"Kinky Cop or Slutty Bank Robber?"
Deidara turned, observing both costumes critically before asking, "For you or me?"
Hidan smirked, "Me of course."
Deidara cast one last appraising glance before shaking his head. "Neither, I thought you didn't like either of them anyways?"
The white haired man merely shrugged, "Pein, the fucker, said I needed to try something different for tonight so no leather or spandex. What are you wearing?"
"I don't know, I haven't even picked out my music yet."
"You realize you go up in like, three dances right?" casting the blond a sideways look before going over to the clothing rack. "Are you okay?"
Deidara sighed, shrugging noncommittally before realizing his friend couldn't see him. "I don't know, I guess I'm just not up to it."
Hidan snorted, "Well it's not like this is anyone's dream job Dei, it's just some shit temp job until we can find a real one. Are you still looking?"
Deidara nodded, "Yeah, but I can't find one that fits around my uni hours. What about you?"
Hidan didn't respond, holding up a skimpy firefighter's uniform in question to which Deidara shook his head at. "I don't know, it's not so bad . . ."
"Or" Deidara grinned, drawing the word out, "Someone's got a thing for the bouncer."
Hidan scoffed, "Hardly, we're just . . . I don't know, Kuzu doesn't really do relationships."
"But I haven't seen him take anyone else home since you two first hooked up." Deidara pointed out helpfully, turning in his seat to face the mirror as he began applying eyeliner.
"I could always try the vampire thing." Hidan said, ignoring the blonde's comment though the tiniest smile graced his features. "Suigetsu did it the other night and made a shitload."
"You're certainly pale enough" Deidara said, applying a bit of sparkly eye shadow. "What about the Naughty Nurse? Or maybe the French Maid?"
"I think I'll do the nurse tonight. You?"
"I'll guess I'll wear the pirate." Deidara said tiredly, staring at the black, red, and white costume in distaste."
"Hmm, I seem to remember a certain bartender being very appreciative of it last time you wore it."
"Shut up un." Deidara muttered, flush spreading over his cheeks as he looked down at the counter before him.
"I'm sure Itachi will be more than distracted for a bit, good luck." Hidan murmured," sliding the white miniskirt up his legs. "Can't nurses wear pants; I swear most of these costumes are for chicks."
"Konan picks them out." Deidara muttered distractedly, "Toss me my outfit?"
"Yeah" Hidan said, throwing it at him and narrowly missing his head earning a disgruntled huff from the blond. "What song should I tell Tobi?"
"Eh, Love Addict, yeah? You should get going, Suigetsu just got done and Haku's up next."
"Yeah, you coming to his goodbye party tonight?"
Deidara sighed, "Wouldn't miss it."
-x-x-x-
"You're staring." Itachi muttered, smirking at his friend as he leaned against the counter, eyes fixed on the stage.
"The kid's got a nice ass." Kisame shrugged, not apologizing.
"He's barely legal."
"He's nineteen." Kisame argued. "And he's only two years younger than Deidara."
"Deidara can drink." Itachi clarified, "And what's he got to do with anything?"
"No one pays attention to drinking age, it's fucking ridiculous, and it's obvious you've got a thing for blondie."
Itachi pretended to concentrate on the glass he was cleaning, wondering whether he was really that obvious or if Kisame just knew him too well after years of friendship. The final notes of Love Game ended, Suigetsu collecting his earnings and slinking off the stage under the watchful eyes of Kisame as For Your Entertainment began to play, Haku strutting out.
"So its Haku's last day today?" Itachi said, already knowing the answer but deciding to change the subject.
"Yep, I don't blame Zabuza, if my boyfriend worked here I'd make him quit."
"Make him?" Itachi asked, dark eyebrow perfectly arched.
"Yeah, don't tell me you wouldn't."
"I'm not saying that, I'm just saying that Suigetsu would have you so whipped you couldn't make him do a thing." He smirked.
"The fuck I would." Kisame muttered, taking a sip of his beer.
"You would." Came an offhand comment from the side, Kakuzu walking up to the two.
"Pein's going to have your ass if you don't get to the door; we've already got a complaint from one of the dancers about handsy customers."
"I'll be there in a sec" Kisame muttered, glancing at the stage for a second before downing the rest of his drink and heading off.
