Forgive me

AN: I don't own anything.

I guess I lost my head last night
Kept on 'til I made you cry
Walked out with my stubborn pride
Wasn't nothing you could do to stop me
I hit the road but I didn't get far
Just drove around all night in my car
Now I'm not sure where to start
To tell you that I'm sorry

Flashback

"How could you? I trusted you, Sara, and I find you here kissing him!" Greg Sanders yelled. "You betrayed my trust with Grissom of all people. I thought you loved me."

Sara reached for him. "I do."

"Don't touch me!" He stepped away from her. "You sure have a strange way of showing your affection, loving one man and kissing another."

"Let me explain, Greg, please," Sara begged. "Grissom was just—"

"Just what, Sara? Helping you practice? I'll tell you what I saw. I walk in from a double shift, wondering why my boss left early, when I walk in on the reason. He was sitting on my couch, in my apartment, kissing my fiancé. I had every right to throw him out and every right to be mad at you."

Tears flowed freely from Sara's eyes. "Greg, I'm sorry. Please forgive me."

He looked at her, pain and anger filled his hazel eyes. "I can't, not now." Sara tried to comfort him and herself. "I said don't touch me! And don't follow me either." Greg snatched his keys from off the table and walked out.

"Greg, wait!"

"Why should I?" He turned on her, eyes blazing.

"Because I love you."

"As if! You love Grissom, always have. I don't know why you accepted my proposal. It's not like it means anything to you, not really anyway."

"Greg," she called. He ignored her this time. He climbed in his car and roared out of Sara's view.

End Flashback

Greg had driven for a while before he stopped. He couldn't erase Sara's betrayal from his mind. The city slowly faded from his rearview mirror until it was a bump and some lights on the dark horizon. He was thankful it was his night off and he didn't have to face either Grissom or Sara at work; he wouldn't have been able to handle it.

He had been sitting on the cliff for sometime when feelings of regret and sadness hit him in waves. He hadn't meant for any of this to happen and now he had to figure out how to say he was sorry. It was Greg's turn to cry. He held his head and wondered why on earth he would do that to Sara; he didn't even give her a chance to explain. He let his legs swing free and cried.

I just want to hold you
I don't want to hurt you
I don't want to leave
I just want to be with you
And after living alone, lost for so long
finally found the love of my life
Why would I say goodbye

"What have I done? I want to hold her now and tell her I'm sorry," Greg said to the air. "I don't want to hurt her anymore, I never wanted to. I don't want to leave, but if I have to, and only if I have to, I will. But after living by myself for so long, being lost for a long time, I found the love of my life in my best friend. Why the hell am I out here? I don't want to say goodbye." He wiped the last of his tears away. "I'm such an idiot."

I don't know what it is about the edge of a cliff
Makes we want to get so close to it
I guess this time I finally slipped
What a foolish way to end it
Maybe that's why I'm back here now
got both feet back on the ground

Greg turned to stand, twisting to put his hands on the ground beside him and one foot on the cliff edge. He twisted his body so he could put his other foot on the edge when the first slipped. His chest hit the cliff edge hard and his fingers fumbled for hold among the sparse desert grass; they wrapped around a clump and held. It hurt Greg to breath and his arms were beginning to hurt. He took as large a breath as he could and looked down.

The cliff dropped another five feet below him before sloping into a short, steep hill. The area directly below him was clear but the hill was littered with sagebrush; Greg knew he wouldn't walk out of there unscathed if he fell.

Greg felt his hands slipping and panicked. His fingers were cramping and the early frost forming on the grass made it slick. He tried to pull himself up and his arms gave out. The grass slid from his fingers and he fell. His knees buckled when he hit the ground and he began to roll. The sagebrush and grass scratched him, tearing at his clothes; he hit a large rock and heard a sickening crack. He was jarred to a stop when he hit a particularly large patch of sagebrush.

Greg laid there for a minute before attempting to sit up. Stars exploded in front of his eyes, forcing him back down. 'I'm such an idiot; I'm sorry, Sara.' A star twinkled above Greg before darkness enveloped him.

