Spencer Reid wasn't one to make spontaneous decisions or just do things. He always had to plan everything and think it through.
When he made the decision to resign from the BAU, he thought about it for several days. The BAU was everything for him and he never did anything else. Sure, with his IQ he can do just about anything he wants to and the job offers clearly aren't lacking but the BAU was his second home.
He thought about everything. As soon as he'll give his superior his resignation, he will be jobless. He didn't want to leave the BAU. He loved his job even though it was horrible from time to time, he still loved his job and the fact didn't change.
The only thing that is going to change is his relationship status. He should have known from the beginning on that it would turn out like this sooner or later. He just wasn't what people looked for in a partner. He wasn't someone you would want to spend the rest of your life with.
When his relationship first started, he knew all of this and talked about it with his soon to be ex boyfriend. He explained everything and made it clear that he wasn't like other people and that it wasn't because of his IQ. His IQ played a big part when it came to his personality but his IQ didn't make him who he is.
The people he met throughout his whole life until now made him how he is. The never ending bullying, growing up without anyone to talk to and the adult role he was forced into at ten years made him how he is.
That's exactly what he told his partner and he got reassured over and over again that it didn't matter and that he was loved.
For a long time he believed it until one week ago when he realized that it was all just a game to Morgan. Seeing his boyfriend have sex with another person was painful especially when he truly believed that Derek was in fact gay.
But which gay man had sex with a woman?
As it turned out, Morgan wasn't as gay as he said but Reid fell for it. He fell for the illusion of a gay Derek Morgan.
He thought for years that he was loved by his boyfriend and that they would spend the rest of their lives together. He believed that they would grow old together and sit at the other's death-bed.
So, when he walked into Garcia's lair a week ago to give her a file, the last thing he expected was to see his boyfriend of five years between her legs, licking her pussy.
Thinking about it now, it shouldn't have surprised him as much as it did. He should have thought about it at the beginning. They were to close to be just best friends and the sexual tension between them could have been cut with a knife.
Maybe they were meant for each other all along but why was he in a relationship with Derek then? If they weren't meant to be, why had the universe to be so cruel to him again and make him believe that Derek Morgan was in love with him?
He received emotional blow after blow and he was used to pain. But the pain he felt when he caught his boyfriend cheating on him was something, he never felt before.
The pain was definitely there but his strongest emotions were disgust and betrayal.
He couldn't understand how they were both able to act normal around him. They acted like nothing happened and Garcia had the nerve to comfort him while she slept with his boyfriend behind his back for god knows how long.
They both betrayed him by sleeping with each other and he couldn't help the need to vomit that came up every time he saw one of them and especially when he saw both of them together.
All of that played a big part in the decision he made. He is going to resign from the BAU and nothing is going to stop him. He tried to work with both of them for a week in which they luckily didn't have a case but he for himself realized that he can't keep it on a professional level. The risk that he would snap while they were out in the field is to high for him. He's not going to take the risk of letting someone on his team get hurt or even killed because of him.
With these thoughts in his head, he picked up his resignation letter from his desk and went to his superior's office with his badge and gun on him.
He knocked and waited for the "come in" before he want inside. He closed the door behind him and then just laid his resignation in front of his unit chief.
"What's that?" Hotch asked when Reid laid down the piece of paper down.
"My resignation, sir." He answered with a steady voice and laid his credentials and gun beside his resignation.
Hotch looked at him and the resignation for several times, not willing to believe that the moment came. His expression changed every time he looked up at Reid until he finally settled on a shocked and confused expression.
"Spencer?" Hotch asked unusually concerned.
"I thought about it for a week now and worked with everyone for a week now but I can not be a part of this team any longer. I can't keep it professional." He offered as and explanation which didn't help his superior at all.
"And why is that so, Spencer?"
"I'm sorry for my choice of words, sir, but I can not work on a team with my soon to be ex boyfriend who thought it was a good idea to fuck his best friend, who is a woman behind my back and act like nothing happened. It is disgusting to be kissed by lips which licked a pussy ten minutes beforehand. I can not continue to work on a team when I can't trust every member of said team. I'm truly sorry, sir."
"Now is not the time to call me sir, Spencer."
"I'm sorry."
"And stop apologizing. You did nothing wrong. So, Morgan cheated on you with Garcia?" Hotch asked with a tone of anger in his voice.
"Yes. I don't know how many times it happened but last week I walked into her office to find him kneeling between her legs and licking her pussy. I really tried to work with both of them but I can't."
