Dome of Doom.
Writer: Invader Johnny.
Plot: A deleted Scene from The Nightmare Begins, before Zim is given his secret mission, he must prove himself worthy of a planet and what better way than to fight a gargantuan monster?
Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim, it belongs to Jhonen Vasquez, I'm just a fan of the show.
Author's Note: As we all know, originally there was going to be a "fight to the death" between Zim and the Digestor in "The Nightmare Begins" unfortunately it was cut for time so I decided to write my own version of how the battle would have gone for our favorite Invader.
"You will be assigned to Blorch, home of the slaughtering rat people. Thank you." Tallest Red said uncaringly as a picture of Invader Skoodge being attacked by the rat people appears on the holoscreen.
Zim saw the depiction of Skoodge's fate done by a conceptual artist from afar, chuckling evilly "Serve's him right for being so short and ugly… Wait… That underserving little glory hog still has a mission! What am I doing standing around?! ZIM IS MORE DESERVING!"
"Get out of the way!" He screams, finally remembering why he stole a ride to Conventia in the first place "Move it!"
"Hey you Jerk!" A random Irken snapped hopping around in discomfort holding his appendage "That's my foot you stepped on!"
Zim didn't hear the guy, instead he kept pushing his way to the front of the main convention hall through the crowds of Irkens, all the while he kept hurting anyone who was in front of him, the complains seemed to keep getting more frequent as the desperation to reach the Tallest was all that Zim cared about.
"Move! You're in my way! Get out of the way! Get out of the way! Move it! Move it!"
"Thus, concludes the great assigning!" Tallest Red said proudly "Help yourselves to some nachos, and we'll see you at the equipping station."
"Yes, gorge yourselves..." Tallest Purple said as an afterthought "You MOOCHES!"
"No, no, no! Wait!"
Zim waves an arm from the front of the crowd, he finally reached his destination, he was pleased but the same couldn't be said for everyone else.
"That voice!"
Zim crawls onto the pod, which only made the Tallest worst fears come true.
"It can't be!"
The Irken rears his head up, revealing his identity to all.
"ZIM!" Both Tallest say in dismay.
"Uh-oh" Skoodge thought, he sure didn't want to get in the crossfire and slowly backed away from Zim.
"Sorry I'm late, my Tallest." Zim said out of breath "I couldn't find my invitation. You're lucky I made it at all."
"You weren't invited at all!" Red said, his eye twitching uncontrollably.
"Really?" Zim asked innocently "Because according to the broadcast "Any and all Irkens can be at the Great Assigning, no questions asked."
"Yes." Purple surprisingly agreed "But Irkens that weren't exiled are invited! How did you get here?! Weren't you banished to Foodcourtia? Shouldn't you be… You know, frying… Something?"
"AH! QUESTIONS!" Zim bellowed dramatically "The broadcast lied to me!"
"ZIM!" Red snapped "Pay attention!"
"Oh, right." He composed himself "I quit when I found out about this."
"You quit being banished?" Purple was aghast "You can't just quit!"
"Seems to me, I just did my Tallest." Zim replied obliviously. "And I'm ready to take my assignment for Operation Impending Doom II."
"Yes, and why is this our second attempt at universal conquest, Zim?" Red questioned with suppressed rage. "Care to tell us that?"
"Because our first attempt failed." Zim replied "And I dunno why, quite the mystery."
"Quite the…?" Purple chocked on his own rage "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! You can't think of one reason?!"
Zim began to ponder, rubbing his chin.
Flashback to Irk.
Sirens are going off, and several explosions occur. Two Irkens run towards a parked Spittle Runner, but abruptly turn around and run away from the ship right before a large robotic foot of Frontline Battle Mech #4 crushes it.
In the cockpit of the battle mech, Zim pulls levers while laughing maniacally.
"But sir, we're still on our own planet!" An Operator said in desperation.
"Silence! " Zim ordered "Twist those knobs! Twist those knobs!" He then pointed to a random operator "You! Pull some levers! Pull some levers!"
Zim's status as an Invade meant they couldn't disobey, but they sure didn't enjoy helping in the destruction of their home planet.
"I hope I don't get deactivated for this." Some Irkens though in dismay.
Meanwhile the Almighty Tallest watch speechlessly from a building as the battle mech rampages through the wrecked the capital city with Zim's maniacal laughter ringing in the air.
"Didn't we tell Zim to stay in the circle?" Purple asked.
"Obviously the idiot didn't hear us!" Red snapped, his eyes widened exasperatedly seconds later "What is he doing now?!"
The Battle Mech began to break dance while shooting lasers out of all possible available lasers, which were a lot.
Needless to say that caused even more devastation to the city; some even hit the Invader Academy.
Several Irkens screamed in terror as debris felled, squashing them like bugs.
All the while Zim kept laughing "YES! MORE! MORE! NO ONE WILL ESCAPE THE EVIL ZIM HANDS OF ZIM WUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
Once the flashback ended, Zim kept rubbing his chin.
