something had changed. I noticed it in the way that I tried to steer clear of our usual boy gossip, and when Amelia started going out with the cute exchange student, I started arguing with her about how she deserved better. When Maddie came home one day with weed, I smoked it with them, just to not feel left out. I knew it was wrong. It was so, so wrong. But I wanted to do whatever it took to be closer to them. Especially Amelia.
That night I made sure to remove all evidence of my illegal habits before walking home. I climbed the steep road to my house along the ocean, the waves crashing on the rocks below. When I got to the front door, I unlocked it and stepped inside. But before I even made it to the kitchen, I heard shouting coming from the basement. Creeping towards the stairs, I listened in. The voices belonged to Amos and Dylan. Apparently, Amos had been using our dwindling money to collect nonperishable foods and gallons of water.
Amos was trying to explain himself, claiming that the end was near and that they needed those supplies to survive. Dylan was furious. There were better things to spend the money on! We needed A HOUSE to survive! And we were going to lose it if Amos didn't pull his shit together and try to find a job again! Amos rambled on and on about the apocalypse and conspiracy theories, Dylan begging him to stop hiding in Dad's old study and get a therapist. I couldn't listen anymore. Running upstairs to my room crying, I thanked god that Peter and Bryan weren't home to hear it.
xX-+-Xx
The next morning, I woke to the smell of delicious food. This had become unusual around the Kirkland house. Amos was really the only one who could properly cook, and in the morning we usually just ate cereal. Curiosity overpowering my fatigue, I quietly slipped downstairs. Amos was in the kitchen making pancakes, humming an old Scottish folk song. Peter was sitting at the table, swinging his legs and squirming, impatiently waiting for the food to be ready.
My eldest brother chatted and laughed with us, acting as if he had never lost his job and distanced himself from us. It was strange to say the least, but Peter was happy and therefore so was I. That was when Amos suggested we go out for ice cream. It had been almost a year since the last time we had done that. Peter's sea blue eyes were so wide they were almost comical. For just a few hours, I thought that maybe everything was going to be okay.
But that afternoon when Dylan and Bryan got home from their jobs, things started getting darker again. Dylan and Amos got into another fight, although this time it was in hushed voices so none of us could hear. While I was pretty sure the argument was because Amos had continued his 'collection', Peter and Bryan didn't know what to think. Their good moods were ruined just as effectively as mine, though. To add to the problems, Peter was having nightmares again. And that time, he wouldn't let me help.
As time went on, I felt like I was in a rut. My sixteenth birthday came and went, and autumn turned to winter for the second time since my big brother had lost his job. I was old enough to work, and managed to get a job at a music store. The pay was minimum wage, but it did help the family. Madeline and Amelia (mostly Amelia) were upset when I told them I didn't want a sweet sixteen party. I stated that I had grown out of the idea of birthday parties, but they managed to get me to spend the day partying with them at least.
Amelia's sixteenth birthday was another story. She hosted a party so large it might as well have been called a festival. Maddie sent invitations to everyone between the ages of fifteen and twenty in the area. I'm pretty some some party-goers were older or younger that that age range, and I'm positive that not all who showed up were invited. They had rented out the nearby country club, and I think it still wasn't able to fit everyone. There was a huge stage, and Amelia was going to walk out onto it near the beginning of the party.
Backstage a minute before she was going to go on, the two of us were all alone. Madeline had to check on something leaving me to deal with her extremely nervous twin. Amelia was fretting over everything from her makeup to the catering service. I told her to calm down. She was beautiful. And with her eyes as blue as a summer sky and her body of a model, it was true. She asked me if I really thought so. To answer, I leaned in and kissed her. On the lips. It was just a peck, less than a second. She laughed, asking me what I was doing. Just like with the mascara all of those months ago, it was just a joke to her.
xX-+-Xx
Amos, the brother who kept smiling and taking his siblings out for ice cream even when he was losing his mind. Peter, the little angel who got bullied and wouldn't let anyone help. Madeline and Amelia. Amelia and Maddie. The loving and caring girl who started drinking and doing drugs at the age of fourteen and the goddess who thought my admittedly questionable affections for her were just a joke.
That night after the party, I went home and cried myself to sleep, something I had been doing quite a lot recently. Before I drifted off I thought to myself, Is my heart breaking? Is this what it feels like? Well, I can answer my past self now. No. My heart was not breaking. No matter how bad I thought things were, they could have gotten better. Everything was still okay. But now?
It's not.
Because even if back then my brothers, angel, friend, and goddess weren't perfect, at least they were still alive.
What's that? Why yes, I did just kill off Scotland, Wales, Northern Ireland, Sealand, Canada, and America in the prologue.
Sorry about that!