True Lies

Somewhere inside, I knew. At that moment it didn't register. At that moment, I knew it wasn't enough. I loved him. But how can I say that to him now?

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To my old fans: No, you probably don't know this book, but I suggest you read it. One of the best I've ever read.

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To my (hopefully) new fans: I read the Hunger Games, loved it, and became so addicted I have read it over 3 times. I've written other stories, too, so this is not my first.

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The story line: Basically, I was too curious about Katniss and Peeta's relationship later on (how they suffered and whatnot) to not write about it. So, this story will consist of 3 chapters: Coming home, faking it for the fans, and the end.

Coming Home: The reactions of her friends and family, not much Peeta, many cameras, and Gale.

Faking it for the Fans: Touring around Panem. Faking it will Peeta. Yata yata.

The End: What? You expect me to tell you? Pfft. Tune in, my friends….

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Chapter One, Coming Home

It took me a minute to register that the screams I heard were not screams of hatred. With the sound level so high, I couldn't tell whether everyone was yelling in fury or joy. Then I saw their faces, bright and smiling, and I knew they couldn't be happier. It made me smile too, because I was the victor. The weeks preparing for the Games seemed years away now. All I could see were the smiling faces of my friends, of my home, and I knew that everything would be different from now on.

So different. So much better.

Peeta squeezed my hand, and it almost felt painful to me. It made my heart pump painfully in my chest like there was something horrible in my blood. The weeks I had spent in the arena could not prepare me for what I had done to Peeta. He had been everything to me the past week. Now he was just a boy who I had to pretend to be madly in love with.

The difference was staggering, but I couldn't let that show.

Right now I was playing my part perfectly. I was clinging to Peeta like he was my last hope, and he was doing the same to me. The act felt uncomfortable, but I knew it would be over soon. We walked down the platform of the train, waving gleefully to the crowd, and even though the guards were holding the crowd back I could still feel the pull of their needy hands.

I wanted to let go of Peeta, to go see my family, but I knew that might not be possible at this point. We're still in the Games, and this moment of emotion is more vital than ever. If we want to live, I have to act harder. Haymitch comes up behind us, smiling proudly, and whispers in both our ears so quietly I have to ask him to repeat it.

"I said, I know you two are itching to go see your families, but hang on a few minutes while they get a few good shots of you two standing together. After that, the cameras will be shut down for the most part, and you two can be free for a while."

We both nod and cling to each other tighter, smiling at one another at random moments in hopes that the cameras capture it. I search the crowd eagerly for my mother and Prim, and finally I spot them towards the front. Both of them are waving with tears in their eyes, and I am overwhelmed by a sense of joy to see that they are still well and happy. I almost break down right there, seeing them like that, but I hold myself together and pretend to whisper something to Peeta. I have just turned back to the crowd when I see him.

Gale is smiling at me, but I can see the hurt in his eyes. Suddenly, the arm around my waist not only feels alien but completely unwelcome. I want to be in Gale's arms. I want him to be the one holding me, not Peeta. It's all I can do to keep from running towards Gale and flinging myself into his arms.

Haymitch begins to whisper again, and this time my heart is pumping painfully fast. "Ok, you can go now, but I don't want you to jump away from each other immediately. Play it out."

I turn to Peeta with real tears in my eyes, but not because of him. Because of Prim. Because of Gale. Because I know this is wrong, and kissing him goodbye feels so wicked I feel the tears begin to overflow. I have been strong in the Games because I had to, because I knew I couldn't let my emotions show.

But being here, back home, I can find no reason why I have to hide the tears.

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As both Peeta and I move forward, both still wrapped together, I hear Haymitch whisper quietly in my ear. "I know you have another boyfriend, sweetheart. I see you looking at him. But can you hold it off for a while? Until tonight?" he asks. I give a slight nod of my head, and I know he understands.

Peeta and I make it to the fence holding the crowd back, but we both know we can go no further. The urge is too strong.

I turn my head towards him, giving him what I hope is a pleasant kiss. I try to turn away from him like I'm in pain, but I think it comes out more like a scowl. I ignore that, though, because Prim and my mother are only a few yards away, and they're all that matter right now.