"That's understandable, son. Are you sure that this is what you want? You could transfer to another team. You don't have to leave the FBI because of them." Hotch almost begged and who could blame him for it? He didn't want to lose the best member of his team. Since Reid was brought into the BAU by Gideon, they solved the cases faster and everything was easier. If they wanted to know something, they didn't have to look it up, they were able to ask Reid and he knew the answer every time.
Generally Reid leaving the BAU wasn't fair. He didn't do anything wrong. His boyfriend and best friend decided to sleep together behind his back and it wasn't his fault but he paid the price for it.
"The risk that I'm going to see them is to high for me. I'm truly sorry, Aaron. I don't want to leave you, JJ, Emily and David but I can't come into work everyday and act like nothing never happened. I can't be professional anymore and before something happens in the field, I'm leaving."
"It's not fair that you have to pay for it."
"Life's never fair, Aaron."
"I know. It's just hard to see you go. You worked so hard to get into the BAU and proved yourself over and over again and now you're leaving because of their stupidity."
"It's hard for me to go too but this is the best for everyone. I promise to stay in contact with you and the rest, no matter where I am but I can't stay here."
"It's alright, I understand why you can't. Do you want to tell the team or should I do it?"
"I'll tell them. I still have to break up with Morgan officially." Reid replied and Hotch nodded, getting up and going into the conference room with him. On their way he sent JJ a message which told her to get everyone into the conference room.
Hotch and Reid stood behind the table when the whole team came in a moment later, looking confused.
"Do we have a case?" JJ asked and Hotch shook his head, looking at Reid.
"I'm leaving the FBI." Reid said and immediately the protests started.
"What?" Garcia screeched while JJ looked hurt and went closer to him. Derek probably looked the most hurt out of everyone in the room and Rossi and Prentiss looked they knew it was coming.
"Are you sure, Spence?" JJ asked quietly when she stood in front of him. Her eyes showed that she wanted to talk him out of leaving but as soon as she looked into his eyes, she knew that it wouldn't do anything.
"I'm sure, Jen. I'm truly sorry about leaving most of you but I can't be professional anymore."
"Baby?" Morgan hesitantly asked and while Hotch suppressed a growl, Reid started laughing.
"Don't call me that, asshole." Reid got out between laughter and immediately almost everyone turned to glare at a confused looking Morgan.
"What did I do?"
"Cunnilingus."
"You cheated on him?" JJ screamed angrily, trying to attack him but Hotch held her back before she was able to connect her fist with his face.
Morgan looked guiltily at him and even Garcia had the courtesy to look guilty and ashamed.
"How long?" Reid asked when he stopped laughing.
"It was only one time."
"Bullshit, Derek. Bullshit. I know how pussy tastes and if you're stupid enough to kiss me shortly after you performed oral sex on her, I'm sorry but that's your fault then."
"Seven months." He said quietly and ignored the angry expressions he got from his team.
Reid looked hurt for a moment before he shook his head at him. It didn't even surprise him.
"Alright, I truly hope that you're going to be happy with her. Maybe she's able to give you what I couldn't in five years." Spencer said and ignored the hurt and guilty expression Morgan had.
"I'm sorry about leaving all of you. But like I promised Aaron, I promise to stay in contact with most of you." Spencer told them and hugged Hotch who immediately hugged him back.
"You'll always have a place here in case you decide to come back and if you ever need something, don't hesitate to call." The Unit Chief whispered in his ear and he nodded his head against the solid chest.
"I promise to call if I need help." He said and untightened the hug between them and took JJ in his arms.
"Call me as much as possible, Spence. And if you need someone, my door is always open." She said and he nodded, smiling.
"I know, Jen. We'll still have brunch on Sunday?"
"Of course. Henry misses his uncle Spencer."
"I miss him too." He said and went to hug Emily.
"Clyde is looking for someone." She told him and he grinned against her shoulder.
"Tell him to call me." He said, still grinning and Prentiss grinned right back after they untightened the hug. To everyone else it might have looked stupid but their eyes said everything they needed and they were always able to communicate without words.
He started to walk towards Rossi and immediately got embraced by him. He hugged right back and leaned into the hug.
"If you need something, you'll call me. Understood?"
"Understood."
"Take care of yourself then, son." David said and Reid nodded.
"I truly hope you two are going to be happy." Reid said towards Garcia and Morgan who looked more ashamed then anything. The whole team turned to glare at them while Reid left the conference room.
He picked up his bag at his desk which he already cleared this morning and walked through the glass doors of the BAU for the last time.
He didn't hear the accusations that were thrown around in the conference room when he walked into the elevator.
That's it. That's the end of everything he had until now.
One last look through the hall and the elevator doors closed.
This was officially the beginning of a new chapter of his life.
Time to open up a new chapter in life, and to explore a larger centre.
-Lillian Russell