It's not like she forgets him.
As she's waking up in the morning, and her arm is slung over Spinner's bare chest, she can almost smell him. A mixture of oil and soap, a smell that twists in her chest and makes a half-smile curl at the end of her lips. The smell is home. She's eighteen again and curled up with him on her couch while they watch the news. It's a move that reminds her so much of her mom and Snake that she smiles up at him, and like always, he reads her mind and presses his lips to hers with a promise that this is forever.
It's not forever. The man laying next to her is her husband and he's not Sean. He smells differently. Like cologne and Above The Dot. He's the manager which means he sits in the apartment all day, and tells Peter what to do. She remembers when he'd sit with Sean and they'd laugh at "Pretty Boy Peter", and Emma would roll her eyes but laugh along with them, because a big part of her still stung over the fact that Peter planted drugs in Sean's locker.
Now Peter is one of Spinner's best friends. Now Emma can look him in the eyes and smile, remembering how he was at their wedding. Now Sean is halfway across the country and not next to Spinner on his couch.
"Morning baby," he murmurs and Emma smiles, not answering before she plants a gentle kiss to his lips. She rolls over and sits up, clutching the white sheets to her chest as she stares at her reflection in the mirror. Her blonde hair lies in rumpled waves, and there's a bit of eyeliner left over from last night smudged on her cheek. She doesn't tell Spinner but sometimes she wakes up in the middle of the night and runs to the bathroom, sitting down on the floor and shaking because she can't remember Sean's favorite color for a second.
She doesn't understand how someone can be a part of your life for so long, and then the next minute you're standing across a boy who used to bully you and your friend, swearing to love him till death do you part. He's not the same bully he once was - but he's also not the boy who signed your petition to get tampon dispensers in the girl's washroom. He's not the same mess he once was - but he's also not the boy who stood in front of a gun for you, ready to take the bullet that was always meant for you, and nobody else. He's a different man now, and he's a good man, but he's not the man who so sweetly took your innocence and held it to his heart, squeezing your fingers as the world stopped.
She wonders why everyone was so quick to accept this new chapter in her life. Why Manny went along with it, sang their wedding song, when she was the one who told Emma to follow her heart with Sean. Why Jay is slapping them on the back as he tips as a celebatory champagne glass towards them when Sean is his best friend. Why her parents are smiling as they give her away, when they currently hold a box from Sean to give to Emma if something happens. She wonders what's in that box - she wonders if now, she'll ever know when something happens. She no longer has that right.
So as she's getting ready for her day and Spinner comes up behind her, wraps his toned arms around her slim waist, she sees a curly-haired, blue-eyed, Sean Cameron smiling back at her. And she smiles back.
It's not like she forgets him.