Hello there! :)
I decided to take a short break from "A Slave Of The Fear", and took up a try in some comedy.
I mean, it's, like, my first attempt ever so I beg your forgiveness if it's not funny at all. :(
Anakin is about 16 or 17 here.
Reviews are always welcome, please, tell me what you think about this form of fanfiction. I do hope it's at least a bit funny, or make you smile a little. :)
Disclaimer: None of this belongs to me. *sniff*
~~~o*o~~~
"Anakin!" Obi-Wan Kenobi walked into the apartment shared with his Padawan. His face was emotionless, however, he had some news. "Anakin! Where for Force's sake are you?" he called but found the dark living room totally empty.
He looked around, checked the kitchen, then, the bathroom, but his apprentice was nowhere to be seen. He sighed and concentrated. Why is he always nowhere around when needed?
Just then, he heard him. Or rather, his loud snoring, coming out from his bedroom. He shook his head in disbelief. It was noon. How one can sleep that long?
"Anakin!" he called once again and opened the door to his Padawan's room.
He found him not in his bed, but next to it, on the floor. The boy was on his back, among droid parts and some clothes. He wondered how this boy is even able to live here. The room looked like a battlefield. After a huge explosion.
"Anakin, in the name of Yoda, wake up!" he stepped in and immediately tripped over a dead plant, which Anakin surely forgot to water.
Landing on his knees, he cursed. Oh, a day will come when this room is clean. And hopefully, this day comes now.
He looked around and didn't risk standing up. He crawled to get to his apprentice.
"Anakin, wake up!" he shook his arms firmly.
"Mhm, they are... coming." the teenager moaned and only turned his back on Obi-Wan.
"What? Anakin, come on!" no effect.
The Knight sighed and decided to take up more brutal actions.
"You have five seconds, Anakin." he warned and used the Force to grab a bottle of water from the windowsill. "One..." he began but already knew counting won't be effective, for his apprentice was deep asleep. "Fine, then. You made me do that." he moved closer, grinning evilly.
Anakin snored a response and shifted. Obi-Wan hasn't waited long, he emptied the bottle, causing Anakin to get to his feet almost immediately.
"Wha--" he gasped for air and saw who interrupted him. "Master!" Obi-Wan was grinning, with now the empty bottle in his hand. "I don't remember asking for it."
"It's because you never ask, Anakin." he smirked and put the bottle down. "Time to get up. I need to talk to you."
"Whatever happened it wasn't me!" he automatically raised his hands in defeat and looked at his Master, who was trying to stand up.
"Nothing happened, Padawan. We just need to talk. We have a job to do." after two tries, he finally managed to stand up without stepping on anything.
"Phew, good." he sighed. "I was worried Master Windu realised who took his speeder." he whispered still a bit sleepily.
"No, I just want to-- wait you stole Master Windu's speeder?" he turned to him with his stern look. The boy swallowed nervously, realising what he'd said.
"Well, Master..." he began and got up, deciding that it was the last time he'd fallen asleep on the floor. His back hurt. "I wouldn't say I stole it. I simply borrowed it because of... some important matters."
"Important matters? I'm afraid to ask..." he murmured.
"That's a funny story, you know, Master?"
"Can't wait to hear it." Anakin seemed not to get the sarcasm.
"You were at this boring meeting with Master Yoda and I was hungry... I looked up for some food but my favourite cereals were out. Normally, I would wait for you but my stomach just screamed for them. Since you took away keys from my speeder--"
"I took them because you were racing civilised people on the streets--"
"As I was saying..." Anakin quickly interrupted. "I had no keys and Master Windu happened to forget about his own and left them in his speeder." he finished and smiled innocently. "As you can see now, it wasn't stealing but taking an advantage from a certain situation."
"How many times I have to tell you not to take Master Windu's things without permission?" Obi-Wan sighed and shook his head in disapproval, folding his arms over his chest.
"Uhh... One last time?" he smiled, making his most puppy alike eyes. "Oh come on, Master! He forgot the keys! It's just as if he asked me to do it."
Obi-Wan only sighed again and turned towards the door. Mace won't be happy when he hears about this.
"Take a quick shower and join me in the living room. It's our big day today." he smiled.
"Big day?" the boy frowned.
"Yes. We're doing some cleaning today." Obi-Wan chuckled happily.
"Cleaning? Seriously, Master?" he glanced at the man, whose face suddenly turned deadly serious. "I mean, cleaning sounds good!" he chuckled nervously, wondering if his Master was someone to be afraid of during cleaning days.
Obi-Wan only smiled widely and nodded, walking out of the dark room.
"Excellent." Anakin murmured and looked around. "My Master is a pedantic maniac."
"I heard it!"
"It was a compliment!"
~~~o*o~~~
As Obi-Wan thought, Anakin's quick shower lasted at least an hour, so he managed to make lunch, eat lunch, and clean up after lunch. He has just finished washing the dishes when his Padawan emerged from the bathroom doors.
"And now, who's the maniac here?" he asked calmly, not bothering to look up.