"I thought you were on door duty?" Itachi asked, handing a customer a drink before turning to the money loving bouncer.
Kakuzu merely grunted, Itachi handing him a beer as the man shrugged. "Kisame's had too much to drink tonight to notice, and I wanted a break."
"Hmm, or, you wanted to see Hidan's dance." Itachi said knowingly, glancing up as said man sauntered onto the high stage as the first notes of I'm a Slave for You sounded over the speaker, gripping the pole in a loose hand and staring out across the room with a smoldering gaze, eyes briefly straying to the man at the bar before looking back at the audience below.
"He's a good lay." Kakuzu said noncommittally.
"He is indeed." Itachi smirked, earning a sharp glare from the older man.
"You slept with him?" Kakuzu hissed, voice low and threatening.
Itachi smirked, meeting the glare dead on, "No, but you seem a bit possessive over someone you claim's just a casual fuck, don't you think?"
"Playing therapist again?" Sasori chuckled, walking up to the two and downing the shot Itachi wordlessly handed him. It was always a necessity for all the bartender's to have a drink before their shifts started, finding it bit easier to put up with some of the more obnoxious customers they got.
"Nothing better to do." Itachi shrugged, Sasori humming in agreement as he turned to a customer, putting on his falsely charming smile.
Itachi frowned, wondering how the redhead could stand all the people constantly trying to pick him up or bitch about their problems, having been subject to Sasori's infamous short temper before. At work Sasori seemed to have more patience than Itachi had ever seen him with; no wonder he got more tips.
"He's been in a good mood lately." Kakuzu murmured, eyes raking over Hidan's lithe body as he twirled around the poll, eyes lustfully meeting those of his onlookers.
"He's got a boyfriend." Itachi informed, downing a shot himself before giving another round to the leering customer demanding his attention.
"Really now?" Kisame said, stumbling back over from the door. "Who is it?"
"Some guy, Kankuro I think . . ."
"Damn, Hidan's really raking it in tonight." Kisame muttered, "Most of the dancers have been, I guess customers are happy tonight."
"Or drunk." Itachi snorted.
"I think we should station a bouncer towards the front." Kakuzu muttered, "they're supposed to keep their hands off."
Itachi smirked, shaking his head as he stirred a drink, "Or, you could just ask him out like a normal person and not have to worry about him getting picked up by other guys."
"Right" Kakuzu muttered, "I'll do it as soon as you sleep with Deidara."
Itachi shook his head, not commenting as Hidan shed his last article of clothing, the crowd going wild as the spotlight shut off before he left the stage.
"Quite a view eh?" A more than slightly inebriated customer slurred, lazily pointing at Deidara who was loosely clothed in a skimpy pirate's outfit.
Dark eyes narrowed, Itachi attempting to ignore the man as his eyes hungrily raked over the blond, possession obvious in his gaze.
"Now that's a piece of ass I wouldn't mind taking home, what do you think are my chances?"
Itachi was saved from offering a scathing comment as Sasori stepped in, "Trust me, I don't think you'd like to try, the blonde's got a bit of a temper."
"Please." the man drawled, nearly falling out of his chair as he leant forward, "A night with me and I'm sure I could tame him."
"There's a strict no touching policy here." Kakazu said, sensible enough to step in and save his friend form committing a potential felony.
"Eh, and what're you going to do about it?"
"Okay wise guy, let's go." Kakuzu huffed, tugging the protesting man up by his collar and leading him over to the door, Kisame giving a two fingered salute to a smirking Itachi.
"You know, he's not the first to point out Deidara." Sasori said quietly, "and he certainly won't be the last."
"What's your point?" Itachi asked, a little more abrasively than he would have liked.
"My point" Sasori continued, ignoring the tone, "is that you should ask him out. It's long overdue and you two might be good for each other. At the very least, it'd save me from having to wipe drool off of the counter after all his dances."
Itachi glared at the insinuation, eyes straying against his will back to the stage before darkening at the sight of so many eager onlookers. Loathe as he was to admit it, perhaps Sasori was right. And, if nothing else, Itachi was a man of action.
AN: This idea just popped into my head and I decided I'd run with it. Tell me what you think and please let me know if you're interested in me continuing with this!
Reviews are Love! =D