I was wasting my time
Trying to fall in love
Disappointment came to me and
Booted me and bruised and hurt me

She laid in her bed at night and thought "I finally figured everything out. I don't need Nate, Chuck, my mother, Serena, or Constance to validate who I am. I'm Blair Waldorf and tomorrow I will finally figure out who that is."

She spent months trying to help Chuck and his loss; she was there for Serena and helped her get rid of Gabriel and Poppy; she was there with Nate while he figured out his life as an Archibald. No one was really there for her when her life crumbled. Tomorrow though, everything will change.

She was set to meet up with Nate before going to a brunch at Serena's that Lily had planned. They spotted each other and walked to each other.

"Hey", she said. He leaned in to give her a kiss she moved her head so that the kiss landed on her cheek. " Is everything alright Blair?" he said giving a disconcerting look. "We can't do this anymore" she said.

"What do you mean?" he said with a look of uncertainty.

"You have been great and this has been good, but its not what I need or want. I think I've reached some point of enlightenment and realized I can't keep trying to be this idea of Blair Waldorf. Seeking perfection can't possibly be my only hobby. I need to figure things out. I'm sorry but this needs to end but I want you to know that I'm grateful for you being who you are and loving me in spite of everything. I love you Nate Archibald but I need to love only myself right now."

"Blair, where is this all coming from?" he asked.

"where is this coming from? It is coming from the fact that I don't even know who I am and I need to figure that out. I need to work on myself. I can't possibly have a nervous breakdown every time something doesn't go according to this irrational plan I have laid out for myself. I need figure out that it is okay to be just me." She exclaimed on the verge of tears.

"Blair its okay I get it. Your talking to me, I definitely understand." He said with a smile.

"I-I just have an opportunity to start fresh at NYU. I really need to…I want to. So I have to tell you that I can't move-in with you." She said.

"I figured." He said with a chuckle. She smiled and they both leaned in to kiss.

"I love you and thank you." She said and turned and walked away.

She walked into Serena's apartment and was greeted by Lily, Rufus, Eric, and Jenny. She asked for Serena and was told she was in her room. She walked to her room and went directly in without knocking. She soon saw she had disrupted Dan and Serena.

"Hey! cabbage patch can you leave?" she asked intimidating him with raising a single brow.

"Of course, since you asked so nicely." He said sarcastically.

"Dan I'm sorry." Blair blurted out before he walked though the door.

Serena and Dan looked stunned. "What?" Dan said as he stopped walking.

"I'm sorry for… I don't know just well umm. I said I'm sorry, accept already and leave." She said with a tinge on disregard and impatience.

"Apology accepted I guess." He stated with confusion blatantly etched in his face, he left.

" what was that all about?" asked Serena.

"I have reached the pinnacle point in my life where I just need to accept the travesty that people are and I suppose apologize for the ill feelings I have towards what they can not change. Humphrey can not change his social-ineptness, so I will just have to accept it."

"okay I suppose. What did you need to talk to me about B?'

"Well Nate and I have finally ended whatever we had, just an hour ago."

"What happened B? Are you okay? Shall I go get our two favorite men Ben and Jerry?" she stated trying to alleviate what she assumed to be coming, a Blair epic meltdown.

"Serena, I am perfectly fine. Actually today is a day of celebration. I, Queen B shall no longer reign in the upper east side and accept my lowly place as a undeclared freshmen at NYU." She states with a smile plastered on her face. Serena is shocked by the way Blair is exuding a vibrancy of cheerfulness. She is uncertain if Blair is being sarcastic and she just can not merely grasp it or if she really is happy with the new direction her life is heading.

"B, are you okay? What's happening and what do you mean?"

"Serena, I'm happy. I've just been thinking and I came to the realization that for the first time in my life, I have no agenda, no real plans to keep on tab, and most importantly the fact that it doesn't matter. I am happy that I don't have to live up to any plans and I can finally figure out what I want to do with myself. Maybe I might end up doing law like I planned or maybe I'll end up in Linguistics who knows, I surely don't and I'm excited because I don't."

"B, I'm happy that your seeing things this way but what does this little spiel you just stated have to do with Nate and you ending things."

"I was getting to that Serena, I want for once in my life no significant other holding my hand. I had my parents hold my hand and they handed it to Nate. When that seemed like it was closing, I ended up in a limo,--with Chuck, then back to Nate and I was handed back into bed with Chuck and when he didn't want me the Lord and then I was pining after Chuck and then I was back in the hand of Nate. Oh god just thinking about it makes be want to slap myself… Well basically all of that just really needed to come to a close. Do you not see that? A man can not define who I am and I have reached a cross point in my life and I want to do that alone."

"I get it B, for a minute there I thought you were going to come out to me." She states with an amused look and slight giggle.

" I might be going to NYU but I shan't experiment with one of my roommates."

" I don't think Chuck's limo driver would like you very much. He and Dorota are pretty keen on each other."

"Dorota?" Blair asked clearly confused.

"You knew that she and him-" Serena begins.

" I know about them. You know I won't be seeing Dorota too much come fall." Blair states.

"Why?"

"I'm moving out."

"What?!" Chuck states as he steps into the room.