"Well?" Purple asked annoyed.
"Nope, sorry my Tallest, still a mystery to me." Zim shrugged, he of course didn't notice his leaders' glares of doom. "But at the very least I put the fires out."
"You made them worse!" Red hissed.
"Worse... or better?"
Purple groaned in disgust "Besides, no Invader has ever been so... Very small."
For the very first time, Zim looked worried it seemed as if he wouldn't be getting a planet to destroy, he wouldn't be a part of the Invasion, and he couldn't accept that.
"You're very small, Zim. You're a tiny... thing."
"But... My Tallest, with all due respect, Invader's blood marches through my veins like giant RADIOACTIVE ROBO-PANTS! The pants command me! … DO NOT IGNORE MY VEINS!
The Tallest stared down at him awkwardly.
"As a show of... gratitude for your service in the past... eh... Here's a sandwich." Red pulls a sandwich out of his belt and hands it to Zim.
"But…"
"Thanks for coming, everybody! " Purple boomed.
"NO!"
"Goodnight! "
"NO! NO! WAIT! " He bellowed louder than his leaders, desperate for an assignment, any assignment .
"What?" Purple questioned annoyed "You got your sandwich! "
"My Tallest, an opportunity to prove I truly can be an Invader is all that I ask! Gimme!"
Purple was irritated and his face showed it, he was ready to yell at Zim to go away so Operation Impending Doom II could begin, only to get stopped by his co-ruler who levitated between him and the little pest.
Purple assumed the best for them and the worst for Zim, only to get caught off guard by what Red said next.
"We see now that you are truly deserving."
"HE IS?!" Purple snapped in disbelief.
"HE IS?!" The crowd followed suit.
"I am?" Zim asked surprised "I mean, of course I am! I AM ZIM!"
Everyone was aghast, thinking that Red had somehow gotten the brain worms or worse somehow was becoming a defective right in front of their eyes.
"Zim, you can still get your wish and prove to us, to the Empire that you are Invader material." Red said "If you can pass one simple challenge."
"A challenge my Tallest?" Zim asked puzzled "What kind of a challenge?"
"One that requires cunning, bravery and perseverance" Red snickered "All the qualities of a true Invader, if you pass that, then you'll have the honor of being a part of Operation Impending Doom II and get your own planet to destroy."
"Very well my Tallest!" Zim saluted respectfully "To prove myself, I will allow the evaluation of my INCREDIBLE self! No challenge is too great for Invader Zim!"
"We'll see about that." Red thought with a cruel smirk.
Which Purple noticed "Ohhhhh!"
"You will have the honor of going to battle and should you survive… Then you get your mission."
"Neat!" Zim said happily only for his face to turn confused "Wait… What?"
Red made a gesture to the ceiling, which split in two and a huge teleporter appeared, it was sleek in design, not to mention quite terrifying.
"Good Luck Invader Zim!" Purple said loud and insincere.
The teleporter zapped Zim which made him scream in agony and in a flash of light he disappeared, the only thing left was a circle of what could be ashes.
"I don't remember teleporters appearing to be so painful looking." Purple mused, looking at the machine skeptically, he also smelled some remnants of what he assumed was some of Zim's flesh.
"They aren't." Red confirmed "I just made a special modification for Zim."
"I LIKE IT!"
"I know, I did too." The crimson eye Tallest said before turning to his subjects dramatically "Everyone! We are about to witness the end of the Irken Empire's curse! TO… THE…. DOME…. OF…. DOOM!"
The crowd went wild.
"Eh?" Zim opened his eyes, he was covered in darkness "Where am I?... Why is it so dark? Is this my challenge? To be in this little room without any light? What a rip off! Hardly worthy of my amazing abilities!"
Suddenly, the ceiling opened up and light entered the room, Zim puts a hand over his eyes to avoid get blinded, the floor began to move, rising up.
Once Zim reached the top, he noticed that he was wearing his Irken Battle Armor, that was nothing compared to the crowd of Irkens that seemed to be cheering.
"Hey, that's neat!" Zim said smugly "They are all here to witness my amazing victory!"
Meanwhile the Tallest were seeing everything from their own luxury suite, Purple was shoveling in doughnut after doughnut, making a lot of noise which annoyed his co-ruler, this annoyed Red, so he quickly got up from his throne, levitating over to the window, looking down at Zim with contempt.
"Soon he'll be out of our lives…. Forever."
A huge Monitor hovers above the Stadium, it turns on, displaying the the Conventia Announcer. "Welcome, brave Irken soldiers, welcome to the Dome of Doom!"
The crowd went wild.
"Tonight, we have a special treat for you all!" The Announcer boomed "Invader Zim will fight for his life!"
"Eh?" Zim said confused "YOU GOT THAT WRONG YOU STINKING ANNOUNCER BEAST! I'M HERE TO PROVE THAT I'M INVADER MATERIAL!"
The floating screen crashed into Zim.
