(A/N) OH STARCLAN BLESS MY SOUL FOR THIS… This is a freaking weird spoof shipping fanfic that you're about to read about a 10 year old (not really) dating a 14-year-old (not really) and also spoilers for Omen of the Stars (the first 3 books) and this takes place after book 3. This is a one-shot and a parody
~{SPOILERSSSSS YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED}~
"TIGERHEART!" Dankwi- I mean Dovewing shouted at the phone. Tigerfart- I mean Tigerheart had hung up. "AAAAHHH," Dovewing slammed the phone on a rock. She was furious that Tigerheart had been (sarcastically) dating Ivypoop- I mean Ivypool. As Dovewing was raging that Ivypool and Tigerheart are dating (IN FORTNITE-) Tigerheart appears out of a tree. Tigerheart boops Dovewing on the nose, "Mouse-brain I'm not dating your sister."
"AAHHHAAAA YOU ARE DATING MY SISTER!"
"Dovewing I'm not. I just told you I'm not."
Tigerheart was just playing around with Dovewing. "Ah Dovewing, Dovewing, Dovewing, DOVEWING," Tigerheart shoved his face into Dovewing's face a centimeter away. "Ahhh you always are so feisty." Dovewing shoved Tigerheart's face away with a paw, "Dude, personal space?"
"HECK NO LADY I LOVE YOU," Tigerheart licked her face. Dovewing looked down at the broken phone. Sometimes I wish I never met Tigerheart, Dovewing silently scooped up the phone in her paws.
(MEANWHILE WHERE IVYPOOL IS AT)
"WHY ISN'T SHE ANSWERING MY CALLS?!" Ivypool slammed her paw to the ground. She had been in Jayfeather's den because she apparently 'fell out of a tree and landed in a thorn bush'. "Well, Dovewing is probably busy," Jayfeather was making a poultice out of herbs (Marigold petals and Dock leaves I think). Ivypool just grumbled at the medicine cat, "yeah you're probably used to your boyfriend not picking up on his stick (HINT HINT)." Jayfeather glared at her, "HOW'D YOU KNOW ABOUT ROCK?"
"It's not like I see you talking to a stick."
(DOVEWING'S LOCATION THE NEXT DAY)
"Hey, Dovey~!" Tigerheart jumped out in a bush. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!" Dovewing jumped. "Oh, just wandered in Thunderclan territory," Tigerheart pranced around Dovewing. "What makes you think you could just walk in here?!" Dovewing landed a sheathed paw on his back. "Oh, just waiting for a little Dove~," Tigerheart purred in her ear. Dovewing flinched.
"Stop."
(In Jayfeather's den)
"WELL WHY'D YOU SPY ON ME?!" Jayfeather blindly lashed his tail in the air. "Cause I was on patrol," Ivypool scratched at the ground. Jayfeather grumbled and went back to sweeping the herb fragments out of the den. "Beats me, why you so grumpy?" Ivypool rolled around in her nest. Jayfeather snarled, "Why are you so ignorant?! Crashing into a thorn bush, yeah right you were probably going out with Hawkfrost."
"WHAT THE HE-," Ivypool glared at Jayfeather before Jayfeather rested his tail on her shoulder.
"Why is everybody yelling in here?" Briarlight dragged herself into the den. "I DON'T GO OUT WITH EVIL CATS!" Ivypool didn't seem to see Briarlight's shocked face. "Uh... listen Briarlight it's just a... defect of an herb I gave her," Jayfeather lied. "But it was just that Ivypool crashed down from a tree and into a thorn bush," Briarlight held his gaze.
"Fox crap."
(Dovewing's location)
Tigerheart pinned Dovewing onto the grass. "You know, I actually loved you," Tigerheart snarled as he gently placed his claws on Dovewing's whiskers. Dovewing flinched, "Leave."
"Not till I get a 'yes' from you, do you love me?"
Dovewing looked at Tigerheart with startled green/amber/blue eyes. "W-what?! You-" Dovewing started before Tigerheart held a paw on her nose.
"Boop. Nah I wouldn't harm you Dovey-bun," Tigerheart let her free.
"What. The. F-"