A/N: So just a few things before you get started: Robin left with Marian to NYC and that whole fake Zelena thing never happened; she just went to jail and eventually Regina let her out to give her a chance at redemption. This takes place somewhere after 5x01, and technically Emma is still with Hook, so if infidelity isn't your thing, you might not be too pleased.

The title, and honestly the main idea of this fic came from the Jack off Jill song of the same name.

So, I can't close out this note without saying an extra special thank you to Domi, whom this fic is a gift for. Domi convinced me to finish this fic when I wanted to abandon it on my hard drive to never see the light of day, and I may be nearly a week late with this, but Happy 20th Birthday to one of my best friends!

With all that out of the way, enjoy!

They had failed. They had gone somewhere to try to save Emma, that was for sure. One minute they were standing in the middle of Main Street, getting swept up into a portal to go and save Emma; the next, they were in Granny's Diner. They came back wearing clothes from a different land, something like that of the Enchanted Forest, but… simpler somehow.

Where they went wasn't important though; what mattered was that they failed. The blonde was swaggering around town in black leather, with hair as white as her mother's namesake. And their memories were gone… again. Their memories of however long they were wherever they were was gone, like dust in the wind.

But what wasn't gone, was the memory of Emma, her Emma. Emma, who looked at Regina like she hung the moon when she thought no one was watching. Emma, who remembered Regina's little likes and dislikes, who brought her lunch between the chaos of the week, and who was the first to notice when Regina wasn't feeling quite like herself, sometimes even before she realized.

It happened unexpectedly. After a night of too much cider and whispered words; between finding their son in Neverland and dealing with her significantly-less-evil-now sister, Emma and Regina had fallen into something of a routine, if one could call it that.

Emma would come over at midnight something like twice a week, creeping in her window, and they fucked, plain and simple. Sometimes they would talk after, but most times, the blonde would leave again, disappearing into the night like a figment of Regina's imagination. When they saw each other in the daylight; not a whisper of their nighttime activities.

Regina clutched the dagger in her hand, the name Emma Swan staring back at her like a cruel joke as she got ready for bed, thinking of Emma, and how they failed her, how she failed her.

She had promised to fix this. She didn't quite remember saying those words, but she felt it, deep down, that she had promised to bring Emma's light back.

Her house felt empty, with Henry sleeping at his grandparent's house, and Emma prowling around Storybrooke surely causing some sort of mayhem, it was just her and her thoughts.

She was operating on autopilot. Check all the doors, feel for the dagger. Turn off the downstairs lights, feel for the dagger. Brush her teeth, wash her face, check her mirrors, feel for the dagger.

Regina was surprised, to say the least, that Emma hadn't ripped the dagger from her hands the second they returned from... wherever, but she didn't intend to betray the blonde's trust.

She lay in her bed, staring up at the ceiling for what felt like hours, but in reality was no more than a few minutes. She combed through the past weeks and months, trying to pinpoint the exact moment that led them to this. That led them to Emma sacrificing her soul for Regina's chance at a happy ending. Robin was gone, and Emma was the Dark One. What chance did she have now?

As Regina was finally drifting to sleep with the dagger firmly grasped in her hand under the pillow, she felt a dip in the bed, and cold fingers stroke her cheek. Immediately, her eyes snapped open and she almost jumped out of her skin.

"Did you think I forgot about our… appointment?" The woman drawled from the other side of the bed.

"Dark One," Regina regarded the woman in her bed as she trained her eyes up to meet the Dark One's cold, blue gaze.

"Oh, no need to be so cold Regina." Emma continued stroking her cheek. "I'm still Emma. I still have all her memories, I know what she feels... what you feel. Just because I have power, doesn't mean I'm not your Emma."

Regina sat up fully, abandoning the dagger under her pillow. "The Emma I know wouldn't do what you're doing. She wouldn't strip her friends and family of their memories in pursuit of some twisted game."

"But…" Emma got up from her seated position, and positioned herself in such a way that Regina was forced to lie back down. Emma crawled closer, until her hands were on either side of Regina's head, and she was hovering on top of her. "She would fuck you. Is that what you want, Regina?"

Regina's breath caught in her throat. The woman above her was Emma, she could see it in her eyes, behind the hardened 'Dark One' gaze. The soft, kind Emma who Regina knew in the daytime, the same Emma who disappeared every time she climbed into Regina's bed and fucked her into the next morning, she was there. She was buried deep, practically inaccessible, but she was there.

"I just want to... fix this. To make this better."