"Oops." The Announcer said sarcastically "My bad, faulty equipment."
The screen levitated, showing a pretty banged up Zim, he wearily gets up coughing some screen glass.
"I hate you announcer guy."
Once more the screen dropped on him, his bots the only thing visible.
"Ah! The glass!"
"Enough of this!" Red snapped "Bring out the DIGESTOR!"
"Hey! Why did you do that?!" Purple complained "It was a great show!"
"Be quiet!" Red hissed "The sooner Zim is dead, the better!"
The screen once more got off Zim's body, unsurprisingly he coughs up more screen glass.
"This taste horrible!" He complained "I'm going to need something to get that flavor out of my mouth!"
While he was dusting himself, a huge gate door opened behind him, in the darkness two ominous red eyes were seen, a soft low grow was heard afterwards, Zim of course was oblivious.
A huge paw came into the light, the another and another, finally revealing the imposing creature that was the Digestor.
It was menacing, it was feral, it was ugly, but he also had the thirst for blood, once his eyes set on the oblivious Irken, his mind was set for his next meal, the Digestor hadn't been feed since he last kill two weeks ago, so the sight of an unsuspecting prey made him salivate.
The crowd began to chant "KILL! KILL! KILL!"
And still, Zim was none the wiser, all he had on his mind was to get the horrible flavor out of his mouth, painfully getting the glass out of his tongue.
"Ugh.. This taste worse than crispy Vort Dogs!" He complained.
The Digestor was inches from Zim, snickering not so softly, the shadow looming over the would be Invader.
"Eh?" He said confused "Did my amazing shadow get bigger? Does it mean I grown taller?!"
The Digestor lifted his paw, ready to squish Zim.
The Tallest and the rest of the soldiers were at the edge of their seats, eagerly awaiting the strike that would eliminate their thorn on their side.
Zim continued to boast about his "amazing new height."
"I knew I was meant to be Tallest!" He gloated "This is a cause for celebration!" He got a sandwich out of his pocket "And what better than to have a sandwich!"
The Digestor's paw stopped inches away from Zim's head, much to the chagrin of everyone witnessing the battle.
The monster salivated, making smacking noises with his mouth, he grabbed the sandwich from Zim's tiny hands and skipped away like a happy child, humming s little tune as he ate the sandwich, returning back into his cell, which closed promptly.
Zim stared at his empty hands "Huh? What happened to my sandwich? And my is my shadow so small, Curses! I was lied to!" He then turned around seeing the Digestor behind bars, happily eating what little remained of his beloved snack.
"HEY YOU!" He bellowed "YOU sandwich snatcher! Gimme back my sandwich!"
Zim then ran towards the cell hoping to get it back (although by this point, why bother?) he only got electrocuted by the bars "I WILL NOT BE DEFEATED!"
He kept getting electrocuted "OW! OW! OW!"
Back in the luxury suite, The Tallest were aghast.
"He just defeated the Digestor!" Purple snapped incredulously, his left eye twitching. "The most feared beat in the galaxy with nothing but a sandwich!" He then turned to his co-ruler "This is all your fault!"
"MY FAULT?!" Red exploded "How is it my fault?!"
"Well DUH!" Purple mocked "Who gave Zim the sandwich? Oh yeah! YOU DID!"
"Shut it!" Red sneered "This is only a minor setback."
"A minor set… ARE YOU KIDDING?! You do realize we have to now give Zim an assignment, right?"
"Yes…" Red acknowledged, getting a holographic map of their known universe from his PAK, seeing where he could send Zim, the farther the better, he then noticed a little outline of a planet and a question mark in it with the word 'planet?' written underneath it.
"Maybe we can get rid of Zim yet."
Six Months Later:
"Invader Zim reporting, sirs. The mission goes well."
Red drops his soda and Purple stares with his mouth agape.
"But surely you expected that from me."
Red spits some of his drink "Zim... You're alive!?"
"Yes. So very alive., and full of goo. Mission goo!" Zim said dramatically "Don't be surprised if I take care of the humans before the armada even gets here! Well, I've much work to do, so: Invader Zim, signing off!"
GIR falls from his perch, knocking Zim down.
"Oh, my spine!"
The transmission goes into static. Red and Purple glance at each other in disbelief.
"Well?" Purple groaned angrily "Now what?"
Red started weeping.
"WHY WON'T HE DIE?!"
I think that ending this fic with Tallest Red being so close to having a mental breakdown was both funny and perfect, he just can't seen to get rid of Zim and sooner or later that's going to be his undoing.
Well, the fight between Zim and The Digestor was hardly "exciting" but then again, I pretty much written what supposedly was meant to happen in the deleted scene, I'm not exactly satisfied with it because I don't think that it was funny enough but at the same time I do think that Zim is oblivious enough to sense danger sometimes so this would probably be in character for him..
Obviously, I also changed some lines from the original episode to make it "fit" into the vision I had in mind.
Anyway, as always please do leave some constructive criticism.
Invader Johnny Signing Off.