I tried to imagine sometimes. That I was somewhere else, that is. Maybe I could start over. Maybe I could forget.
"We are gathered here today to celebrate the life of son and friend, Ulric Stern," the preacher called out into the audience. I'd like to call it a "captive" audience, but everyone seemed to be doing the same thing I was. Wishing they were somewhere else.
Ulric. I remembered it clearly. The phone calls. Yumi not showing up for school. It all came in flashes. The wreck.
I turned my blurred gaze to Yumi. Much more of a shell than the old Yumi these days. I wanted to tell her it would be alright... but I really wasn't sure.
I twisted my hair around my finger, attempting to take my mind of things. I closed my eyes, discouraging my tear ducts from joining the others in there weeping. To tell you the truth, I really didn't feel like I should. He was my friend, but maybe he wasn't. Maybe I wasn't.
With Yumi's sobs raising higher than the rest, I turned my gaze to Odd. Where had Odd gone? I twisted my head around glancing from time to time at his empty seat.
"...Peace be with you as it is with Ulric," The preacher closed, standing down. Masses of black flashed by me, as I turned to find my ride.
"Odd?" I called softly. I followed the crowd, afraid to get left in an awkward position with Yumi still sobbing in her folding chair.
It was a cool fall day. Cooler than usual. The bedded leaves splashed around my feet as I quickly paced out of the park.. And there was Odd. In the parking lot.
"Odd?" I called to him, catching one of his rare, foggy glances. I caught up to wear he was against his car and stopped. Neither of us said anything for a very long time. "Where...did you go..."
Silence.
"I guess...here," he finally answered. "I guess...I wanted to be somewhere else."
"Me too," I said.
"I wanna go back to sleep," Odd said sighing.
"Sleeping just means waking up," I said.
"So it's not worth it?" Odd asked curiously, inching closer.
"Depends."
"On what?"
"The dreams you have," I said, trying to make out his confused smile.
"When?"
"When you sleep."
"Does that make it worth it?" he asked, almost laughing now, taking my hand.
"Do you think it does?" I asked, staring him straight in the eyes.
"I do." he said, nose-nose with me now.
"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TWO!" Yumi said, storming right in on the wrong moment. I immediately backed up. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
"Yumi-" Odd started to try to explain. We had both figured out by now that this was not the day to do this to Yumi.
"NO! I DON'T CARE! ULRIC IS DEAD AND ALL YOU CAN THINK ABOUT IS GETTING CLOSER TO SISSY! MAYBE FROM SISSY...BUT FROM YOU?" She screamed, tears streaming down her face.
"Yumi, wait-" Odd tried to justify his case again, but Yumi ran away.
"I better go," I said, getting up.
"No- Sissy wait... we're all a little messed up right now," odd tried to explain. "Yumi's afraid."
"No, I understand. I have to go." This was awkward.
"Sissy," he called after me.
"Are you afraid? Are you afraid Odd?" I, asked turning around.
He took my hand and gently kissed me on the cheek.
"No," he said, smiling a little.