"It's not the same. I don't freak out when I don't take a shower after a sparring, unlike you."
"I just don't like being sweaty, okay? This is uncivilized."
"I don't mind some sweat."
"Yes, Anakin. I know. And it's not something to be proud of, actually."
"You're impossible." he rolled his eyes and reminded himself about the reason why he is out of bed now. "So, what do you want me to do, Master?"
"You can do laundry. Your clothes are all over the apartment."
"Boring." he groaned and sat on the couch, turning on the TV. Obi-Wan shook his head and settled between Anakin and the screen. "Hey! I am watching it!"
"You will watch after you do laundry."
"But it's on TV only at noon..."
"So you'll watch it tomorrow. It's not like this is something interesting anyway."
"Not true, Master. It's educational."
Obi-Wan frowned and looked at the silly-looking cartoon.
"What's educational in the yellow brick living under water?" he furrowed his eyebrow.
"First of all, it's not a brick but a sponge."
"And what's educational in a living sponge?"
"Uh, well..." he looked down, defeated.
"See? Laundry. Now." he said and turned the TV off.
Again, the boy rolled his eyes and heavily, even dramatically, sighed.
"Fine." he lazily stood up and gave his Master a look, hoping he could make Obi-Wan change his mind.
"No, don't look at me like that. It isn't going to work."
But he made the sweetest face as possible.
"N-no! Not this time, Padawan." he turned his face away to avoid this gaze.
"Okay, fine." Obi-Wan smiled proudly. Anakin only snorted and headed to the bathroom.
"While you will be there, you can at least take your batteries from the sink. They shouldn't be lying there just like that."
"No, no, Master." the boy smiled. Obi-Wan knew it was time to prepare for another silly excuse. "I didn't throw them there just like that. They are supposed to be there. The Force willed it."
"No, don't involve the Force in your mess, Anakin."
"You shouldn't question the will of the Force, Master."
"Just... just do it and stop arguing with me."
The teenager rolled his eyes and walked into the bathroom.
"You don't know what it means to be funny." he heard him murmur.
"I heard it, too!"
"So I'm glad that your hearing's okay, Master!"
Obi-Wan shook his head in resignation and looked around. He frowned and noticed that his lightsaber isn't pinned to his belt. He turned around and cursed silently.
"Anakin?" he called.
"What now, Master?" his head emerged from the room and their eyes met.
"Where's my lightsaber?"
"Oh, Master, have you lost the weapon of your life?" he grinned and chuckled quietly. Obi-Wan sent him a stern, warning gaze.
"Where is it, Anakin?"
"How should I know, Master? It's your lightsaber."
"Padawan, it's not the time for joking. Tell me where it is!"
"Don't worry, Master. It's in my room."
"In your room." his eyebrow furrowed and he folded arms over his chest.
"Yeah."
"I think it is lost, after all." he sighed and stroked his beard. Anakin snorted.
"Stop being dramatic, Master."
"I'm not being dramatic, I just think it's dangerous to even go there."
"Just do it and stop complaining. It is on my wardrobe."
"It's interesting that you have a wardrobe since all of your clothes are outside it."
"I don't have time to put them in there."
"You know this isn't the brightest excuse of yours. You are able to make up something more creative."
"I will try harder next time, Master." he gave him a proud, sweet smile.
Obi-Wan hasn't answered.
Instead, he approached the door to his Padawan's room and inhaled.
"Anakin, if I don't return, Master Adi Gallia was interested in training you." he stated.
"Don't say that, Master. You know I wouldn't replace you for anyone else!"
"Well, yes, if I fall and break my skull, you'll have to." he sighed and without additional words, not waiting for Anakin's response, just stepped in that blasted room.
He accidentally kicked the same plant he had tripped over earlier. He exhaled, hoping nothing will eat him here, although that old, bitten hamburger on the windowsill looked quite dangerous.
He looked at the wardrobe. His lightsaber, indeed, was lying there, high and beyond his reach. He used the Force and caught it, touching something clammy.
It was a gum. An old, chewed gum.
"Urgh, how uncivilized." he murmured and walked out, in need to give someone a lecture. "Padawan, come here for a moment!"
He heard a deep sigh and then, saw his apprentice with a tired smirk on his face.
"Care to explain this?" the Knight pointed to the gum. Anakin swallowed.
"See? I told you, you'd find it." he smiled innocently, trying to look like a puppy again.
"What is this?"
"This is a gum, Master. Something you put into your mouth and--"
"I know how the gum works, Anakin. My question is, what is it doing on my lightsaber?" he glanced at the boy, now clearly angry.
"Remember, Master, that anger leads to the Darkside and--"
"Anakin."
The boy sighed.
"I accidentally stepped on it and it got stuck to the carpet. I couldn't unstick it so I used your lightsaber to help myself a bit."
Silence lasted a few seconds.
"Wait a minute... you used my lightsaber to get rid of the gum?"
"Yes, Master."
"I can't believe it... you are being serious right now."
"Yes, Master."
He blinked.