Emma tsked. "I don't need to be fixed, I'm better than I've ever been, in fact, I'm sublime. I'm free."

"But you're not free Emma. You're controlled by a dagger and there's voices in your head telling you to do things you'd otherwise never do. You're not...," Regina gestured vaguely at the woman in front of her, "like this."

"Shows what you know." Emma got closer still, until their breath was mingling in the space between them. "You say you don't, but you see me as this... this savior," she spat out the title like it was poison on her tongue. "You see me as some light when, you must know, an angel can't fuck you the way you need me to."

"I never said that." Regina was trying her damnedest to hold her ground, but her body was betraying her, her heart threatening to beat out of her chest. "I just know you, and this, this character you're playing, it's not you."

"And yet," Emma paused, running her tongue up the brunette's neck, eliciting an involuntary shudder from her, "you look at me like I'm still her. You can make me leave at any time, you have the dagger."

Regina desperately tried to steady her breath. "I'm not going to make you do anything."

Emma got right up to Regina's ear, her body flush against the brunette's, as she whispered, "but you haven't even asked."

Emma kissed her way down Regina's jaw, tenderly, more intimately than before she had become immortal. Before, she took Regina with fervor, but now, now she meandered her way down her neck as if she had all the time in the world.

"That means..." she continued kissing down her body, her fingers slowly undoing the buttons on Regina's pajama top as she spoke, "you're either so scared of me that you can't say a word, or you don't want me to go."

Blue eyes met brown as Regina let out another shaky breath. "I'm not afraid of you."

The blonde hummed as she returned to her ministrations, peppering hot, open-mouthed kisses along Regina's now exposed collarbone. "That's what I thought"

The blonde was swirling her tongue in the dip in Regina's collarbone that always made the woman shudder. She took the hand that wasn't holding her bodyweight and palmed slow circles over her already hardening nipple. Regina couldn't stop the small mewling sound that came from the back of her throat even if she wanted to. Regina's hands instinctively travelled to Emma's hair, and found themselves greeted with an intricate bun. Nimble fingers worked to disentangle her hair from all the clips and elastics, until Emma's white hair cascaded down over her shoulder. When Regina ran her fingers through it, it still felt the same, but yet it looked like all the life had been sucked out of her golden tresses.

The newfound intimacy that Emma was showing her was too much to handle, considering what their relationship was supposed to be, and Regina attempted to get back their old dynamic. She threaded her fingers in Emma's now loose hair, and pulled her back up her body, capturing her mouth in a searing kiss.

The blonde responded, but it was still tinged with this tenderness that threw Regina off balance. Instead of continuing to fight it, she sighed into Emma's mouth, consequences and future emotional turmoil be damned.

It appeared that Emma sensed the shift in Regina's demeanor, and with a final kiss, she resumed her previous position. Her fingers trailed idly down Regina's arms, sending shivers down her spine and straight to her core that was aching to be touched. Emma had teased her before, sure, but not at this slow-burning level that had all of her nerve endings on fire.

Regina knew from dealing with Dark Ones in the past that they were their most honest selves under the curse. If Regina stopped and thought about it too long, about the fact that this Dark One was being gentle and loving as opposed to brash and detatched, it would've left Regina with far too many questions that she wasn't yet ready to answer.

Emma moved downwards, tongue circling one nipple, fingers working deftly at the other, flicking and twisting until Regina was practically incoherent with want, moaning everytime Emma moved her tongue just so.

"Please," the plea came out strained.

"Please what?" Emma ceased her ministrations, looking up at Regina through her icy lashes.

"Touch me."

"Aren't I already doing that?"

Regina growled and threw her head back into the pillow. "You know what I mean."

"Oh." Emma shifted her leg until it was between Regina's, and pressed her thigh against the brunette's core, eliciting a strangled sort of whine from her. "You want me to touch you here."

Regina's hips jerked upwards instinctively, grinding on Emma's leg in search of more contact. Emma had hardly touched her, yet her chest was already heaving with pleasure, her cheeks tinged pink. She couldn't articulate her desire with more than a lengthy groan.

"Oh look at you," Emma whispered. She stroked her palms along Regina's thighs, spreading her legs further. "You couldn't pretend to not be mine if you tried."

"Shut up," she bit out.

