Skirmish

by Yukitsu

Disclaimers: YYH is not mine.

Warning: Do not take this seriously. This is a spur of the moment thing, probably pointless and plotless. --

This is dedicated to Genki-chan, otherwise known here in FF.net as Kantomon. A snippet for one of the gold coins in the valley of coal.

" yadda " - dialogue

' yadda ' - thoughts/italics

YADDA - bold, emphasis.

-----

She was a strong woman, clearly from where Sensui Shinobu, her son, got his character from.

"Shinobu, honey, I'm a bit bothered by your..." A pause; tastefully chosen words. "Choice of company."

Shinobu Sensui. Rekai Tantei extraordinaire, reduced to blinking away as his mother -- the woman talking to him like she would a child -- gestured for him and his companion to take a seat. Itsuki politely smiled, and it took the slight, resigned tug from Shinobu to get him moving, sticking his rear comfortable on the loveseat. How... appropriate. Idly, he watched as the woman blanched one their choice of seat, obviously expecting that they would have taken the couch across from her.

"Yes, mother?"

"Your friend, Itsuki, was it? You seem kind of close." She was choosing her words carefully, implying everything, but as discreet as the God of Death. She glanced at the said teenager, momentarily meeting his golden eyes. Such odd colored eyes....

"Yes, mother, we are."

With the calm she had about her, no one would have guessed that just the night before, she nearly screamed her head off. Alas, such was the fate of a mother barging into the room of her son only to see him being -pinned down- on the bed by the slight-looking man before her.

The pair looked like they were about to have sex too....

She coughed discreetly at the blatant answer, wondering how on earth her son could admit such a thing without even flinching.

"I don't think you understood me, Shinobu, dear. What relationship do you have, exactly?"

Itsuki shifted in his seat, vaguely wondering what the point of the thing was. Humans, such odd creatures. He was half way between being bored, and interested. Now if only the woman would cut to the chase already. Dilly dallying was such a waste of time....

"We're partners, mother," Shinobu replied, slightly tilting his head to the side, as if to say "What's going on?"

Rekai Tantei extraordinaire, and he didn't have any idea what was going on at all. The night before, after his mother had caught the pair on a particularly skittish mood, and she had screamed her lungs out, Itsuki had merely smiled at him as one would do a child -- again -- and closed the door on her face. Personally, Shinobu Sensui was slightly confused. Itsuki was rather affectionate the night before, and knowing his partner, a good tussle was in order. What was wrong with two perfectly able boys -- although Itsuki wasn't human, so he should be, but his mother didn't know that -- having something that vaguely resembled fun?

"Partners...?"

"Yes, ma'am. Partners." Itsuki answered for Shinobu, the corner of his mouth twitching up in amusement. Now how was she going to react to that? There're only so much suggestive thoughts a woman can take in the light of her only son's sexuality.

"Erm. Partners?" she said slowly, her tone slightly rising.

Anytime now....

"Partners." Shinobu stated flatly. What was wrong with that word? The tone his mother used was one of disbelief; as if she ground the word around in her mouth first before swallowing it and burping it out. They were partners. To say they were friends would be a bit too much, after all, Itsuki was a youkai, and he, a tantei. They weren't enemies either, since Itsuki was his constant companion, due to his sentence for parole. What were they? Certainely not lovers, even if they sometimes were... sweet. Maybe father and son? Or in Itsuki's case, mother? Strange.

"Uhm...."

'I can see it. She'll ask 'partners in what way' next' Itsuki thought, smiling to himself. Humans were predictable. It was probably why most humans were boring. But then, Shinobu was always an exception. He couldn't wait til his 'partner' grew old enough for him to take the next step.

"...Partners...? In what way?"

Now that question was tricky. Shinobu narrowed his eyes in thought, pursing his lips as he looked for the right explanation. He couldn't very well just go "We save the Humanworld against demons. Coincidentally, Itsuki is a demon, and he's my partner because he's on parole because he was a criminal I caught for the Spiritworld."

THEN his mother would really have a fit. Or maybe she wouldn't understand at first.... Humans tend to react to such with denial, after all. People are weird.

Now how to explain....

"We're partners in that martial arts school we go to together," Itsuki answered.

'Took the words right out of my mouth. Lifesaver.'

"Oh...."

He couldn't help himself. Despite his better judgement, Itsuki draped an arm around his partner's shoulders comfortably, deliberately pretending to not notice the look the woman was drilling on him.

Shinobu, pretty used to it already, didn't even blink.

"Err.... And what you were doing lastnight when I err...."

"Caught us redhanded?" Itsuki suggested, watching her blush slightly in amusement.

