Elivier: ...Er...
Lloyd: What the hell?!
Elivier: ...Wow...
Lloyd: Is that all you can say?! YOU DISHONOR ME!!
Elivier: Don't talk like that!
Lloyd: And you aren't even going to bother telling people you've returned?
Elivier: Well... It is a new story... if I went ahead anf said that then any new readers wouldn't know what the heck I was talking about.
Lloyd: Not like anyone reads these anyway!
Elivier: They do too!! ...I think.
Lloyd: -not convinced-
Elivier: But i've had a few comments that have someting to do with these!!
Lloyd: DON'T LIE!!
Elivier: I'm not!! You meanine!! I'M REPLACING YOU!!
Lloyd: -Gasp- You wouldn't dare!!
Elivier: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!! STAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNN!!
-Stahn from Tales of Destiny appears-
Stahn: Huh?
Elivier: He is being mean!! -points at Lloyd-
Stahn: ... Do I know you?
Elivier: O.o You...you... YOU MEANIE!! HOW COULD YOU?!
Stahn: Eh?!
Lloyd: He can't replace me Elivier!! I'm far more huggable then him!!
Elivier: I HATE YOU BOTH!!
Lloyd&Stahn: ...
Elivier: I see how it is!! Well fine!! I'll just go be with someone who loves me! LIKE INU!! -storms off-
Lloyd: Wait... how is the story supposed to-
-Story shuts off-
Stahn: GAH!!
Lloyd: NUUUU!! ELIVIER!! COME BACK!! -runs after Elivier-
Stahn: ... Uh... I'll just disclaim this while Lloyd get Elivier back.
Stahn: Elivier doeasn't own anyone in this story or intro. All of us belong to Namco or whoever the hell crated us.
Elivier: STORY ON DANGIT!!
Kratos stared at the floor. His reflection stared back from the pool of crimson that had formed on the floor. An angel looked at Kratos blankly, waiting for his orders.
"Why did you paint the roses red?" Kratos asked.
"I thought that is what you whished Lord Kratos." The angel deadpanned.
"You fool! Now the queen will have our heads!" Kratos' voice rose with anger.
"NOOOO!!" the angle sobbed, placing his hands over his crotch. "I DON'T WANT TO LOSE MY MANHOOD!!"
"THEN GRAB THE WHITEOUT!!"
More angles rushed on the scene, each carrying a bucket of white paint. They began to dump it on the floor.
"Make sure it reaches the ceiling!" Kratos cried. "We don't want to lose our fingers from this cold!"
A shrill scream filled the hall. Kratos' head turned fast enough to give him whiplash.
"That is her!!" Kratos howled. "Quick! To the Kratos cave!!"
Angels began to flee the scene as fast as their wings would take them. Kratos threw open a broom closet and they all began filing in. As soon as the last angel was in Kratos slammed the door shut and locked it.
"HOSTAGES SECURED!!"
Yuan rushed into the room with a bald Mithos right behind him. Yuan yelped as he slipped on the newly painted floor and fell face first into one of the empty buckets. Mithos skidded to a halt, or at least he attempted to. He shoes lost their footing making him slam into Kratos. The auburn haired man held his smaller friend up, looking slightly lost.
"Mithos," he asked "why is your head so shiny?"
"Because that fool shaved my head!!" Mithos sputtered indignantly, jabbing a finger in Yuan's direction.
"No I didn't!!" Yuan cried, pulling the bucket off his now white head. "It was George I tell you!!"
"There is no such person!!" Mithos flailed wildly, forgetting that the human has behind him.
"Perhaps the cookies decided it was time for payback?" Kratos asked suddenly.
The room fell silent.
"OF COURSE!!" Mithos shouted. "THOSE BASTARDS!! I'LL SHOW THEM WHO OWNS THEM!!"
Mithos ran from the room, his head reflecting the light into Kratos' face, momentarily blinding the poor seraph.
"AW GOD!!" Kratos shouted, throwing his body around wildly.
"NUUUUUU!!" Yuan bellowed. "MY POOR KRATOS!! I'L SAVE YOU!!"
Yuan dove at Kratos, bringing him down to the floor. Kratos grunted and opened his eyes to glare heatedly at the cobalt.
"DA HELL YUAN?!" He shouted. "THIS WAS MY FAVORITE OUTFIT!!"
"I AM VICTORIOUS!!" Yuan decided to ignore Kratos' rants and instead held the man up in the air.
Kratos spun around slowly in the air, not even touching Yuan's hands. In the distance Kratos could hear a familiar tune playing.
DUH NUH NUH NUUUUUUUH!!
"ALL THAT IS HOLY!!" Kratos shrieked, his voice reaching a high soprano. Yuan clapped his hands. "That is the legend of Zeldsa treasure theme!! THIS IS TALES OF SYMPHONIA!! WFT MAN?!"
Yuan gasped, placing a hand over his mouth. He forgot that he was holding the human up, thus the magic was lost. Kratos fell to the ground in an undignified heap.
"Sooo…," Yuan drawled "what exactly did happen to Mithos' hair?"
"I replaced his shampoo with a highly concentrated acid." Kratos explained as he stood up and brushed himself off. "In a week or so his skin will turn green and we can call him fishman."
"I knew there was a reason I loved you." Yuan chuckled.
Kratos simply smiled before pulling the half-elf into a long passionate kiss.
YouknowIactuallydon'tnormallywritestufflikethis.Howodd.ButIhavetoadmitthatIenjoyittoapoint.
Lloyd stared at his dad confusedly. Kratos kept talking, going into details of the night he spent with Yuan. The brunet decided it was enough.
"Dad." Lloyd coughed. Kratos' attention snapped back at Lloyd, drool running down his cheek.
"What is it Lloyd?" Kratos asked, wiping the drool off with his white sleeve.
"Are you okay?"
"Fine Lloyd!" Kratos' voice was high and chipper.
"I… just can't imagine you… being so…so…"
"Sexual?" Kratos offered.
"No… well yes, but no. I can't imagine you being so weird!"
"Lloyd, we had four thousand years alone together. Things won't stay normal for very long."
Lloyd nodded slowly, knowing that the statement had to be true.
"…Now what?" The teen asked.
"NOWZ I IZ TEH RAPING U!!" Zelos shouted, popping out from a bush.
Lloyd shrieked like a little girl as Zelos threw him over a pink clad shoulder and jumped back into the bushes. Moans echoed through the forest.
Kratos stared at the spot in front of him where his son once stood. He was silent for a bit.
"HOW COME I NEVER THOUGHT OF THAT?!" he cried and ran off to find a certain cobalt haired half-elf.
Elivier: Review!
Lloyd: Oh don't be like that! We should at least give them a proper good-bye!
Elivier: ...I wouldn't be so pissy if it weren't for you!
Lloyd: You can't guilt trip me and you know it!
Elivier: ...I know..
Lloyd: Now be nice.
Elivier: Fine... Thank you for reading Craktasik!! Please review!
Lloyd: Much better!