The blonde, taking pity on her, took two fingers to the woman's drenched folds, and entered her slowly, moving agonizingly slow, still intent on teasing her until she was driven insane. Regina's mind was racing. The hardened woman with the softened demeanor was an oxymoron that was making her head spin. She'd known a Dark One for most her adult life and... he was never gentle. He was someone who just took. Took her innocence, took her youth, took her light. He was harsh and selfish, but Emma, she was giving. Emma as the Dark One was an enigma she struggled to wrap her head around.

She struggled even moreso that her mind was not her own right now, head spinning as Emma was rubbing her clit with slow circles, her mouth dancing across her nipple in sinful ways. Emma released her with a pop, yet the sensation continued, and it was only through her arousal induced haze that Regina registered that Emma was playing with magic, dark, sexual magic that the Savior wouldn't have dared dabble in.

She shouldn't be enjoying this. She knew she shouldn't be enjoying Emma's darkness like this, but when deft fingers finally found their destination, the moan that came from her, betraying her body's desires, said otherwise.

The blonde ran her cold fingers down Regina's sides, scraping her nails down Regina's exposed skin, only eliciting the slightest amount of pain, a whisper of the games they used to play.

Emma's head dropped between Regina's thighs, and her tongue began ghosting across slick folds, causing more arousal to pool between the brunette's legs. It felt like hands and tongues were everywhere, and Regina was losing her damn mind.

"Fuck, it's like you taste even better than before," the Dark One said from between her legs. She was still being slow, gentle, the complete opposite of her new persona.

"Emma please, I need more."

She felt the blonde smirk against her center before she doubled her efforts, swirling her tongue in intricate patterns. It still wasn't the primal, animalistic fucking that they usually partook in, but her climax was building nonetheless.

Regina's hands were back in the white-blonde hair, raking against Emma's scalp, trying to ground herself as she got higher, and higher, and–

She came with a guttural moan, pelvis rocking against Emma's mouth as she rode out her orgasm. The blonde slowed her tongue as she came down, drawing out every last wave of pleasure she could.

It was when Regina had regained her senses, coming down from her orgasm, that she realized Emma was still very much clothed.

Regina got to work pulling down Emma's leather pants, but when they refused to budge past her mid-thigh, the brunette waved her hand, and they were gone.

"Oh, that's no fun," the blonde mused. "Always in such a hurry."

Regina's eyes raked down Emma's half-naked form. Emma always wore thongs for their rendezvous... or maybe all the time, she wasn't sure. But apparently, the Dark One chose to wear nothing at all, and evidence of her arousal was already present on her inner thighs.

The blonde unzipped her bustier-like top, discarding it somewhere on the ground behind her. Regina sat up, ridding the woman of her bra before taking her breast in her hand and palming it, already feeling her nipple grow hard. With everything else already being ass-backward, Regina got her second wind, and flipped Emma around in one swift move, so that now she was on top of the blonde. Regina kissed her hard, possessively; as if she could own what was left of her soul with her lips, and steal her love with her tongue.

The blonde gave into the kiss, running her hands across Regina's bare back and shoulders. The blonde was having trouble... feeling things since she became the Dark One. She couldn't muster up more than mild indifference towards the Pirate, and when it came to her parents, she knew she loved them, but everything felt muted. With Regina though, she felt like a semblance of her former self, and she intended to savor it.

While her emotions were dampened, the opposite could be said when it came to anything physical. The slightest touch sent off fireworks behind her eyes, and every caress felt like fire beneath her skin.

Emma gasped as Regina straddled her hips, hands all over her. Claiming with hands the way they had always done with eyes and mouth before - a mouth that, normally so taunting, was now busy warm and wet following the path that fingers traced.

Where before, Emma came in seeming cold and remote, there was none of that now. She felt blisteringly alive, dizzyingly present, nails raking through Regina's hair as she pulled the woman in for a biting kiss.

"Thought you'd think yourself above such carnal desires," Regina felt the need to say between kisses. "Emotions are a liability, blah blah blah."

"Sounds like your mother," Emma replied, "which is the last person I want to be thinking about right now."

"Enough talking."

"You sta-ah..." Emma trailed off as Regina plunged two fingers into her aching center. The Dark One's legs fell further open on their own accord, her hips rolling forward to meet Regina's thrusts. Emma has been craving physical contact longer than she'd care to admit. Their journey to Camelot was all about expelling the darkness, and there was no time for their secret late-night trysts, not like Regina remembered that.

Regina added another finger and quickened her pace. She can tell by the way Emma's face is strained and her breath is labored that she's close. She just needs a little more and so Regina shifts and takes Emma's clit into her mouth. A few more thrusts later and Emma moans Regina's name with a strangled cry as she comes all over Regina's hand.

