DISCLAIMERS; I do NOT own anything :( I don't own anything people, places, songs, films, book, ect. Written purely for entertainment.
How can she expect me to be a part of this sham of a wedding, I've made it clear I think it's a stupid idea; I mean really they are kids - we all are - getting married at our ages is the worse idea. Not to mention that she actually thinks getting married to that poor excuse for a 'man' Finn. Everyone can see she is too good for him; he is going to hold her back from achieving her dreams. He won't move to New York with her and she will be stuck here in Lima. I would never do that too her, I'd make sure I was there by her side when she becomes the biggest star of modern times. Oh crap Rachel is still talking. Damn it Fabray listen!
"…..So what do you think?" Rachel asks me finally looking up from her bridal magazine, with a hopeful look on her face.
"Yeah Rach, that sounds perfect." I reply smoothly smiling, and mentally high five-ing myself.
"Really, so florescent orange is a good idea? Did you think I wouldn't realise you'd zoned out. Seriously Quinn have you even been listening to any of my ideas about the bridesmaid's dresses?" Rachel replied with a huff. CRAP…busted… I need a good reason for ignoring her!
"I'm sorry Rachel, really. I didn't sleep well last night; I think I might be coming down with something." I lied, hoping to she would fall for it.
"Oh honey, why didn't you say something, I could have made you my special vegan soup." Rachel says her eyes full of concern. Getting up from her chair she crouches down next to me wrapping my in a warm embrace.
God I love Rachel's hugs they are perfect, her arms fit around me perfectly. It is like we were made for each other. Like God planned everything this way on purpose, like all the crap I've had to go through was always going to be made better by Rachel's love. God I love you Rachel, if only you really knew.
"WHAT!" Suddenly the warmth is gone and Rachel is looking down at me with a panicked look. Did I miss something, what the hell happened?
"What did you just say to me?" Rachel demands, her eyes growing hard and cold.
"SHIT! Did I just say that out loud?" I whisper to myself, trying desperately to remember if I had indeed just confessed my love for the little diva. Looking up at the brunette it becomes very clear that I did indeed just confesses. Before I can form an explanation hear a loud bang sound and almost instantly feel a sharp pain in my cheek.
"You just slapped me!" I whisper disbelievingly.
"You just slapped me!" I repeat louder this time, I can feel the anger bubble up inside me, "who do you think you are….."
"Who do I think I am? Who the fuck do you think you are?" Rachel shouts cutting me off completely, the anger in her eyes scares me.
She just cursed at me. Rachel just cursed at me. RACHEL just cursed AT ME!
"You just cursed at me, you never curse." I say, "This is not going right at all!" I mumble to myself.
"Oh and how was this meant to go Quinn? You confess your love and we run off together and live happily ever after? Is that what you thought would happen?" Rachel questions, should have known she would hear me mumble.
"No Rachel, of course not. I'm not stupid. I was never going to tell you. You were never meant to find out, you were going to marry Finn have a perfect little life in Lima. Whilst I leave and get over you, because I know full well I can never have you. That you will never love me back. Because I am not stupid! I'm not stupid! I'M NOT! I WON'T LET MY FATHER BE RIGHT!" I scream, I realise I've lost control but this is going so wrong, she was never meant to know. Suddenly the realisation that she is indeed rejecting me hits me and I can literally feel my chest tighten, and before I can stop it I am sobbing uncontrollably. She was never meant to find out about how I felt, so I've never thought about how she'd react. Before Rachel can say anymore to me, I stand up – so quickly I knock the chair down – and I run, I run out of her kitchen, out of her house, out of her street and out of her life.
I sob remember that day; it was five long years ago. That was the last time I ever spoke to Rachel. She went through with the wedding and last I hear was a housewife in Lima, whilst Finn works at Burt's shop; I heard they'd had a kid too, a little boy. God knows if she is happy. When I feel the few member of the glee club I kept in contact with, we never talk about 'Finchel'. Santana and Brittany got married 18 months ago and Brittany is currently pregnant with their first baby – I could never imagine Santana embracing her love for Brittany the way she has. Kurt is now a successful designer living happily with her boyfriend, Chris.