I don't think there has been a time in all my life where I've felt so much joy. Winning the Hunger Games, kissing Peeta, even coming home cannot compare to what I feel when I touch Prim. I wouldn't call it a touch, though, because I practically squeeze the life out of her when we embrace. Her arms are wrapped tight around my neck, never releasing their grip, and I am holding onto her for dear life. She if my one and only love in this world, and I can't recall ever loving her so much.

"Katniss! Katniss! Katniss!" she screams in my ear. I don't know how many times she says it, but I know I don't want her to stop. Her words are too much.

"Oh, Prim!" is all I manage to say. I'm bawling now, and I don't care at all that the whole world is watching. Prim's in my arms.

After almost fifteen minutes of hugging and kissing, we finally break apart. I hug my mother, and even though I am still crying tears of joy when I see her, I just want to hold Prim. I don't think I'll be able to let my sister go for years.

I turn back to Prim, looking her up and down before hugging her again. "You've grown," I say. I'm pleased, because this means she's eaten enough.

"And you've shrunk," she giggles. I laugh with her. "The baker's been feeding me, but I don't think anyone's been feeding you much."

"Oh, I've had my share," I say, and we both cry harder.

"I love you, Katniss."

"Oh, Prim, I love you so much." I pull her away just to look in her eyes. They're red and swollen. "Do you know what this means? We don't have to starve anymore! We can eat as much as we want! We'll be filthy rich!"

I hear a sob of joy and I look up to find my mother sharing our embrace. I put my arm around her, and I know this has to be the happiest she's ever been.

Being here, being in my mother and Prim's arms again, make the situation suddenly dawn on me harder than ever. I will never have to starve again. Prim can grow up in luxury, and my mother can go into a peaceful retirement. I cry harder than ever and feel Prim's arms pull me tighter.

There's a tap on my shoulder, and I try to shove it off. But it's persistent. It taps me so hard I'm sure a bruise will form. Finally, I give in and look over my shoulder. My breath leaves my lungs.

Before me is Gale, and I don't think I ever thought him more handsome than I do now. That's the first thought that hits me, and I'm surprised by it. Does this mean I truly do love Gale? Even if I'm sure I don't, I can't resist the temptation (despite Haymitch's warning) to jump into his waiting arms.

I'm so full of joy that it feels like I'm on drugs. Adrenaline is pumping in my veins, and I forget completely about the hell I've been through this past week. I hug Gale for a full minute, but I finally have to force myself to let go. Holding on any longer and I risk my reputation as Peeta's love. When I pull away from Gale, he tries to kiss me on the lips, but I quickly deflect it with my cheek.

"Not now," I whisper in his ear.

"Oh," he whispers back, "that's right. You're Lover Girl now."

I giggle to hide my pain, because that hurts me like no knife ever could. "How have you been?"

"Fine. And you?"

"Oh, just incredible. My weeks have been sunny and warm, I've been fed bountiful feasts, and I'm in the best condition of my life!"

"How wonderful!"

"And didn't I mention? I got to wear sparkly dresses!"

Then we both laugh so hard we have to cling to each other to keep from falling down. Gale must know I hated wearing those dresses, because he wouldn't be laughing otherwise.

But you didn't hate those dresses, a voice in my head whispers. You really, really liked them…. You liked being beautiful.

I want to ask Gale if he thought I looked beautiful, but I bite my tongue. Somehow, I know that would be crossing the line. Even if the world couldn't see, it would be giving Gale false hope. I don't think I could do that to him. The laughter from both of us dies away slowly, and we stand there smiling stupidly at each other.

"What will I do without my hunting partner?" he asks, trying to keep the light mood. I can hear the hurt in his voice.

"You won't ever need a hunting partner," I say, "because you're going to have so much food you won't even know what to do with it."

He looks at me for a while, like he knew I was going to say something like that. Then, he says, "What if I don't want endless food? What if I liked to earn it myself?"

I look deeper in his eyes and find the truth of both of us reflected there.

"Then," I say, my voice barely audible, "I'll just have to earn it with you."

I want to kiss him. I want to do something to show that the past weeks have been lies. I want him to know, more than anything, that I still love him no matter what he sees or hears.

I'm about to tell him when I feel a tap on my shoulder. It's Peeta, and he's smiling so brightly I immediately know what he knows: that the camera's are watching, and I'm losing everything we've worked for right in front of Panem.

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I'd love a review! I'll update soon!

~Alien