A/N: wow another story from me because I already have enough on my plate here you go

Of all the stupid dumb things that Alfred had done in his life, getting his pants caught on the spear of a hotel fence was near the top. He had a feeling he looked pretty comical, pants torn around the thighs and belt loops ruined. It was one thing to joke about failing to jump a fence, it was another to joke about failing to keep his only decent pair of pants.

He was so not in the mood for this.

Two hundred years ago he would have thought vampires to be a little more graceful. Turns out that was a big fat lie the small colony towns told just to keep the kids scared, because every vampire as young as Alfred was doing the same reckless shit teenagers always did- although for Alfred it tended to last several centuries longer.

"I thought Levi's were supposed to last," Alfred muttered to himself, patting down the rips in his jeans. He wondered when he was allowed to graduate to Dracula Level dress code.

Then again, the cape might be a little much.

Alfred stretched out, glancing at the dark lit pool. A couple of blue lights were on, but other than that the pool was dark and inviting. Exactly what a prowler of the night would want after a hot, stuffy day of staying huddled in a dark, tropical hole.

Tossing clothes off, Alfred jumped into the pool. Perhaps his midnight dip was illegal, but it was no less satisfying.

A long sigh escaped him as he drifted on his back. Alfred closed his eyes, dipping below the water. Not needing to breathe had its benefits. Being undead had its perks.

Alfred shuddered and snapped up, floating on top of the water as he glanced around. The water was disturbed, like there was something swimming underneath him. Alfred had a feeling there wasn't going to be a wayward fish in a Florida hotel pool thirty miles inland.

He slipped beneath the water line, looking around. While he couldn't see very well, it didn't sting his eyes like it would a human's.

Except not seeing very well didn't keep him from seeing the very angry merman two inches away from his face.

Bubbles escaping him, Alfred choked and rose above the water, swimming towards the shallow end. He flopped up on land, choking up water. "Shit-" He caught himself and covered his mouth, eyes wide as the merman leered from the water.

Well. That was something he hadn't been expecting.

"Wow…" Alfred exhaled. He'd never seen a merman before. It was a merman right? There was something off about his eyes and his nose, something not quite…focused about it. "Are you using a glamour?"

The merman disappeared below the water once more, floating off to the deep end once more. Alfred followed along the edge of the pool. "Hey-" Alfred knelt down at the deep end. "Hey, you speak English?"

Bubbles rose to the surface and the wide head of the merman appeared once more. The width slowly tapered. Alfred recognized the glamour and sat still. "Hey, do you speak English?"

Silence followed, but Alfred knew the look in the merman's eyes. Curiosity- curiosity and irritation at that.

"Not well."

Alfred nodded. At least he knew he could speak

"Do you like…live in the pool? That must get pretty exciting in the morning." Alfred slowly sat back on his haunches, watching as the merman darted below the water a few times. He had a look about him that implied little to no social experience.

"Stay here at night," the merman bubbled, his webbed hands slowly reaching up to raise up a little out of the water. He was built well, as mermen usually were. Swimming constantly made someone strong.

"No, like…how did you get washed into the pool? Like, Aquamarine style? Since you can't exactly walk- are those legs?"

The merman dunked down, kicking two very humanoid feet above the water, then a tail.

"Hoooly shit," Alfred breathed, leaning forward. He grunted, jumping back as the merman popped up again.

"I walk. Stay on land during day, sleep in pool at night." The merman gripped the edges of the pool and hoisted himself up on land, scaring Alfred further back. He pointed to himself with his olive finger. Alfred kept an eye on his sharp nails. "Name Ivan."

Alfred kept an eye on those greedy, sharp teeth. Shark. He was definitely dealing with a shark.

"So what's with the…y'know…" Alfred eyed the merman's legs. "Y'know. The…legs."

The merman shrugged. "Always had legs." He held up his hands, that Alfred noticed were much less webbed than the usual merman's. "You call me something else. Not sure word, but you have word for it."

Alfred watched him for a moment, examining him from head to tail- and to toe, since Ivan appeared to have both. What was he talking about? They had a word for- for what? Mutations?

It clicked. "Chimera. You're a chimera."

Ivan shrugged. "That. I am that, I suppose. Becomes very convenient sometimes, but very hard others."

"So you live in a…hotel pool."

"Stay here at night." Ivan nodded. He was eyeing Alfred, something like hunger in his eyes. Alfred didn't trust it- a merman who hadn't eaten was a danger to everyone around them. "Sometimes stay other place."

He jabbed a finger at Alfred, making him jump back. "You're leech."

Quite offended, Alfred furrowed his brow and made a face. "Leech? Are you kidding me?" Probably one of the most offensive things to call a vampire. Even nightcrawler was better than leech. Not to mention it was way old fashioned. Most days if someone wanted to offend him they just called him Dracula or something. Hell, that was even a compliment sometimes.

"You suck blood. You are leech."

"Hey, that's a pretty offensive. I get that you're trying to like…interact, but it'd be nice if you didn't call me a leech." Alfred didn't like being associated with a worm that fed off the strong. He was a predator, a deadly, lithe animal that hunted for fun and for food. "I prefer being called like…a tiger or something."

"You are leech. You feed from others." The merman's fingers jabbed further at Alfred, snickering. It sounded like a gargle. "It nice that you think so strong and important."

"At least I'm not stuck sleeping in a hotel pool at night."

"Sometimes I sleep in kiddy pools."

"That's not much better."

Ivan shrugged. "Less chlorine." He rubbed his cheeks. "Like breathing in smoke all night here. Imagine sleeping in smoky room. Breathing in, all night."

"Why don't you like, y'know… Go back to the ocean. You could walk there in a night. Hell, you could find a river to swim downstream like a mile from here." Alfred moved into a crouch, eye to eye with the merman. Something was fishy here. No pun intended.

Ivan leered and slithered back into the pool. He resumed the state of peering at Alfred half submerged beneath the blue waters.

"Did I hit a touchy subject?" Alfred couldn't help but feel a little smug about it. "Come on, get out of there, slinky." He knelt beside the edge and reached a hand out to splash the water, only to yank it back as strong jaws snapped at the water beneath him. "Jesus H Christ!" He supposed that's what he got for poking the bear. Or the shark, as it was.

Ivan swam further down, further back to the deep end of the pool. Alfred had a feeling he didn't want to come back this time.

"I probably deserve that," Alfred muttered to himself, slowly rising to his feet. He glanced down at himself, making a face. Despite how he couldn't feel the cold, a few parts of him still reacted the way a naked body normally does in cool weather.

Huffing, Alfred snatched a forgotten towel off the hotel lawn chair. Sometimes merfolk could be so snippy. Not that Alfred had ever met a merperson before this. He'd always been pretty landlocked, and freshwater merfolk were scarce.

Alfred shook his head and dried off before tossing the towel into the pool. "Hey, get out of the pool for a bit, why don't you. And maybe you should head back to ocean!" Alfred tossed on his ripped pants and his band tee before vacating the pool area.