In the five years since that day, my life has changed massively. I never went to Yale, my family refused to pay for it when I came out to them; I have no contact with them anymore. But I made it out of Lima. I work as a photographer and a part-time songwriter; I earn good money, I live in a big apartment in a lovely part of Miami. My life has got so much better, even my love life. It was hard to move on to begin with, no-one I met lived up to Rachel. But I realised I need to get over her; she was with Finn and loves him. Not long after I'd accept that I'd met Julia, a beautiful, smart, funny brunette. We'd met at a nightclub, I thought she'd be another one-night stand that would remember me of Rachel but Julia wasn't going to let that happen so know it had turned into a 3 year relationship with a bar owner, who reminded me of Rachel. No matter how much time passes and how much I love Julia, no-one will ever be Rachel.
BUZZ BUZZ
"Julia did you forget your keys again. I swear woman I am going to get a make you wear the key as a necklace so you don't forget it!" I shout through the door and I make my way through the apartment to let Julia in.
"Seriously babe, I love you, but you are such a….." The rest of the words die on my tongue as I look at who is really stood behind my door. I look down at the tiny child at my door; I bend down so I can look the little boy in the eye.
"Hey mister, where's you mommy?" I ask, picking the child up, like I expected the little boy doesn't answer me. "Ok kiddo; let's go find your mommy or daddy." Grabbing my keys from the side, I carry the little man into the hall.
"Luke, where are you? Luke! LUKEMASON?" I hear a frantic voice shouting. I walk quickly towards the panic voice. Finally reaching the voice I find a blonde women running down the hall with tears falling down her face.
"Um, ma'am?" I call walking up behind her, she swings round and I can see the relief on her face as she stop LukeMason in my arms. She runs over to me and pulls her little boy into her arms. "He knocked on my door." I explain.
"Thank you, thank you so much." The woman says, kissing and hugging her little boy. "I'm so sorry, I was talking to the doorman and when I turned around Luke was gone." She says turning to look at me for the first time.
"It's okay. Okay little guy, try and stay with mommy this time, but if you get lost again, come knock on my door again." I say rubbing the little boy's hair. Turning away from the pair, I head back to my apartment hoping to never see that little boy at my door again.
Letting myself into my apartment, I lean against the back of the door, and blow out a puff of hair, "Drama" I mumble. But before I can walk two foot from the door,
Buzz Buzz.
"Not again." I mumble, opening the door again, I am surprised to see the woman and her son standing there this time. "I'm sorry, was something wrong?" I ask, totally confused about why this woman was at my door.
"You don't know who am I, do you, Quinn?" The woman says softly, putting her son down and looking up at me. I look at the woman, trying to place her face, but nothing is coming to me.
"How do you know my name? Who are you?" I asking, panicking now. The young lady steps towards me slightly.
"Please don't get upset. I just needed to see you again. Quinn it's me. Rachel!" I literally feel my jaw drop at her words. There is no way in hell this woman is Rachel, my Rachel.
"You aren't Rachel. I would recognise Rachel. I don't know who you are but please leave!" I say, trying to shut the door on this clearly confused woman. She pushes her way in before I can shut the door fully.
"Please Quinn, I know I don't look the same, but I swear it's me. Please, you have to believe me! Please." She begs, her eyes filling with tears.
"If you are Rachel Berry. Prove it! What was the last thing I ever said to you?" I ask, knowing only my Rachel will know the answer. The woman looks at me for a moment and I know I have her, she can't answer and her lies are falling apart. Stupid woman trying to fool me!
"The last thing you ever said to me was;" She begins stepping closer, "was that you loved me, but when I slapped you, you told me I was never meant to know, that you weren't stupid, you couldn't be because you weren't going to let your father be right." Rachel says, smiling sadly at me.
