Renesmee

Chapter 1: "Mom is like a Cobweb"

This chapter was written because Nessie needs her side to be told. Naturally, I can only imagine how she would look, talk, act, and feel. So I had to rely on some characters and have it reflect who Nessie truly is or would be, and in essence have her come into her own.

He dipped his hand down into the water- it frothed and licked his tanned hand. I studied the fish though, writhing and gulping that tasty thing we call air. It was a silvery, slippery thing, and it fought with all it had.

Still, it began to slow its fight. I sat on the ground, legs stretched; still amazed that Jacob was here, with me. I watched as he sliced the fish's head off, it whipped in the air and fell, landing by the oak tree.

"You hungry?" He said to me. Always careful when he spoke to me now, as if I would fly away and disappear if he spoke too harsh. He took the fish, cleaned it in clean water pan, threw some flour on it, tossed it in a different blue pan with some oil in it and cooked it over the fire. It was midday in Fredericksburg, Virginia.

Jacob never really touched me. No, I take that back. He does touch me: holding my hand with his long fingers loose, so I must grasp it occasionally and get a grip, he would sometimes brush my "forever hair" as he calls it, because my hair is very long, past my buttocks. My Jacob doesn't know this, but I will cut it very soon. Sometimes a brush across my cheek he will deliver, and I would shudder.

But nothing more than that.

"Nessie."

"Oh," I said, and then shook my head 'no'. I didn't want anything. I wasn't hungry, I wasn't thirsty, I didn't need my hair brushed, I didn't want to go into another movie theater so he could sit next to me and not hold me as usual…I wanted to feel him.

"Jacob, turn around. Talk to me."

He turned then. Stunned I was already near him, yet we were so far apart. He told me how every wolf knows who his lifemate is, and that I am his. I didn't feel like it.

"I didn't hear you."

"Of course you didn't," I retorted. "You never hear me, touch me, kiss me-nothing!"

" Eat."

"No!" I stamped my foot, while my arms were crossed. That's when I saw a smile. A small one, hit his face, oh! Wasn't he just too gorgeous for words!

"Why Nessie, I believe you are having a tantrum." He dropped the fish in the stained, tin bucket and grabbed my hand as he stood up. He caressed the skin of my wrist, then turned it over and did the same to the back of my hand. His hands were actually soft, but brutally hot.

"You look cute when angry."

I thought to myself, Sure I look cute, but not like her….

Her being Bella Swan.

My mother.

Somehow, she still lingers between us. Like cobwebs that never dies, just you sweep it down and find more ghostlike strands, but still there. As a child, I had very good memory, and it grows sharper by the day. I know he had my mother sexually, I believe he and father had problems before that, and it is only because of the whole wolf versus vampire thing, and maybe that little treaty between the Cullens and the Quileute tribe.

Anyway, Jacob and I decided to leave Forks and go ahead East. I mean, really far east, like Virginia , where we have a nice cabin, a lake, and hardly any neighbors at all besides the occasional rabbits, some wolves, and maybe possums.

*

It didn't take long for me to have my first puberty. The first growth. I shot up after another year, then the following year, I practically looked like a preteen. Jacob still waited for me. He kept his word and has stayed away from mother. Even chance meetings were forbidden by my father, and especially me.

I doubt Bella, I mean mother, agreed with the arrangement, but so be it. She was married and had a child. Even Esme told her one day that she was behaving 'unlike her old self'. I was younger then, but my mother really hated that and hasn't spoken to Esme for a week afterwards.

But, as everyone knows, you can't stay mad at us Cullens forever. Esme and mother, as well as other members of the house got along with mom fine.

Except for me.

She cooked for me, watched television with me, and helped me with my schooling…but I could feel her iciness fall from her skin and it scared me sometimes. It was called hate that slithered from her.

Now, of course the question remains: Does she even love Edward Cullen? The one that gave her me?

Some gossip says they truly don't know anymore.

Others like dad, and even Jacob admits that Bella and dad have a past that is rich in memory, heartaches, love, lust, passion. Everything a good story could have. They were kindred, and right for one another.

Dad made his mistakes.

So have mom.

So did Jacob.

I feel like a mistake sometimes.

"Maybe I will have that fried fish after all." I say to Jacob.

Next, I knew, my hand is quickly dropped to my side to hang; I hope I imagined that his lips were only inches from mine, about to graze it, about to console me.

As I thought about Bella.