I LOVE YOU FOREVER

(This is my first story. Please take it easy on me! Just a sad oneshot.)

"I'd like to thank you all for coming today to not only say goodbye, but to celebrate the life of of a beloved friend and wife, Mrs Anastasia Grey." The minister spoke in a calm yet professionally voice.

I couldn't hear anything, all I could do was sit and look at the photo of my wife. God she looked stunning in that picture. It was take on our honeymoon. The picture was taken by me while we were sitting by the beach, bring in the sun set.

Her hair was tied up in a messy bun, they way I liked it, sun glasses on the top of her head. Fresh fucked hair as she would call it. Her skin was a beautiful sun kissed colour. She was simply glowing. Smiling, not a care in the world. I smiled a small smile, trying despiratly to hold my tears in. I forced myself not to look at the shiny brown coffin that my wife is currently sleeping in. She will always be sleeping in. If I did look I know the tears would come full force. I have cried so much these last few days. Days . . Is that how long it's been? 7 days since It happened?. 7 days since my world stopped spinning. In some ways it seemed like yesterday when I last saw her shy smile. But in others, it felt like a complete life time when I when it happened.

~ 7 DAYS EARLIER~

"For fuck sake!" I yelled to myself as my laptop crashed, yet again. I'll need to tell Taylor to go out and buy me another one. I'd get one myself but I hardly get 5 minutes to myself these days without some kind of issue coming up. Sighing to myself, looked at the photoframe on my desk. I couldn't stop my self but smile a huge goofy grin as I looked at the picture of my wife. My wife. My Anastasia. God I am one lucky son of a bitch to have a woman as sexy and beautiful as her to call my wife.

I haven't heard from her today so I sent her a little email from my blackberry.

From: Christian Grey

To: Anastasisa Grey

Subjeect: Missing you.

My sexy Wife.

I hope you are having a better day than I am. Wish I didn't bother coming in after this mornings activities ;)

I will pick you up myself at 7pm from your work and we will have grab some dinner.

I know I am in desperate need of a large glass of wine.

Missing you already.

Christian Grey

x

Looking back at my laptop I noticed that it finially started to work again. Now hopefully I can get through today without any further problems. After working for a further 2 hours, I noticed that Anastasia has yet to reply. Maybe she didn't hear her phone go off? I decide to leave another email.

From: Christian Grey

To: Anastasia Grey

Subject: You ok?

Ana.

I'm guessing you didn't hear your phone go off or it's on silent?

Work is slightly better but would still rather be home with you.

Please reply as soon as you get this, I don't like not hearing from you.

I love you.

Christian

x

"Mr Grey, your next meeting is in the confrence room." Said my new receptionist Sheila. "Thank you Sheila, I will be right there." Signing I fix my tie and head of to my meeting.

The meeting was boring as usual. Nothing interesting happened. When it was finally over I went back to my office and checked my emails. No reply from Ana. I'm starting to get worried now. I deicded to give her a call and check on her. The phone rings until her voicemail picks up.

"Hey this is Ana, leave a message and I'll get back you" her sweet voice filled my ears. "Ana, its me. Why aren't you replying to my emails? Call me back asap. I'm getting seriously worried now. Love you."

Yet another hour has past and I'm starting to panic. Picking up my phone, I click on speed dial 4. The number for her office. " Anastasia Grey's office, Hannah speekiing how can I help?" Hannah? Why would she be answering Ana's office phone? "Hello, It's Christian Grey. Is Ana available to talk?" I say as calmly as possible. "Mr Grey! I'm afraid Ana hasn't shown up to work today. We tried to contact her but she isn't replying. We thought maybe she was ill or forgot she was supposed to work today." My heart is beating overtime as I register her words. Ana didn't show up to work? Ana never misses work! "Thank you Hannah." I hang up the phone and go straight to leave my office.

"Sheila, I am leaving early. Rearrange any further meetings I may have for another day" I say as i walk towards the elevator. "Yes Mr Grey" she replies.