"Oh my God. It really is you!" I shout, pulling her into me and hugging her with everything I have, with all the love and pain I've felt over the last five years.
"What the hell are you doing here? After all this time!" I say suddenly remember the last five years. "You picked Finn, you married Finn, and you love Finn. So why? Why know?" I shout moving away from Rachel.
"Because…. Because…" Rachel says before looking down at her feet.
"Because what? What Rachel? Why are you here now after all this time?" I demand, getting anger now.
"BECAUSE I REGRET IT ALL!" Rachel finally shouts, "Because I regret it all." She says again, softly this time. "I regret picking Finn, and marrying him and staying with him. I regret not getting out of Lima, I regret letting him hold me back. I regret dying my hair to please that stupid man. I regret the whole damn marriage; the only good thing to come from it was LukeMason. "Rachel says pointing the little boy playing with my crystal animals. "I regret that day, I regret slapping you but most of all I regret not picking you." Rachel whisper, looking up at me for any sign of love.
"How you know you aren't too late?" I ask, trying to remind her and myself that I've dealt with her rejection for five years, "I have a girlfriend and a life. How do you know I didn't move on from you in the five years, FIVE Rachel, since you rejected me?" I say, trying to control my emotions.
"I don't ok. But I hoped! If you can look me in the eye and tell me you don't want me, and LukeMason. That you don't love me. Then I will take my son and leave you alone forever." Rachel saying stepping into my personal space. I look into her beautiful eyes, the eyes that haven't changed in five years, before looking over at her son.
"How can I raise his son?" I ask her, knowing full well that isn't even an issue. She turns to her son and smiles.
"LukeMason come here," She calls softly to her son; he obeys quickly and runs to his mommy's arms. "LukeMason isn't Finn's son. Because of Finn's problem we couldn't have a baby naturally. So I used a sperm donor, but Finn would never claim my son. Never allowed Luke to call him daddy." Rachel tells me playing with her son's hair, "But Luke has always had two parents." She says smiling. I look at her like she has grown to heads, if Finn doesn't accept the little boy how is that possible? Rachel ignores the look I give her and turns her attention to her son, "Luke, who is that?" She says pointing at me. The little boy looks at me for a moment before suddenly breaking out into a huge smile.
"Mama!" he shouts, point at me happily. Look back at Rachel, seriously confused now.
"How does he know me? And why is he calling me mama?" I ask her, she just laughs at me whilst putting Luke down. Walking right up to me, she takes me hand and looks into my eyes.
"Because you are my true love." She states simply. Like it is that simply, like the last five years didn't happen.
"It's not that simply, I have a girlfriend. I am happy." I tell her pulling away from her, trying not to get caught up in the moment.
"Do you love me?" she asks, not giving up as easily as last time.
"Of course I do, but….." I say trying once again to explain to her why this isn't simple.
"Well then it's simple. I know I hurt you and I don't deserve another chance, but I am asking you to please give me a chance. It won't be easy and you won't forgive me quickly. I know that, but I love you and you love me. All I am asking for is a chance. Please." Rachel begs fighting back the tears building up in her eyes. I stare at her and remember that painful day five years ago, I remember how much pain I'd felt in the last five year. What I've done to try and get over her. Could I put myself through that again?
"I can try." I whisper.
I hope you all enjoyed this. If not i'm sorry.
Some of you may not agree with the ending and that is fine. But for me it's perfect because I was in Rachel's shoes a few years ago. I had to pick between my partner and someone else who loved me. I made a decision, I picked to leave my partner for another person - and I honestly believe it was the right decision. I have no doubt that if I'd stay with my partner i would of end up heartbroken and alone not long down the line. I would of ended up like Rachel in this story. I changed my ending, like Rachel. The moral of my story is that, you make decision daily, you regret some, but in the end, you write your own ending.
Love H x