Title: Requiem for Romance
Rating: K, K+—it's all sunshine and happiness after awhile.
Summary: Who cares when we get married? All that matters is we plan to. And that idea means more than anything else in the world to me. Rogan.
A/N: A quick one-shot that came to mind while listening to 'Tattoo' by Jordin Sparks. To give you a slight timeline of events, this is set the day before Rory leaves for the campaign trail. Everything else has happened though. Hope you enjoy!!
Disclaimer: I do not own Gilmore Girls.
She watched the chauffeur open the door for him, and her heart lurched. She couldn't begin to describe what she was feeling. She knew this was going to happen. She knew that she didn't deserve any sort of chance to ask him to stay. She'd turned down his proposal because she needed to explore the doors that were open to her.
What she didn't tell him was she wanted him in her life while she explored these open doors. She needed him to hold her hand while she made her mistakes. She needed him to call her at three in the morning to tell her it was okay that she tripped and fell while on her way to meet with presidential hopeful Barack Obama (and she prayed dearly that wouldn't happen).
She really wasn't sure what led her here today. Her grandmother had told her that Logan was heading back to London. Apparently he'd made the decision after his proposal to the youngest Gilmore girl had been rejected. Rory had always had a feeling that he would go back. He loved London, and he loved being in the newspaper world (even though he would never openly admit it).
Rory sighed as she got out of the car, bracing herself. She knew he wouldn't exactly be jumping for joy at seeing her. But she needed to see him. To tell him she was sorry, and that she loved him with everything in her. She wasn't exactly sure where she would go after that declaration, but she hoped that somehow he would be able to fill in the blanks where she wasn't sure.
Swiftly shoving her hands in her pockets, she made her way over to where he was standing. He looked up at hearing her heels click on the pavement. His smile quickly faded and for one solitary moment she wanted to turn around and run away. But she couldn't do that to him again. He didn't deserve that. He motioned to the people around him—his grandfather, father, mother, sister and brother-in-law—to leave. The group made their way inside the Huntzberger mansion, casting not-so-subtle glances behind them, hoping to see the drama unfold.
"What are you doing here, Rory?" he asked her as soon as everyone had left.
"I heard you were leaving," she responded softly. So softly she wasn't even sure she had said it.
"Looks like the gossip mill was right this time," he stated coldly.
Rory willed herself not to cry at his tone. She knew she deserved no kindness from him. She knew before she had even gotten here that he would probably not be nice to her. He had no reason to be nice to her.
"Why are you leaving?" she asked him, finally looking at him.
"Because," he responded, not meeting her gaze. "Because there's nothing here for me now. Everything that was keeping me here is gone. London is where I belong now."
She nodded, taking a deep breath. The silence was deafening. But she needed to get it all out in the open. She needed to…
"Why are you here, Rory?" he asked again. His voice had grown louder, and she hoped he wasn't angry.
"I heard you were—"
"No," he cut her off. "What are you doing here, Rory. You could have just as easily called to confirm that I was leaving. So again I ask, what are you doing here, Rory?"
She sighed, and brought her hands out of her pockets to take hold of his hands. It seemed for a second like he would pull away, but when he didn't, she breathed a deep sigh of relief. The silence yet again overtook them, but it was a comfortable silence, and Rory knew that now was her chance.
"Do you remember when we jumped off the scaffold at the LDB event?" She looked at him expectantly, and at his nod, she continued. "I think that was when I first realized that I was in love with you."
He smiled slightly, still looking at her expectantly. She was still puzzled at how well he knew her. How well he knew that she still had so much more to say.
She squeezed her eyes shut, willing herself to not cower now. Not when she had his attention. "There was never anyone else for me after that, Logan. Sure, I was with Dean, but I knew it wasn't going anywhere. And after that event, I found myself being drawn to you. And the night we kissed at my grandparents' vow renewal, somehow I knew I'd found the one."
She paused, letting the information sink in for him. She wanted to make sure she didn't scare him off with this confession. She wanted to make sure that he knew she regretted saying no to his proposal. "And when you told me you loved me after our break, I just knew that was it. There was no one else that would ever make me happy—not Dean, not Marty, not Jess—it was just you, Logan."
He sighed. "Rory, I—"
She held a hand up to silence him. "No. You can't say anything. Because if you do I'll never get this out and you'll go to London and you'll never know how much it kills me to not have you in my life. Logan, I want to marry you. Someday. Not right now, though. Not when I have all these amazing things happening in my life. I leave tomorrow morning for the Barack Obama campaign trail. Obama! And when I got the job, the only person I wanted to tell was you. But I can't go on the campaign trail and be married to you at the same time."
"Then why couldn't you just say yes and make it a prolonged engagement, Rory? Why rip my heart out by telling me I'd be a hindrance to you if we were engaged? You have no idea how much it killed me to hear you say that to me," he told her, his voice not carrying anger, but sadness.
"I…" she found herself at a loss for words. "I don't know."
"Rory," he began, releasing one of his hands from her grasp, and bringing it to her face, cupping her cheek in his hand. "I love you with every fiber of my being. I want you in my life. I want to be the one to call you when you mess up on national TV and tell you that it's going to be okay. But I don't want to go back. I want to move forward. Who cares when we get married? All that matters is we plan to. And that idea means more than anything else in the world to me."
"I…" she stopped, searching for the right words to say. She knew his family was watching them. She knew he was waiting for her to say something brilliant, and promising. But she didn't know what to say.
"I love you, Rory," he said, as if sensing her discomfort. "And in truth, that is really all that matters to me."
She smiled, bring her free hand to rest on his, which was still cupping her cheek. She closed her eyes, composing herself. She opened her eyes, and met his chocolate brown ones. And in that instant, she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that nothing would keep her from him.
"So does this mean you're not going to London?" she asked, knowing he would get what she was saying when she asked the question.
He looked at her, studying her. "Are you…" he took a deep breath. "Are you saying yes?"
She nodded. "Yes, I am."
Logan smiled at her and kissed her deeply, wrapping his arms tightly around her waist. Rory lost herself in the kiss, loving the way she was feeling at that moment. The kiss ended slowly, but Logan kept his tight embrace. Rory smiled at him. Logan kissed her quickly. "Looks like I'll be staying here in the states."
Bringing the velvet box out of the inside pocket of his coat, Logan smiled at Rory. "I guess I should be giving this back."
She bit her lip, trying to contain the giddy smile that was attempting to break across her face. "Seems that way."
Logan took the ring out of the box and took Rory's left hand into his. "I love you, Ace."
Rory breathed deeply, loving the way he said her nickname. "It's so good to hear that again."
She studied the ring as he still held tightly to her left hand. She looked up at him and smiled. "What do you say we get your bags out of the car. Maybe if you're lucky, I'll let you drive me to the bus stop in the morning."
"Your mom won't mind?" Logan asked as he grabbed a small duffel from the car and handed it to Rory.
Rory took the bag and slung it over her shoulder, shutting the door for Logan after he'd taken out his other two suitcases. "No, I think she won't mind sharing the good-bye duties tomorrow morning with her daughter's fiancé."
Logan smiled at Rory again as he opened the door to his house. "Mom! Dad! Gramps! Honor! Josh! Get down here, Rory and I have something to tell you."