(A/N I was inspired by puckettisms awesome post on tumblr. at: puckettisms. / post/96948305111. the site wont let the full reference even spaced out but if you can't sort it out and find it; i can email it seperately.)
Imagine Puckentine, it's fine.
I think about it all the time, and so, this rhyme.
I think about these two sweet girls, with love divine;
So happy together.
Cat couldn't believe it. They were having a graduation dance. Hollywood Arts was having their first big, fancy, dressup dance at an offsite venue. Her graduation dance would be held at the Beverly Grand Ballroom at the Beverly Hills Hilton. The same room where the Golden Globes were held.
Everyone knew it was because Tori Vega was graduating. The girl who had started the annual Prome in the Asphalt Cafe. She had conceived of the idea for a graduation dance, she had planned it and she was the one who brainstormed ideas. Most of which brought in a few hundred dollars and she was looking at the West LA V.F.W.
Not even a toilet stall when compared to where it eventually would be held. But an acceptable size and quality for a small high school to have a very pleasant dance.
But then Andre wrote a song called Party? Party!. Cat had sung with Tori and Jade on the video that Beck directed and filmed. They had been hoping this might give them four hundred dollars; equal to the bikini car wash, the biggest fund raiser at the time. But it just kind of sat there for the first few weeks and eventually they needed to come up with a few more ideas to get the rest of the money they would need to cover the bill and be able to keep the ticket prices at a nominal fee that really welcomed all students.
But then the video had gone viral. Like the Diddly Bops, but in a good way this time. The proceeds from downloads on PearBeats were what was paying the majority of the bill so the graduation dance could be had at one of the top six most famous and expensive ballrooms in Los Angeles and tickets could still be fourteen dollars a person and twenty five for couples.
Cat actually thought it was pretty cool that Tori was responsible for almost everything, but she and Jade still paid their 25 dollars just like everyone else. And Cat would too, she just wanted to see if she was going to have a date first.
Robbie asked her the moment the dance was announced. She had been dreading exactly that and had gotten herself worked up. So when it happened she had gone off on him a bit.
"Milady will you do me the honor of accompanying me on an evening of mirth, to celebrate our graduation from-" Robbie began with his fake douchey gallantry
"No Robbie, no!" She interrupted. "I used to consider you one of my closest friends, but you have been chasing me for years. I've tried to be nice, I've tried to be mean. I've tried to be everything in between, but you just wont get it. I'm not interested."
"How do you know you aren't interested if you don't go with me?" Robbie countered.
"Do you honestly think that there is something magical about dating you. That somehow nobody can imagine what it might be like without experiencing it. I've been at a dance with you at the Cow Wow. Where you kissed me. On the mouth. I would have just asked you not to do it again but I felt your tongue try to go in. So I ran. If you had shown remorse that still might have saved our friendship but that was just the first step on a relentless campaign of you chasing me and never taking no for an answer. You went from my best guy friend to the person I trust least who I still consider a friend. Are you going to ruin even that?" Cat asked, almost ready to cry.
"Why do you have to be such a little bitch? After all I've done for you. When anyone calls you stupid or just weird, I ignore it. I don't let it change my mind. Sometimes I even add '- and cute' in my head. Where do you think a selfish weird little tease like you is gonna find someone else. That roommate of yours you're always talking about? She sure didn't seem to be thinking of you when she was kissing me. How many times has she kissed you. Never, I'm betting. Be normal, for once in your life and stop being so selfish and do this."
Cat was crying, both hurt and angry. But Tori and Jade were right there. "So its not normal to want to date a girl?" Tori asked.
"That's not what I'm saying. But I know Cat isnt like that." Robbie said.
"I dated Beck for years before even I knew. Tori had to fall in love before she would admit it to herself. I know everyone thought we were het. So what gives you mystical powers to know whats best for Cat?" Jade said.
"Don't be like that. You know what I mean. Its not that there's anything wrong with being a lesbian. Cat just doesnt happen to be one. Cat loves me. I know she does. She was made for me. and I will make her mine. If I have to be patient, I'll be patient, but I will have her in the end. And nothing is going to stop that." Robbie was adamant.
"Yeah nothing like, Cat's preferences for instance? That nothing?" Jade asked. "Fuckin muppy." Jade finished with a reference to the guys who campaigned that girl's cartoon My Little Puppy was for boys too. Except they were almost all perverted misogynistic adult men. Actual boys and non-creepy men felt no reason to campaign for their right to watch the show. They just assumed that all tv is for everyone regardless of the target demographic. They called themselves muppies after male puppies.