"I don't know what shocks me more - the fact that you have a carpet or that you used my lightsaber to do such a creative thing."
"At least you aren't bored with me."
"Oh, yes. This is so reassuring." he said sarcastically and gave his weapon another look. "Why couldn't you use yours?"
"Uh... you see, Master..." he laughed nervously and scratched the end of his neck. "I kinda left it in the Sparring Arena yesterday."
Obi-Wan sighed and made a silent facepalm. He closed his eyes, searching for good, Jedi-way words. He found none.
"Why haven't you told me?"
"You haven't asked." he shrugged and turned away to continue laundry.
"Wait, no, I'm not finished yet!" he tried to stop him.
"I'm doing laundry, Master, as you wanted me to." he smirked. "Why aren't you cleaning up? It was your fantastic idea."
"To your information, I was about to help you." he stated and kneeled to take some of Anakin's cloaks from the couch. He wondered why his apprentice has so many of them.
Sighing helplessly, he headed straight to the bathroom.
"Anakin, I have your cloaks."
"Master, watch out for the--" in one second, Obi-Wan slipped over and landed on his arse with a loud 'whoosh'. All of the cloaks flew into the air and fell onto the floor, all over the room. "Puddles." his Padawan finished, holding his laugh off.
"In the name of--" he whimpered and blinked. "Anakin!"
"What?"
"What do you think you're doing?!"
"It is called 'laundry', Master."
"You know what I'm talking about."
"Hey! It's not my fault you're clumsy, Master." he now couldn't help it and burst into laughter as Obi-Wan lazily got to his feet.
"You took the shower, you should have taken care of water that left! This is how it works." he hissed and caressed his aching arse.
"I'm sorry, Master. It won't happen again." he was still chuckling. Obi-Wan tried to send him a warning look but eventually ended up with his own laughter.
"Are you going to pick up your clothes from your bedroom?"
"They aren't dirty, Master."
"But they are on the floor."
"You were a moment ago, too, and I had no complaint about it."
"It isn't funny, Anakin." he said but couldn't help his own smirk.
"Then why are you laughing?"
"Because... I don't know because I can, okay? Are you finished here? Pick up your cloaks and join me in the kitchen."
"Why should I pick them up? You made this mess."
"I wouldn't have if not for your stupid puddle."
"I was trying to warn you."
"Just do as I say." he told him firmly, trying to sound at least a bit dangerous. He wasn't very successful in it but he couldn't help it.
"Yes, Master." Anakin murmured, clearly unhappy. Then, he grinned. Obi-Wan knew this smirk. Obi-Wan knew this sparkle.
"No, Anakin, don't you try--"
But Anakin only laughed and used the Force to pick the clothes up, not even paying attention to Obi-Wan, who as always was lecturing about how the Force isn't about lifting things.
He ignored him and with one second, placed all the cloaks in the washing machine. He looked at Obi-Wan and smiled proudly.
The older Jedi only shook his head and sighed in disbelief, wondering where he made a mistake.
Anakin followed him to the kitchen, where dishes have already been taken care of. He didn't really understand why Obi-Wan required his assistance here.
Then, a broomstick has been given to him. His Master smiled when he glanced at him sadly.
"Don't make me do that..." he pleaded, almost begged. Obi-Wan wanted to laugh at his disappointed face expression.
"Don't worry, Anakin. I'm sure it would be good for you to recall how to use a broom, since in your room one cannot see the floor." he grinned and petted his cheek gently.
Anakin sighed and looked down.
"You enjoy torturing me, don't you?"
"You'll thank me later, young one." he chuckled and looked at shelves and a table. He should clean them up himself.
~~~o*o~~~
Until they finished the cleaning, the evening has come. Obi-Wan was delighted, seeing the state their apartment was in. Just like in the first days when they moved here.
He smiled and turned to Anakin, sitting silently on the couch. He wasn't able to make him clean his room, but at least the other parts of the apartment were enjoyable for now.
He settled down next to him.
"You did a good job today, Anakin." he smiled.
"Go away, I hate you." the Padawan murmured, hissing on the pain he felt in his muscles.
"You say this every time when we clean up."
"Because every time when we do this, I just hate you, Master."
They both chuckled and Obi-Wan patted Anakin's shoulder gently.
"Next time, we'll take care of this battlefield you call your bedroom."
"Leave my battlefield alone." he muttered and looked at the ceiling. Something made him pity this boy and he laughed.
"Fine. As long as I don't have to go there again, I can do that. For now."
They both smiled. After the whole day of cleaning up, Obi-Wan had to admit, he was quite tired. He couldn't imagine how exhausted his Padawan must have been.
He rested his head on the pillow and closed his eyes, hoping for some rest. Though, with Anakin, sleeping wasn't an option.
"Master..." he heard a quiet voice of his Padawan. Sighing, he decided that ignoring him wouldn't be the best. Not once he tried. It always makes the situation worse.
"Yes, Anakin?" he didn't bother to look at the blonde teenager.
"Should I give Master Windu's keys back?"
"Anakin!"
THE END