"It's Amber."
It was Amber. The bitch who says she hates you. Who you butted heads with many times all for a job. Who you traded bitchy remarks with.
And then it was Amber. The same. But different. A different view. The woman you had a dumb crush on. Who you started to see as more than an ice queen. Who you eventually fell for.
Finally it was Amber. Amber writhing beneath you. Amber arching her back into your touch. Amber falling asleep next to you. Amber visiting you when you were at work for lunch, just because. Amber encouraging you to stand up to House, now she wasn't around to do it.
And then it was Jane Doe. The patient lying in that hospital bed. The patient who looked helpless, and pained, even in sleep. The patient who had yet to open her eyes. The patient who was dying. The patient that House couldn't save. The patient who opened her eyes in time to find out her diagnosis. The patient who cried long and hard into your shoulder when she found out. The patient who couldn't be your girlfriend.
Because Amber was strong. And brave. And a fighter. And she wouldn't let something like this accident so much as graze her.
But here you are. And you want to blame House. If he hadn't drank. And he hadn't called. And he had realised sooner.
But it was you. It was you who wasn't there to pick up the damn phone. And it's your fault. Not hers. Not House's. Not that ass of a driver who crashed into her in the first place.
"I love you. And I'm so sorry." You whisper, kissing her forehead.
"Don't... apologise. Thank you. You... made me... so... happy. I... love you... So much." She breathes.
And just like that, she becomes Amber, the dead woman lying in the hospital bed, still holding your hand, with tear tracks on her cheeks, and god knows how many unspoken words still on her lips.
"Amber." You half gasp, half laugh. Because you're so, so happy. She's there. Sitting next to you. You can feel her pressed up against you. She's curled up on the seat, her head on your shoulder, her legs tucked beneath her.
"Remy." She says, in a much sadder tone. "Oh, Remy." You remember why. She turns fully towards you, and hugs you, her arms around your neck. Yours fly to her waist and you breathe her in. She even smells the same, you observe. "Why?"
"So I could be with you. I don't have much time left as it is. I tried to hang on, but then my arm started twitching. And my leg. I was losing control. I couldn't send an innocent person to jail over it. It's not like I had much to live for, anyway. And then I saw you."
"So, what? You saw me checking up on you and decided to catch the bus back with me?" Amber asked, eyes still watery, a frown marring her perfect features.
"No. Well, not really... I decided... I had been thinking about it more and more since the spasms started. And then I saw you. It was like a promise, almost. Like, 'if you do it now, I'll be waiting'."
"No, baby, that wasn't what I meant. I wanted to see you. To see how you were coping. I didn't even think you saw me. But that wasn't what I meant by it. If you saw me, I thought..."
"You thought what? That I'd see you, think, okay... I just saw a dead woman, and move on? You should know by now, I'd follow you wherever." You smile slightly.
"Oh, honey, you shouldn't have done that." Amber sighs.
"I know. But it was better than the alternative." You defend.
"Agree to disagree." Amber said, a watery smile on her face. "I just can't believe you're here." She pulls you closer, tucking her head into the crook of your neck. Her lips graze your collarbone. Your bodies still fit perfectly together.
"I missed this." You sigh.
"Me too." She whispers, releasing a choked laugh. After you don't know how many minutes, she pulls back far enough to look you in the eye. "Ready to go?"
You nod. Because you've been ready for a long time. Ready for infinity with Amber.