Bright morning light woke the man laying at the foot of the sagebrush. He squinted at the sun and sat up, ignoring the pain that erupted.

'Where am I?' Greg looked up at the cliff and everything rushed back. In his mind's eye he saw Sara crying, him yelling then driving, sitting on the cliff, falling, and stars. "Sara," he whispered aloud. He looked up at the cliff again and saw a small path winding to the top. He stumbled up and toward it.

The pain throbbed steadily and flared each time he fell. Slowly, Greg worked his way to the top and into his car. He sat in the driver's seat for a minute, breathing hard, before starting the car and heading back to Vegas.

Greg pulled up to his apartment building and saw a car that was unwanted. He climbed out and began to climb the outdoor stairs to his door. He stood before it, second thoughts forming.

'No, I came to apologize; I can't live without Sara.' He took a deep breath, as best as he could through the still throbbing pain, and opened the door.

Sara was seated on the couch, Nick's arms around her, crying. Both of their heads shot up when the door opened. They took in Greg's battered state and Sara sprang to his side.

"Greg, what happened? Where have you been?"

"You." Sara looked at him puzzled. "You happened." Greg switched his eyes to his friend. Nick stood and walked toward him.

"I can tell when I'm unwanted; I'm leaving." Nick walked past Greg, telling him, "I didn't do anything, I swear." Greg nodded and the Texan continued out the door, shutting it behind him.

Hopin' you won't turn me down
when I ask you for forgiveness

"Greg, what happened to you? You look horrible." Sara timidly reached for his face and, when he didn't pull away or yell at her, gently touched a scratch over his cheekbone.

He looked into her chocolate eyes. "I already told you, you happened."

"What?"

"When I left I drove for hours; I eventually stopped on one of those little cliffs out there. While I was sitting there I realized that my whole world revolves around you. You're what gets me day to day; you're what made me come back. I—"

"But you hate me," Sara interrupted, tears falling again.

"No," Greg said, wiping the tears away gently with his thumbs, "I hate what I saw, not you. I hate what I said, what I did. You, however," he paused for a painful breath, "you I could never hate. Will you forgive me for what I said, or what I did?"

Sara watched his eyes, the hazel betraying his emotions. "Can you forgive me for what I did? Can you forgive me for my, our, experiment?" Greg raised an eyebrow at her in question. "We wanted to know if anything still sparked between us."

"And?"

"Nothing, nothing at all. All my so-called love is gone from him. It has changed to pure love and resides her," she kissed him lightly, "between you and me. Will you, Greg, forgive my mistake?"

"Yes, Sara, I completely pardon you from that. Will you forgive me then?"

"Of course, I love you too much." Sara embraced Greg, squeezing his abdomen. He sucked in a sharp breath of pain. "Greg, what's wrong?"

"Remember when I said I was sitting on the cliffs, thinking? Well, I called myself an idiot for leaving and the cliffs agreed. I slipped when I stood and fell. I met a large rock that didn't like me very much. Something cracked but I don't know what."

"Poor baby. Let's get you cleaned up and into bed." Sara began to lead him away when Greg stopped. "What is it?"

"Why was Nick here? You weren't doing and 'experiment' with him too, were you?"

"Of course not. I freaked out when you weren't home after shift and called him. He let me cry on his shoulder. He didn't try anything. Now come on; I'm calling you in. It's my night off and you need rest."

Greg allowed himself to be taken care of only because he knew they both needed it. Later, when Sara was asleep, Greg picked up the phone and dialed.

"Stokes," answered a Texan accent.

"Hey, it's Greg."

"How are you feelin'? You looked like crap earlier."

"Better. Listen, I want to thank you for taking care of Sara. It means a lot to me."

"No problem; just don't go runnin' off like that again. Now get some rest; I'll come by later." Nick hung up, leaving Greg with silence.

A hand settled on his shoulder; he looked over it at Sara. "Come back to sleep. Nothing is going to happen." Greg rolled over, pulled Sara into his arms, and fell into sleep.

I just want to hold you
I don't want to hurt you
I don't want to leave
I just want to be with you
And after living alone, lost for so long
finally found the love of my life
Why would I say goodbye