Author's note:
Hello, reader! This little one-shot takes place at Bear's house several months after the events of Episode 25 (Return). For anyone who is confused about characters, Mariko is Subaru, and An is Tsukasa.
Chapter publish date:
15 Sep 2016
Summary:
An and Mariko spend time together, and Mariko ponders their relationship.
/ NIGHTMARE
Mariko Misono had tried desperately, though ultimately in vain, to sleep. She checked her watch, squinting to read the delicate numbers in the pale moonlight streaming through the window behind her.
Two in the morning, eh? She stretched out the arm that was wrapped around the small girl next to her very briefly, just enough to fight the soreness, and resumed her caresses. An was sleeping, a fact which Mariko had gleaned from the lack of responses and the gentle, even breaths that escaped her. Her head had found its way onto Mariko's shoulder hours ago when they were watching a movie together, and hadn't left it since. Mariko didn't enjoy the dull ache, but couldn't complain about the contact and the fact that An was actually comfortable enough for it.
I wonder if I should wake her up. It was winter break, but An surely had a sleep schedule that was being ruined by her having fallen asleep so early. It was around now that she'd usually be going to bed. Mariko knew this because most nights she'd be right there online with her, playing The World until drowsiness hit them both.
It was also probably uncomfortable to sleep in such a position.
Ah, but she's so peaceful when she's sleeping.
Mariko's thoughts drifted to their time in The World.
The game, and along with it, their lives, were much more peaceful now than they had been.
An in particular experienced the most change since the awakening of Aura. An had finally escaped the grasps of the painful relationships she had with her father and Morganna, and had found comfort and safety with their friend Bear. Bear, Ryo to them here in the real world, had welcomed An into his home, supporting her financially so she could get a good education and heal from her traumatic upbringing. An's father had given her up so easily…
Mariko winced at the thoughts of An's past, and forced her eyes and mind to focus on the present.
An was with her, safe and loved. She had friends, a new family, and, most importantly, a future...
Mariko turned her upper body towards An, embracing her with both arms as best she could. Perhaps reflexively, An embraced back, burying her face in Mariko's chest. She rested her chin upon the sleeping girl's head, closing her eyes and smiling.
The dark-haired girl's thoughts drifted to the last time they'd said goodbye.
"I want to focus on school, and I'm going to be living in the dorms, so..."
When An had hurried off for the dorms to get settled, she had left Mariko with merely a kiss on the cheek and a wave. Mariko remembered sitting in her room for hours afterward, wondering if she'd misunderstood An's feelings. She was worried, scared, and felt painfully vulnerable. Tsukasa had unlocked the door to her heart, and An had left it wide open.
At the end of the night, though, An had sent a message over The World's email system.
"Miss you already. Let's play TW tomorrow. I want to see you again. - Yours."
They had spent so much time together in The World, but when it came to the actual world…
She didn't mind waiting, if that's what An truly wanted. Not knowing, however, hurt more than she thought it would. Does she…?
Mariko felt something damp on her chest. An?
An was sobbing, clinging to Mariko's sweater while her body trembled.
"An!" Mariko tried to pull her away, to somehow wake her from her nightmare. She murmured gentle words in a way she remembered An using when Mariko had fallen asleep at her desk, back when An was still trapped inside The World.
"Stop, please," An wailed softly. Her grip weakened.
Mariko gently pulled An away from her chest, careful not to exert too much force. An's face was scrunched up in pain, brow furrowed and eyes streaming. She wiped An's tears and began to plant small kisses all around her face.
An's eyes fluttered open, only a hint of clarity in them. They darted around blindly until they met Mariko's. An focused her gaze on the deep brown eyes before her even as the tears continued to flow.
"I'm here. It's okay." She did her best to smile.
"Subaru?" Her voice was slurred with drowsiness as she placed her hand upon Mariko's cheek, her eyes searching deep into Mariko's.
"Tsukasa."
An's smile radiated through the tears.
It took about an hour, but An's breathing evened out, and her heart ceased its frantic racing. She was clinging to Mariko as if she were a life raft, and the world around them was an ocean.
Neither of them had spoken, but the silence didn't bother them. Both were content with each other's company in the warm house, free of the chilling cold that blew around just outside.
"Thank you." An spoke so quickly and suddenly that Mariko almost jumped.
"Hmm?"
"For being here."
Mariko blushed. "I wasn't just going to wake you up and-"
"That's not what I mean."
"What do you…?"
"For coming here. For not leaving. For staying with me." She caressed Mariko's hand as she spoke. "I was scared with me being away all the time you'd find somebody else, and all the time I spent studying you'd spend with them." She increased pressure slightly, as if to massage. "And I was really scared you would be upset that I'm not Tsukasa."
Mariko pulled her hand away and wrapped both arms around An's slim frame. She spoke slowly, thinking carefully about her words. "After everything we've been through, I…" She paused briefly, squeezing An gently for reassurance. "I'm just happy to know you're safe."
An sighed. "I could be doing so much more for you, though."
"I'd rather you keep doing what you are. You're building a future for yourself. Ryo tells me you're doing well in your classes, and your teachers keep calling him with praises." She grinned. "He also told me you're practically a prodigy."
An hid her face, cheeks hot. "I w-wouldn't go that far." Mariko's sweater muffled her voice.
"The most important thing right now should be preparing for the future. You have your whole life ahead of you. You're brilliant, and sweet, and caring, and you deserve whatever makes you happy. I don't want to do anything against your wishes."
An sighed lightly, forgetting her embarrassment. "I feel selfish."
"You're not selfish for focusing on school. Ryo and I think it's mature of you."
"But I'm putting you on the sidelines."
"I'm not going anywhere, An. I promise." She pulled An into her lap. It was a little surreal to see and feel her so close, but to feel nothing below her waist. A pleasant warmth began to spread through her body.
"M-M-Mariko!" An stammered, blushing furiously.
Did I go too far? "I'm sorry. I-" Before she could worry any more, though, An quickly snuggled close and wrapped her arms around Mariko's neck, settling her head against hers.
They sat like that for what seemed like a beautiful eternity. Neither of the girls felt the chill slowly creeping in through the window behind them, for they were in their own world. Mariko felt herself drifting away, and An's steady breathing kept her worries at bay. An nuzzled her head closer to Mariko's ear and hugged her tightly.
"An?" Mariko inquired groggily, voice heavy with contentment and sleep.
An didn't respond for a short while, but when she did, her voice was smooth and gentle.
"I love you…"
She pulled away from Mariko and lost herself in her deep brown eyes. Behind her, through the window, snow was sleepily finding its way to the ground, flakes heavy and soft. The full moon left a white glow over everything, and Mariko's face was no exception. Her face, though, was also bright with something else.
Hope. Relief.
"An…" She pulled An's hand to her face and kissed it on the knuckles, never breaking eye contact. Her smile widened, and with damp eyes, she finally uttered the words that had been haunting her for months.
"An, I love you."
Author's note:
Hope you gained some sort of enjoyment from reading this. It's my first ever fanfiction, and my second ever finished piece of creative writing. Any critique is welcomed and appreciated. If you see any glaring mistakes or OOC moments, please let me know and I'll fix it as soon as I can.
Thanks for reading!~