"Whoa," Kevin breathed, looking down at the angel tablet. Sam looked up from his book at Kevin's voice.
"What is it?" Sam asked. Kevin shook his head and let out a shocked laugh.
"I figured out the last ingredient to Metatron's trails...and why it had to be Cas," Kevin said. Sam's eyebrows went up.
"Really? That's awesome!" Sam exclaimed excitedly, standing up. "Dean! Cas!" Kevin's eyes widened and he shook his head frantically, causing Sam to give him a confused look. "What?" Sam asked.
"Um, it's just-" Kevin started, but was cut off by Dean coming into the room, Cas not far behind him.
"What is it?" Dean asked. Kevin took a deep breath.
"This is gonna be awkward," Kevin muttered under his breath.
"What?" Dean asked.
"Nothing. I, um, found out what the last ingredient to Metatron's spell was," Kevin said, hesitantly. Dean's eyebrows furrowed.
"Isn't it just an angel's grace?"
"Yeah, but it's a certain type of angel's grace," Kevin explained. Cas tilted his head. Sam and Dean stared at Kevin expectantly. Kevin looked over at Cas apologetically and took a deep breath. "It's the grace of an angel in love with a human." Dean's eyebrows shot up at that. Both Sam's and Kevin's eyes turned to look at Dean. Cas's face with filled with a mixture of shock, fear, and embarrassment. Dean noticed both Sam and Kevin staring at him and furrowed his brows.
"Why are you looking at me?" Dean asked. "I'm not the one that he-" Dean started, but Sam and Kevin both cut him off by giving him a of-course-you-are-the-one-you-idiot look. Cas was taking shallow breaths now and looked like a deer in the headlights. Sam shifted eyes to give Cas a worried look.
"Cas...?" Sam asked in concern. Cas looked over, face filled with fear and embarrassment and swiftly walked out of the room. Kevin sighed guiltily and Sam quickly turned to look at Dean. Dean immediately scoffed and let out a small laugh.
"Oh, come on! You can't honestly think that I'm the one that he's in love with," Dean said, exasperated.
"You didn't hear him denying it did you?" Sam asked.
"He wasn't saying much of anything," Dean argued. Sam rolled his eyes.
"Do you really need us to list all the reasons why we know he's in love with you?" Sam asked. It was Dean's turn to roll his eyes.
"Like what?" Dean asked. Kevin chuckled.
"This will probably take a while," Kevin said. Dean threw him an annoyed look.
"Okay," Sam started and Dean looked over at Sam with a humor filled expression. "Number one, the amount of times he's rebelled heaven for you is astounding." Dean opened his mouth to object, but Sam stopped him, "Reason number two," Sam said holding up two fingers. "When you and Cas were in the crypt and he was under Naomi's control, what is it that broke that connection?" Sam asked with a pointed look. Dean swallowed.
"Me, but-" Dean started, but Sam cut him off.
"And what is it that you said to Cas that finally broke the connection?" Sam asked. Dean shifted, all humor from his face gone. Sam raised an eyebrow when Dean didn't answer.
"It doesn't matter," Dean retorted. Sam shrugged.
"Well if it doesn't matter then why don't you just tell us?" Sam asked. Dean glared at his younger sibling. Sam had asked him this question a few times, but Dean would never tell him, saying it wasn't important. He couldn't believe he had said himself, but all his feelings had come pouring out at that moment and he just said it. He tried to convince himself it was no big deal, but he knew what he said had a very big meaning indeed and to be completely honest it scared him. Sam looked right back at Dean, showing no signs of giving up. Dean groaned, knowing he wouldn't be getting away from this question.
"I need you," Dean confessed under his breath. Sam put his hand to his ear and tilted his head.
"Oh, I'm sorry, what was that?" Sam asked with a glint of humor in his eyes. Dean glared at his brother.
"I said 'I need you', alright? " Dean reluctantly said. Sam's mouth dropped at little and Kevin's eyes widened slightly. Sam knew Dean wasn't very open with his feelings and the fact that he said that was significant.
"That's what broke the connection?" Kevin asked, obviously having been curious as to what Dean had said as well. Dean shifted uncomfortably and avoided Sam and Kevin's gaze.
"So you say 'I need you' and Cas completely breaks free of all powerful Heaven's control?" Sam asked. Dean remained silent and Sam let out an astonished laugh. "And you still don't think that he is in love with you?" Dean turned to give Sam a not-so-friendly look.
"Did you forget the part where he left and said that he had to keep the tablet away from me?" Dean asked bitterly, obviously still hurt by what Cas did. "It wasn't exactly a romantic moment." Sam frowned, remembering. Dean was a mess after that, he remembers that night when Dean came home and drank so much that he passed out.
"But, he came back didn't he?" Sam asked. "He came back and was a mess worrying about you being mad at him. I mean come on Dean, he even went out to buy your favorite things and-"
"Wait, what?" Dean asked, confused. Sam looked at him confused as well until he realized that Dean didn't know.
"Oh, crap. I never told you?" Sam asked. Dean lifted up his eyebrows. "After we left the bunker, Cas went out to buy you a bunch of stuff toilet paper, porn, eggs, and he wanted to get you some pie," Sam chuckled a little. "But, they were out and he almost smited the cashier when he wouldn't give him any." Dean continued to stare at Sam. He hadn't know that Cas had done that.
"Wait a second, how do you know that?" Dean asked skeptically. Sam sighed.
"You know Cas still feels really guilty about that, leaving you. So, the other night after you fell asleep, he came and asked me if you were still mad at him for it. I told him that you had forgiven him and while we were on the topic, Cas told me about that," Sam laughed a little. "I don't know if he meant to, he was kind of drunk." Dean raised his eyebrows.
"Cas drinks now?" Dean asked surprised. Sam frowned a little.
"Like I said, he still feels really guilty," Sam said and Dean let out an astonished breath. Cas, who had barely had a few sips of beer in his life as a human, was getting drunk because of how bad he felt about hurting Dean. A sudden rush of emotions went through Dean as he realized that Cas might actually have feelings for him. He thought of all the looks that Cas shared with him, looks that weren't shared by people who were just friends. All the sacrifices he made for him. He thought about how he swore off fighting, but as soon as Dick Roman took a step towards Dean, he pushed Dean behind him and charged at Dick. Purgatory. He left to be able to stay one step ahead of the monsters to keep them away from him. He was able to break out of Heaven's control because Dean said those three words...just three words...three powerful words.
"Do you need anymore reasons?" Sam asked, seeing Dean's flustered expression. Dean remained quiet, still processing.
"I think he figured it out," Kevin said with a smile. Sam grinned and looked over at Kevin.
"Now I'm hoping we won't have to give the reasons that we know you are in love with him," Sam said. Dean shook his head slowly. That scared feeling he got when he realized how much "I need you" meant was enough. The warm feeling spread through his chest as he realized Cas was in love with him too, was a sign as well. Sam nodded, slightly impressed that he didn't need to explain to Dean the thing he had been oblivious to forever. "Good, good. You should probably go find Cas," Sam encouraged. Dean nodded, still a little out of it. Kevin chuckled a little at Dean's expression. Dean continued to stare at the ground, bewildered, until Sam let out a sigh and turned him around towards the door and gave him a little nudge. Dean shook his head to clear it and looked up towards the nearby doorway.
"Here goes nothing," Dean said, before walking out the doorway.