Regina savors the taste, lapping up as much as possible before lifting her head so can look at Emma, who looked so peaceful and blissed out and so unlike the Dark One that she could almost pretend everything was okay. She removed her fingers before crawling under the covers.

"I forgot how good you were at that," Emma muttered in her post-orgasm haze.

"There's a lot of things I've forgotten, but you don't see me complaining," the brunette snapped, her voice sounding sharper than she intended.

The blonde muttered something that Regina didn't catch, and she turned over and went to sleep, trusting that the Dark One still knew the way out.

::::

Regina woke up to the sun shining through the curtains, and tendrils of hair that decidedly wasn't hers tickling her cheek.

"Emma?" Regina was surprised to find the blonde in her bed; she never stayed the night.

"Hmm?" She groaned, her face in the pillow and her ash-white hair splayed out around her.

"I know you don't need sleep."

Emma turned over, and she had honestly looked like she had been sleeping. "I've learned to slow myself down to a near comatose state... so kind of sleep. Keeps me feeling normal," she stretched, the swells of her breasts peeking out from beneath the comforter.

Laying like this, side by side as the morning sun filtered in, Regina could almost pretend that this was normal. She could pretend that as soon as Emma left, she wouldn't be wreaking havoc on Storybrooke once again, leaving an epic mess in her wake that Regina would have to clean up.

"Do you... want some clementine juice or something?" Regina asked awkwardly, not used to waking up to house guests.

"Clementine juice?"

"Yes, clementine. It's sweeter and less acidic than orange juice. Better for your teeth."

Emma laughed. "Leave it to you to have a thing against orange juice."

"Yes well." Regina got out of bed and retrieved her housecoat from behind the door, covering the silk pajamas that she had fallen asleep in.

Emma rose from the bed as well, naked as the day she was born. "Put some clothes on dear Gods" Regina chided, throwing an oversized t-shirt that Emma had left behind once at her head.

"It didn't bother you last night," Emma said with a sort of smug satisfaction as she pulled the 'Led Zeppelin' shirt over her head.

Regina didn't dignify that with an answer, and just rolled her eyes and went into the ensuite to brush her teeth. When she came out, Emma was gone, but she heard the woman moving about in the kitchen. Descending the stairs, she was surprised to see the Dark One with flour on her cheek, elbows deep in homemade pancakes in the time it took her to brush her teeth and run a comb through her hair.

"What on earth are you doing Miss Swan?"

The blonde looked at her as if it was the most normal thing in the world. "Breakfast? The coffee should be done any minute." Emma went back to flipping pancakes and setting them on a platter beside her.

"This is absurd," Regina said to no one in particular as she got a glass of juice and sat at the kitchen island.

"What?" The blonde said, popping a piece of bacon into her mouth whole. "I can cook, I just choose not to."

Regina glared at the woman, putting a few pancakes on her plate and drizzling syrup over them. "Yes, that's what I'm referring to."

Emma sat down across from Regina, stacking more pancakes than were strictly necessary on her plate (after all, the Dark One doesn't need to eat).

"So, what now?" Regina asked after she swallowed a bite of pancakes.

"Same as always I figure," Emma answered with a shrug.

The brunette hummed by way of a response.

"I should get going."

Regina sighed. "Murder and mayhem to get on with?"

Emma smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. "Someone's got to do it." A cloud of dark grey smoke swirled around Emma, and when it cleared, she was back to the pristine Dark One persona she had crafted for herself, all crimson lipstick and tight leather. "Tomorrow night?"

Regina knows she shouldn't agree. She shouldn't get used to this new gentler Emma that only seems to exist in the deepest pits of her darkness, and yet, she found herself nodding. Emma crossed the kitchen and gave her a kiss on the cheek before walking right out the front door as if she was going to work for the day instead of to wreak havoc on the town.

Regina doesn't know what to think. She doesn't know what to feel. She goes about her morning as if nothing out of the ordinary happened, and when she went upstairs to shower, she was surprised to find the Dark One dagger still on her nightstand.

Later that day, when Regina and the Charmings walk in on Emma, all sharp edges and brusqueness trying to steal something from her vault, she doesn't know what to think. When the Dark One is out in full force, with her hand around Regina's neck daring her to thwart her plans, she doesn't know what to think.

And when Emma is in her bed into the early hours of the morning, whispering sweet nothings into her ear, she doesn't know what to think. All she knows is that she's going to get Emma back, her Emma, if it's the last thing she does.

THE END