A/N: Ok so this is slightly graphic and deals with sensitive materials in the mentioning of domestic violence. Its not a subject that is taken lightly and I would urge anyone who is suffering domestic violence to speak out and get support, its not easy for children to live with domestic violence and its not as easy as people might think to leave an abusive partner. To those who are suffering you are not alone.

Song is Fallen by Sarah McLachan and it seemed to fit the mood of what I was writing its a song of falling and getting up again, of never giving up no matter what.

Heaven bent to take my hand

And lead me through the Fire

Be the long awaited answer

To a long and painful fight

Truth be told I've tried my best

But somewhere along the way

I got caught up in all there was to offer

And the cost was so much more than I could bear

As she stared out of the window at the rain pouring down, she couldn't help the sigh that escaped her lips. Of course it was raining, she loved the rain, rain was for dancing, but she was stuck inside. She couldn't go out even if she wanted to, being 8 months pregnant and on bed rest sucked. Her baby would be worth it though, every single boring moment of it. It was she supposed what came of having a high stress job, being an FBI agent was no picnic but she loved her job and every difficult, dangerous moment that went with it. She had proven over and over that she could handle herself in field, that she was one of the boys as it were. Still knowing that her team trusted her, quirkiness and all, didnt exactly help her right now. She wanted to go out in the rain dammit she wanted to put the music on high and go out and dance in the rain. She was whining she knew that but she had been alone all day and well being alone did things to you. She laughed inwardly at that, she really was losing it. With a sigh she turned back to her laptop, she was working on a case for the team, doing only the as they put it 'techie' stuff they couldn't do. In all honesty she was so bored she would trade places with a dancing monkey right now, or just a monkey, hell she wasnt picky, it wasnt the work that was boring her perse just that she missed the banter and interaction she was used when doing said work. Working from home was gonna be the bane of her existence. She shifted again, getting comfortable and sighed as she felt the familiar pressure on her bladder, flamin typical she'd just got comfortable and now she had to move...again. She slowly lifted herself off the couch and waddled into the bathroom, on exiting the bathroom she lifted the faded grey hoodie off the hook of the door. Smiling softly she thanked the gods that the owner of said hoodie had broad shoulders, making it possible for her to still wear said hoodie. She pulled it over her head and inhaled the scent that used to haunt her dreams. The letters on the front of the hoodie proclaimed QUANTICO, faded but still there none the less. She had to smile at what she knew was his name on the back, a name she would take one day if he had his way. It was stubbornness on her part she knew, but her childhood had taught her that marriage was not a venture worthwhile embarking on. It had destroyed her parents and left her alone in the world.

Though I've tried, I've fallen

I have sunk so low

I've messed up better

I should know

So don't come 'round here

And tell me I told you so

-Flashback-

We all begin with good intent

Love was raw and young

We believed that we could change ourselves

The past can be undone

She sat at the top of the stairs, knees pulled up to her chest, tiny arms hugging them to her body tight. They were screaming again, soon the crashing would start again. Oh she hated it so much when the crashing started. Last time there was crashing, she had woken up to find mommy had a bruise on her eye and was walking funny. It never used to be like this, mommy and daddy never used to scream like this at each other. Mommy had said that they were gonna have a big party, a celerbration cos mommy and daddy loved each other lots and then they wouldn't shout at each other any more. Mommy was right in a way they didn't shout anymore, now they just screamed and crashed things. She tried to block it out, her hands lifted to her ears and she pressed hard hoping it would stop her hearing it, it worked until the crashing started. She bit her lip hard, so she wouldn't cry. She couldn't make a noise, daddy didn't like it when she heard them screaming and crashing, last time he had smacked her hard cos she was meants to be in bed asleep. Tears under control she turned her attention back to her parents, and frowned, it was quiet too quiet, mommy was whispering, why was mommy whispering. She stood carefully and started to make her way down the stairs when there was a loud bang, she startled and slipped down a step or two, she was almost at the bottom when there was another loud bang. She slipped over the last step and froze, that was a very loud noise and now it was very quiet. She stood there frozen for a time until she decided she needed to check on mommy. She moved quickly to daddys study and paused at the door daddy had smacked her last time she went in his study, but mommy was in there and they weren't screaming any more and she was scared.

But we carry on our backs the burden time always reveals

In the lonely light of morning

In the wound that would not heal

It's the bitter taste of losing everything, I've held so dear


The door opened slowly and she peeked round it cautiously. Her eyes widened in horror at the scene in front of her, it was a scene no child should ever have to see and it would shape the rest of her life in many ways. She ran to over to her mommy and fell to her knees beside her. Mommy wasn't moving and there was lots of sticky blood by her, she shook her and shook her but she still wasn't moving, she called her and shouted for her but still mommy didn't move. Looking over at her daddy she saw he also was lay by a pool of sticky blood. The room smelt funny, it never smelt like that before, she ran to her daddy and tried to shake him but he wasn't moving either and her body racked with sobs, she was trying to hold in. Why wouldn't mommy and daddy wake up, what had mommy told her if anything bad happened, she had to call a number on a phone. She ran to the phone and thought for a moment, mommy said call 911 and so with shaking fingers she did.

-End of Flashback-

A/N2: Ok so I was nervous about posting this so hit the button and let me know what you think :)