Going straight to my car I can't help my panic as I think the worst. No Grey! Shop thinking like that, she probably has a headache and forgot to call work. She will be laying in bed sound asleep. I force myself to think. FInally I get to Escala head straight to our apartment. "Ana?" I say as I walk through the door. Hearing no reply I talk a little louder. "ANA?" Still nothing. I suddenly notice that the apartment is very quiet before I remember that Gail and Taylor are away on vaccation. I call her phone and hear it's ring coming from up stairs. Following the sound it leads me to our bed room. "Ana?" yet again I got no reply. I am about to walk out of the room when I notice that the door to the bathroom is open. I open the door and walk in slowly. What I see causes my heart to stop. I can't move for a few seconds.

There laying on the floor is Ana. Naked and still. She must of tripped out of the shower. "ANA!" I yell, running towards her. God she is freezing! It's not until I take her into my arm that I notice something wet coming from the top of her head. I look at my hand and am almost sick at what I see. Red thick blood stained my hands. "FUCK! Ana! open your eyes baby, please please open your eyes! ANA!" I sob. I quickly grab her phone and call my mother. As I wait for her to anser, I check that Ana is breathing, She is but her breaths are very shallow. "You'll be ok, I promise." I say while smoothing the hair out of her eyes.

Answer damnit! Finally she does. "Christian darling, I was wondering when I" I stop her once I catch my breath. "Mom! I found Ana laying in the bathroom. She's not moving and there is blood coming from her head! You have to help her!" I rush out all in one breath desperatly.

"Ok Christian,I need you to listen to me. Keep calm. I need you to grab a blacket and make sure she is warm. I need you to bring her to the emergency room. We don't have time to wait for an ambulance to arrive. I will inform my team and we will be waiting for you. Just keep calm." I hang up the phone without saying good bye and rush to grab her a blanket. I didn't bother with clothes. I had to get her there as soon as possible.

I pick her up as gently as I can, she is freezing. The pain in my chest tightens. Please be ok, I keep repeating in my head. I grab my car keys and place her gently in the back seat as comfortably as possible. I kiss her cold wet head. "You're save now. You will be fine. You'll be fine." I get in the driver seat, turn on the heating full blast and speed out towards the hospital. The drive felt like hours but was less than 5 minutes with my speeding. I probably went through 3 red lights but I didn't give a fuck. I had to make sure Ana was safe.

True on her word my mother stood by the door with her team waiting for us. I gently took Ana into my arms and rushed towards my mother. "Christian, place her on the gurney. She is freezing. Lets get her into the ER" I rush after her, not taking my eyes of Ana's head. I watch as they place a mask to help her breathe on her face. Another nurse places an IV in her arm, while another attach her to a heart monitor. "Christian, how long has she been like this? . . .Christian!" My mother asks me quickly. "I er . . .I don't know. She wasn't answering her emails a few hours ago." i said pathetically.

Beeeeepppp

"We need a crash cart in here now!" My mother yells. "I can't stablise the bleeding!" a nurse yells. I may not have gone to medical school but I know what that means. God no! No no no no NO! Please God, save her, she is a good person! Take me instead! I yell in my head. "Mr Grey you have to leave so we can save her" a nurse says trying to push me but my feet are frozen on the floor. "Christian! Go now or I will call security!" my mother yells. I slowly walk out of the room. A nurse greets me and leads me into a family room where I am all alone. I sit in an uncomfortable chair, the clock on the wall ticking as if to taunt me. Tick . . .Tick . . .Tick.

I look at my watch. 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 30 minutes. How long are they going to be?! The only place I want to be is with Ana, cuddling into her on our warm bed, smelling her soft silky bed would be cold without her. No! I will not think this way anymore. She is young and healthy, she will make it. She can't leave me. She hasn't seen the world yet. She has lots to look forward to.

I remember when I first met her. She fell into my office, dropping her paper and voice recorder in the process. She is a clumsy little thing. I smile remembering how nervous she was. She has come a long way since then. Now she walked with confidence, still stumbling over her feet occasionally. I fell in love with her in the first moments of meeting her, I just didn't know it. I put my head in my hands and try my best to even my breathing.

