I kinda ship this, but my main ship is plance (NO ONE CAN STOP ME) so if this sucks, then that's why ;)

All throughout the castle of lions it was quiet. Everyone had settled in early that night, even Pidge for once, with the soft hum of the lions lulling them all to sleep. All except one. Lance lay awake, arms folded behind his head as he stared up blankly at the ceiling. He wanted to go to sleep, but he just couldn't. There was this nagging feeling that something was off.

Lances sighed and rolled over, tucking in his legs and curling up into a fetal position. At this rate, he wasn't going to get any beauty sleep. Heck, he might even have bags under his eyes. Lance shivered. 'The horror!' He thought, allowing a small smile to come to his face. The smile quickly disappeared as a huge yawn escaped his mouth.

Lance breathed through his teeth, rolling over once again to try to find the perfect spot. Lance tossed and turned, but everything he tried was still uncomfortable. Without a word, he gave up and silently lifted his covers. Lance twisted around so he was sitting at the edge of the bed, and there he sat for a while, staring at his hands which he messaged with his thumbs. His feet tapped against the cool metal floor of the giant space ship.

He furrowed his brow. This never happened. Zarkon himself could rage destruction and death upon the world, and Lance wouldn't wake up until he had at least a good 10 hours of sleep. Biting his lip, he slipped his blue lion slippers on and tread softly to the bathroom.

Once there he put his hands on the edges of the sink, leaned forward, and stared. For a long moment, it was just Lance studying himself in the reflection of the mirror. 'I haven't changed at all,' Lance thought as a frown started to creep its way onto his face. 'So why do I feel so different?' The boy shivered as a chill suddenly ran down his spine. After standing there for a moment with his shoulders clenched, Lance slowly relaxed. His eyes traveled around the bathroom, landing on the faucet in front of him. He slowly turned it on, the waterfall-like noise soothing him to some degree. Lance cupped his hands the put them under the running water, careful not to let any escape through the little cracks in his fingers. He leaned down and splashed the water onto his face. The blue paladin then looked up into the mirror for another moment, watching the little droplets of liquid slide down his nose and cheeks.

"What is going on with me tonight?" Lance wondered aloud, snapping out of his silent trace and looking accusingly at his reflection. "Everyone's the same. Nothing is different. Pidge is still as smart and adorable, Hunk is still a big cinnamon roll," Lance smiled. "Shiro is still a dad, obviously. Allura is as gorgeous as she's ever been, Coran is...Coran, and Keith..."

Lances breath caught in his throat as a blush rose to his cheeks. "Ohmygod Keith." He sighed, biting his nail. Lance remembered now, how could he forget? He supposed he had wanted to forget, bury the feeling as he had with all of the others, but this one was different. It was strong, a flame that couldn't be put out easily. Ah, yes. Lance remembered clearly now. It had all happened last night on the training deck.

Lance stumbled back into the wall, hands grasping at the air. His back slammed against the wall, and he sank down until he was on the ground with his head hidden in his knees and arms. He was so embarrassed, so ashamed. (You see, Lance had been raised in a very homophobic family and had been taught that the LGBTQ+ community was just wrong.) Boys shouldn't think that other boys are good looking, that's just unheard of! Lance let a single tear slip down his cheek and into the folds of his pajamas. He didn't want to like Keith, but when he had walked in on him on the training deck, shirt off, muscles bulging, and abs glistening with sweat, he...he had never felt so alive before! He had to face the facts, no matter what his mother said. Keith was HOT. And Lance had a crush on him.

Butterflies arose in Lance's stomach. "Why am I like this?" Lance whispered to himself, voice trembling and thick with emotion. "I'm a disappointment, a mistake, and glitch in the system." Another tear let loose and Lance hugged himself tighter. "I shouldn't be liking boys, I should be liking girls, like every other boy in the universe! I mean, I love Allura, right?" Lance's voice got even quieter. "Right?" he asked himself again, barely even whispering. Though trying to convince himself otherwise, Lance knew deep down in his heart that he didn't really love Allura, at least not like that. The spark that he had once felt with the princess had gone out, and in its place was a bonfire. Not for her, but for Keith, with his strong body and shaggy mullet. Lance practically melted at the thought. 'His deep eyes, his piercing stare, his soft perfect smile,' Lance's face turned bright red. 'Heck, his jokes aren't so bad either...'

"Stop it, Lance!" The blush immediately disappeared. His fists slammed into the wall, drawing blood but he didn't care. What was there to care about anymore? Lance covered his head with his arms. "I'm a screw-up"

After countless minutes, Lance slowly untucked his head from his knees and looked himself in the mirror above him. He didn't see the perfect, beautiful, happy, and goofy boy he usually saw. Instead, he saw the red tearstained face of a freak of nature.

"Oh no." He murmured. "What would Mami think? Mami says that men who like other men are monsters, and should be put down." Lance's voice trembled as he relived all of the awful moments of his Mami, his home. The images came jumping back at him. His breath hitched as countless memories replayed themselves right in font of his eyes, most sad, and few happy. Lance clenched his fists and curled up against the wall. "Mami said..." Lance's voice cracked. "Mami said that men who like other men are animals." Lance squeezed his eyes shut. "And animals should be captured and put in cages."

A sad smile forced its way to Lance's face. He lifted his head and slowly stood up. "Mami's right." His body shook."Mami's always right." tears streamed down his face. "Besides," Lance's pained smile grew. "I'm used to hiding my feelings." The boy glanced at old scars littering his wrist. The tears fell like waterfalls from his eyes, which were so full of pain and regret, but also longing and needing. Still, the young paladin smiled.

"It's one of the things I'm best at, right?"