Author's Note: ... ... ... ... ... Siiigggghhhh...

Okay, look. I've started watching D. Gray-man (which rocks, btw) and I NEEDED to type a fic about that show.

So... this is something I cooked up at 1 in the morning and finished in 2 hours... (Talk about retarded)

Jeez...

Hope it's okay:)


The Final Battle was about to end. That much she knew. And yet she couldn't suppress the feeling that something was wrong. Everything was looking up on their side. On God's side. Salvation had been brought to the Akuma. Souls have been freed. Noahs have been destroyed.

Lenalee Lee was supposed to feel triumphant.

And yet she worried.

She worried for Allen Walker, whom their fates rests upon. Allen Walker, who struggles to protect his friends, his comrades, his family. Allen Walker, who Lenalee wouldn't hesitate to stand infront of the Earl of Millennium for.

Allen Walker, who was literally fighting for the world.

Bodies of her comrades - no, family- were strewn in a bloody mess around her, along with bits and pieces of the Akuma. Lenalee had expected no less than this during the Final Battle with the Earl of Millennium. And yet she couldn't fight back the overwhelming wave of despair, her vision slowly blurring with grief and sorrow. She shouldn't look at the bodies of those she called family. No, she couldn't.

She wouldn't break down now. There would be time to grieve over their deaths after all this was over, after Allen wins the battle. After the world is saved.

Lenalee noted that there were only a few Exorcists either standing or barely alive; Lavi, Yuu Kanda, Arystar Krory, Miranda Lotto and Bookman. She realized that Krory was completely wiped out, having to lean against part of a demolished stone pillar to keep himself upright. Miranda had exhausted herself, and she laid a few feet from Krory. Bookman was lying on Lavi's lap, his eyes shut. Lavi was on the ground, looking at his superior with his single eye that were attempting to conceal the anguish he felt.

Eyes that a Bookman should never have.

And so Kanda was the only one left standing, proud and tall, even though his Mugen was nothing but a pile of ashes. Even with blood gushing out of an open wound across his chest and his long, navy hair hacked off unceremoniously, he looked resolute and strong. Something Lenalee failed at.

Blow the pain away. Come up on your hands and knees. Pour yourself inward, like sand in an hourglass.

Gathering every ounce of strength left in her, she tried to stand up. Her legs trembled for a moment, before her knees collapsed under her. There was a whirl of colours. Then she halted mid-fall.

"K-kanda?" the girl said weakly. Said man lowered her onto the ground slowly.

"Lenalee," he replied impassively, crouching next to her. "Don't overuse your Innocence." He wasn't looking at Lenalee, however. Instead, his dark and cold eyes were fixed on the raging battle in the near-transparent dome that resided ahead of them.

"But I need to help Allen-kun. I need to tell him..." Lenalee protested softly, attempting to use Kanda as leverage to stand up again. Kanda made no move to stop her, or to help her.

"You'll only be a burden, Lenalee," the samurai said abruptly. Lenalee froze, hand on his bare should as she tried to push herself up. The girl looked at him with stunned and hurt eyes. She fell with a soft thud back onto the crimson ground.

"W-what?"

"It won't help him if you suddenly interfered with their battle. As annoying and idiotic the moyashi is, he knows what he's doing. In your state, you can barely stand. Much less fight. It's his battle now. And he's the only one who can end it. We've done our part. We have no choice but to wait for the aftermath."

Lenalee slumped in defeat. He was right. Besides, this was Allen Walker they were talking about. Of course he'll defeat the Earl of the Millennium.

Lie to yourself until it's true.

"Yes... yes... You're right, Kanda. Allen-kun's a strong person, after all..."

Kanda muttered something which sounded suspiciously like 'moyashi...' and Lenalee managed a small and rather feeble giggle.

As they set their eyes upon the dome where the battle took place, images seemed to flash through Lenalee's mind.

Memories. Just think of the good things.

Memories about her beloved brother, Allen, Lavi, Kanda, the Black Order, her family... her world.

-

-

"Ne... Allen-kun?"

"Hai, Lenalee?"

"I was just wondering... will the bad things ever stop? Even when the Earl of Millennium is defeated?"

"Nobody wants to admit this, but bad things will keep on happening... Maybe it's all a chain, and a long time ago someone did the first bad thing, and that led someone else to do another bad thing, and so on."

"Hmm... Like that game where you whisper a sentence into someone's ear, and that person whispers it to someone else, and it all comes out wrong in the end?"

"Exactly. Or maybe... Maybe..."

"Allen-kun...?"

"Maybe bad things happen, because it's the only way we can keep remembering what good is supposed to look like."

-

-

Lenalee was violently shaken out of her reverie. She'd expect to be looking into the face of Kanda when she finally managed to pry her dark eyes open. It wasn't.

The dome that hid Allen and his opponent had exploded, shockwaves radiating from its center. Bright, white light burst forth in all directions, blinding the remaining Exorcists momentarily. A cry of agony swept the battlefield, and Lenalee felt as though a part of her had suddenly been ripped from her being.

Her hand flew to her chest, clutching where her heart is. Eyes screwed shut, she flung her head down, the pain so intense that she just wanted to curl up and die. It felt like... like she was being split in half. Like her soul was ripped in two.

Lenalee managed to crack an eye open, and saw Kanda kneeling next to her. What bothered her was the fact that his eyes were closed, as though fighting an internal battle, and that his posture was defeated.

"K-k-kanda..." Lenalee rasped, lifting a trembling hand to touch the samurai. Kanda opened his eyes, and she froze.

Those weren't the same eyes that she saw a few moments ago. It was as though -

"Allen's gone," Kanda stated, sounding neither remorseful nor gleeful, happy nor sad.

The pain in Lenalee's being intensified as maniacal laughter echoed around the battlefield; reverberating off the stone ruins, ringing in their ears.

"T-the p-pain..." she gasped. Her other hand crept up to clutch at her heart. "A-allen-kun..."

"Allen-kun... gone... It... can't be... He's alive! He has to be! He promised!" Lenalee tried to say, but her words came out in a hoarse and barely audible whisper.

"It's over, Lenalee. After all we've been through. It's the end," Kanda replied quietly, his eyes closed again, and he looked like he was mourning.

Lenalee felt like throwing up from the agony and regret.

Regret that she hadn't been able to tell Allen how much she loved him.

And now he's gone, and the world's going to end.

Allen Walker failed.

They were all going to die.

Right there and then, Lenalee Lee broke down infront of, literally, death's face.

'No,' Lenalee thought, suddenly determined. 'This isn't the end. It's only the beginning. After this, in another life and world, maybe we'd all lead a happy life, a life better than this. We'll be together again. A family.'

Yes.

Lie to yourself until it's true.


Author's Note: I got some lines from a book called 'Nineteen Minutes' by Jodi Picoult. It contained some very nice phrases and I thought that it wouldn't hurt to add some in...

So... yeah...

First D.Gray-man fic! So don't be too hard about the characters being OOC or something...

Hope you enjoyed it!! And review, please:))))