I thought about our last conversation since I found her. I was rushing for late, having forgot my morning meeting got changed to an earlier time. I almost forgot to say goodbye until she came running over to me. She wrapped her arms around my neck and gave me a quick yet passion filled kiss. "See you after work. Love you" She wispered in my ear in her sweet voice. "Laters baby" i yelled behind me. I should of stayed home that day. Maybe then she wouldn't be here.

I looked at the clock. I have been sitting here now for an hour. Please hurry up so I can hold my wifes hand and tell her that I love her. The door opened quietly, revealing my mother. She looked tired, eyes puffy and nose red. I pray that it's just from the stress of the situation. "How is she? Can I see her? Please?" I beg my mother. She will be ok. she will be fine. My mother is the best in Seattle. She can save anyone.

"Christian, I have to tell you something. When you brought Ana in, she suffered some serious damage to her brain. She loast loads of blood" my mother had to stop as she started to sob. Please let this conversation pick up. "Christian. I am afraid Anastasia is clinically brain dead" She wispered as she looked down at her feet. Brain dead? Ana? No this has to be wrong! Ana is . . . Ana! She's ok, they got it wrong!

"No . . your lying! She is ok. She can survive anything! She ...She..Sh..." sobs overtake my body. Nothing around me exsist anymore. Only sobs and pain. I am only just aware of my mother hugging me tightly as she sobs too. Normally I would flinch away but I needed to be held. I just wished it was Ana whose was holding me.

I don't know how long we cried together, but our sobs stopped, now a deathy silence filled the air. "Son, Ana is still alive, but not for long. You can say goodbye and hold her hand. Don't let her go through this alone. Be with her." My mother says soothly while smoothing my hair out of my face. Can I? Can I really hold her knowing her fate is sealed? I couldn't survive when she left me for those 5 days after the playroom incident. Yes! I will do this for her! "Ok" my voice barly above a whisper. She held my hand as we walked towards her room.

There she way. Beautiful as always. I held her hand, it was smooth as always but cold. I kissed her palm and closed it, sealing the kiss. "We will leave you alone to say goodbye" mother says as she and a nurse left the room. "Oh Ana, what am I going to do with you?" I whisper, sitting on the plastic chair beside her bed. Her was turned towards me. "You don't know how much you have changed my life Mrs Grey. I wish I met you sooner. I wish I could be the one sitting in this horrible room. You don't deserve this." I said, running my fingers over her cheek. My eyes watering yet again.

"I love you baby. I hope I made you as half as happy as you made me. Because of you I am a better person." My heart is breaking at my own words. "I will make sure I tell your dad how much you talked of him, how much you loved him. I don't know what to tell everyone. I wish . . I wish I didn't have to do this."

BEEEEPPPPP

My whole body shakes as I hear that horrible noise. ANA! I hold her hand, kissing every inch of her skin i can reach. Making sure her body is loved once more. "I will always love you Anastasia, don't you forget how much you are loved. Goodnight baby. I love you."

~ PRESENT DAY~

The rest of the funeral was beautful. Kate, Ray and myself said a speech, honouring Ana's memory. I didn't go to the servive, deciding to go home. Home . Escala is no longer my home, Ana is my home and home is gone. I walk the empty halls towards our room. I walked towards our bed. I haven't been able to sleep in this room since it happened. I haven't been able to sleep at all. My nightmares are no longer of my mother but of Ana. Cold and still. I grab her pillow and raise it to my nose, it smells like her, like she just left the bed. I considered ending this pain, but I know Ana would be pissed at me if I ended my life. So I will go on. I will continue to live for her. But for one thing for sure, I can never love anyone as much as I loved . . love Ana. I will forever be hers. Picking up the photoframe beside my lamp. The picture of our wedding day. I smile. The first smile since I lost her.

"I love you Ana. Always."

THE END