I woke up around 3am to my phone ringing. I wasn't paying close attention to it, though I knew it must be important if someone was calling so late, or well, early in the morning.
"Hello?"
"Nick?" I blinked, suddenly awake. It was her .My ex-girlfriend.
"Mi? Are you okay?"
"This is going to sound stupid, but can I ask you a favor?"
"Sure, anything."
"Can you come over?" There was something urgent in her voice. Something that scared me. She sounded worried, and afraid. I always worried about her. She used to be bubbly and happy all the time, but recently she'd gone through a dark phase.
"Of course."
"Thank you so much."
"Miley, be honest, are you okay?"
"Yeah. I just...well...never mind." I got out of bed and snuck downstairs. I would've just walked, her new house was just a matter of blocks from mine, but I didn't want to waste any time. Something about her just worried me. I got to her house and let myself in. She always left her back door unlocked. I walked through her kitchen. It smelled like new paint. The first thing she did when she moved in was paint almost all the rooms, to make it feel more like her own.
"Miley?"
"I'm in my room." When I got in there I found it to be dark. And silent. I looked at her. She gave me a smile. I looked at her and could tell she'd been crying. But the smile she gave me seemed so genuine. Which scared me even more.
"Mi, tell me. What's wrong?"
"Nothing. I just have a stupid favor to ask you."
"Anything. You know I still care about you." She smiled again. It sent chills down my spine.
"Will you sing me to sleep?"
"What?"
"I can't sleep. And remember? When we used to be together, you'd sing and I'd fall right asleep."
"I remember."
"So, will you?"
"Come here." I didn't know what I was doing. But I held her, close to me. I felt her warmth, and I sang to her. At first I could feel her crying against my chest, and then nothing. I felt her drifting off to sleep. Soon I felt myself going too.
When I woke up I was on the floor. It didn't surprise me. I toss and turn a lot in my sleep, and I fell asleep so close to the edge of Miley's bed. I knew something wasn't right when I woke up, I could feel it. And sadly, before I noticed, I knew what had happened.
I saw her laying there in her bed. I didn't have to touch her to know that her skin would be cold. For the moment I felt emotionless. I didn't know what to think, or what to feel. I looked over on the bedside table and saw a single piece of paper with song lyrics on it. I recognized the song right away. It was a song from the '80s.
"Don't feel bad for me,
I want you to know.
Deep in the cell of my heart,
I really want to go.
There is another world.
There is a better world."
After reading that I looked over at her again. This time I saw her in a new light. She looked almost perfect, laying there. And while it would be hard, and I knew the tears would come eventually, I felt the peacefulness. I took comfort in that she was finally happy. So there I sat, on the edge of her bed, looking at her with a sad smile on her face. I knew I would never understand what she was feeling. I knew I would never understand what she did. I knew that there would be questions, and emptiness deep in the bottom of my heart for the rest of my life. But as I gave her one final kiss on her cheek I felt calm. There is a better world, and she is in it. I knew that one day, no matter how far away that day was, I'd join her. And that was enough to keep me going.
Whoa. Sorry this is so dark. I was listening to the song Asleep by The Smiths today, and I got the idea. I'd really been wanting to write something like this. I lost a friend to suicide just a few months ago, and this song always gave me some sort of comfort.
P.S. I discovered this song from reading The Perks of Being a Wallflower a few months ago. I'd totally recommend it. It's an amazing book.