Shinobu couldn't relate.

Itsuki paused.

The older woman discreetly cleared her throat.

"Yes, Itsuki-kun."

Shinobu tilted his head again.

Itsuki chuckled.

She tensed.

Itsuki paused for effect.

"Wrestling?"

She nearly fainted from nervous breakdown. She caught herself quickly, enough, and swiftly recomposed herself.

"I see. Nothing else?" It escaped her mouth before she could quell the question. The way Itsuki kept on acting affectionately towards his son, the way Itsuki looked like -- not meant to be offensive -- a wuss.... It was all so wrong!

"Hmm. How would you react if I were to ask you for Shinobu's hand in marraige?"

Now THAT, Shinobu couldn't help BUT understand. He spat the water he had been in the process of drinking, liberally messing the pristine table in front of them.

"Itsuki!" An indignant yell, a violent blush, a malevolent glare.

At that, Shinobu's mother really DID faint.

"Mother!" Shinobu made his way around the wet table and gently slapped his mother awake. His demon partner didn't even bother to stand up, too busy laughing to himself to actually care.

"I apologize, I really do," he said, struggling to regain his composure. Who knew humans were this fun to harrass! At the site of Shinobu's rather enraged expression, he cracked up again.

"Wha--?" she mumbled, her eyes fluttering open.

"Ah, she lives," was Itsuki's off-hand comment.

"Shinobu, dear?"

"Yes, mother? Are you fine?" The son helped the mother sit up, propping her against the pillows of the couch.

"Yes, yes I am. For a while there, I imagined you in a big white wedding dress.... Oh, what a bad dream!"

And once again, Shinobu totally missed the point. "Mother, if we were to get married, I think Itsuki would be the one wearing the dress."

"...."

How Itsuki loved how Shinobu Sensui's mind worked! He bent over slightly, laughing his head off and wiping the mirth away from his eyes. "Oh my...."

After a few more seconds of Shinobu's mom hyperventilating, Shinobu looking around with question marks dancing on his head, and Itsuki laughing away, the latter finally got his composure back.

'This is too amusing'

"Ne, Shinobu, you're right, I'd probably look better in a dress than you would."

"Of course," the aformentioned Tantei answered automatically, making sure his mother wasn't going off to lala-land again. No go. She looked like she was soaring from what he just said.

"And you'd look stunning in a tuxedo."

"Maybe."

Why was it that his mother looked slightly green...?

The last blow. Itsuki cackled to himself inside, mentally patting Shinobu for innocently riding with his fun.

"Our kids would be handsome."

"I guess," At that, Shinobu paused. "What are you talking about?"

"Oh, nothing, nothing. Plans for the future, perhaps. Now go tend to your mother, she looks like she's in dire need of smelling salts," Itsuki waved the question away and gestured to the woman, who had once again fainted.

"I don't get it...." The brunt of the implication was lost on the teenager, so intent was he on reviving his comatose mum.

"Oh, you will." This time, Itsuki's evil cackle was heard out loud.

"Idiot."

At that point, Mrs. Sensui awoke, as woozy as before. "Nggg...."

"What is wrong with you, mother? You keep on fainting." She was as bad as that demon Sensui and Itsuki got rid of the other day. Stand, die, stand, die, sit, sit, bark, stand, die, stand, bark, die.

"You.... you!"

"So, what do you say to being my children's grandmother, Sensui-san?" The long haired demon idly asked, running elegant fingers through his long, silky hair.

At that, the older woman froze. Shinobu raised an eyebrow and demanded what was going on.

"We-well...."

"Too bad Shinobu-kun doesn't have siblings. I'm sure our future sons and daughters would have loved having them as aunts and uncles."

"...."

"Eh?"

Smiling to himself, Itsuki pretended to check his nails. "Also, where would you want us married? In a church? Judge? Or are you jewish?"

Despite himself, Shinobu once again gave his suggestion. "How about Koenma?"

"Oh! Good idea! I love how you think! I'm not sure if he'd want me wearing a dress, though." Itsuki's lips pursed.

"Eh?"

THUMP went Mrs. Sensui's body.

"Mother!" What in the world was happening? Was his mother ill?

A mouthed word. A despair-laced moan.

"No..." Her body shuddered in her son's arms, the word escaping her as she headed off to la la land once more.

"Oops, I guess she doesn't approve of us after all." The demon cracked a toothy grin at the fourteen year old Tantei, shrugging.

"What do you mean by us?"

"I told you. You'll know." Having enough fun, Itsuki quickly followed the statement with a cackle.

------

Ah, there we go.. ()

May 16, 2004