When Louis Shrugger asked Cat later that day she made an effort to be a little kinder. Rather than just calling him the blonde shrugger like the rest of her friends, Cat had made an effort to learn his name. Actually Cat had made a vow that she would learn the name of all the shruggers. Just because they were not as outgoing as her and her friends, they were still people and Cat felt just referring to them collectively as the shruggers was a little dehumanizing.
Though she still used Shrugger as their collective last name and didn't really know much more than names. She was open to getting to know them, but they didn't share, they shrugged and she wasn't interested in giving them the third degree.
Louis approached her. "I'm afraid your argument with Robbie may have soured your day and I do not want to seem too forward. But I was wondering if you might consider going to the dance with me."
Cat smiled and said, "Louis, I'm flattered and you are certainly handsome and seem very nice. You are the first person to ask me not counting Robbie, and if I didnt have someone special in mind, I would certainly go with you. But I'm sorry, I cant say yes. I have someone special and if they dont ask me. I will go alone and just have fun with my friends. I'll save a dance for you though."
"Okay. Thanks Cat, see you around." Louis said and left.
Jade immediately walked up. "So you are finally gonna make a move with Sam?"
"I hope so, I want to. But I don't know how she feels. I don't know if she'll ask me." Cat replied.
"It's your school. Shouldn't you ask her?" Jade pointed out.
"Oh, I couldn't." Cat sqaid, "I don't even know if she feels that way about me."
"But you know you feel that way about her. So ask her." Jade said.
"Jade, you know me better than that, I'm not exactly the asking people to dances type." Cat said.
"You asked Daniel to the Kickback and I know you asked Tug to the Prome. How is this different?"
"Daniel was my last attempt to be a certain way with boys. And Tug was specifically to get away from Robbie. Every time with a boy after that if you look you can see where it was just me trying to get away from Robbie. But, this is Sam. Sam, Jade. This is Sam." Cat tried to explain, obviously feeling very strongly.
"No matter how many times you say Sam, its not going to make me understand what you are talking about." Jade said.
"I'm talking about Sam, Jade. I don't know how I could make that any clearer. Sam is Sam. And you know Sam. You've hung out with her. She is the coolest, smartest, most beautiful girl in the world. Well, not the smartest, obviously. But she's smart enough. Are you saying Sam's not smart?" Cat's voice got louder near the end and she was looking at Jade like she might be about to fight for Sam's honor.
"Of course Sam is smart. And thats why she will know how lucky she is to have a girl like you asking her to the dance?" Jade said. She had gotten a lot nicer since her and Tori started dating.
"I'm not doing that. I can't Jade. You know I can't." Cat said.
"Okay. Alright, babe, we'll think of something." Cat was the only person Jade called babe except Beck and Tori, and they were only called that while she was dating them. Cat had been 'babe', though rarely in public, to Jade since ninth grade. It didn't happen often, but enough to cause some to suspect that there was something going on there. These 'babe' moments had become more common since Tori and Jade connected, like everything pleasant and playful about the thorny girl.
Just like she used to get angry with the rumors about her and Cat, now she laughed playfully and winked when the question came up.
The new found peace and happiness that Jade found with Tori was why she took it upon herself to give Sam a call.
"Hey, Jade." Sam answered.
"Hey." Jade replied. "How are things?"
"I'm filled with an unspeakable rage. But that's normal. We still on for Throw Daddy in the Woodchipper 3 on Friday?" Sam asked. She and Jade had become horror movie buddies since the two of them loved them, while Tori and Cat couldnt stand them at all.
"Of course. One and two are both in my top 5 best forestry tools versus zombies films of all time." Jade said.
"Well naturally. The things they did with ichor. To make the zombie blood the reddish brown of dead drying blood but with the green of rot mixed in. It changed the genre. The idea that zombie blood didn't have to be black was revolutionary. And that it could have layered but still identifiable color without becoming brown muck." Sam said.
"I agree. People think with the prevalence of computer imagery that people weren't making an effort to improve practical effects. But its just not true. Especially not in makeup. Especially in horror." Jade said.
"Well. Horror movies are the most likely to have bugets low enough they can't afford the time and money of realistic CGI so the choices are practical or shitty CGI that could ruin an entire movie." Sam replied.
"True, very true." Jade said. "But I actually called to talk about something. Not just chat horror movies."
"Oh, really?" Sam said. "What's up, buddy?"
"You know that party song we did that seems to be everywhere these last two months? Well we're using the money to pay for a graduation dance. It's to celebrate our class graduating, but everyone in the school is welcome." Jade began.
"That's great, Jade. Really awesome of you guys." Sam said, clearly trying to be supportive, but just as clearly wondering if her friend knew her at all. No one who knew her could ever think she would care about any school activity at a school she didn't go to.
"Cat wants you to ask her. I know you like her. Anyone with eyes can see you like her, and can see that you should be together." Jade said.
"I don't know if that would be a good idea. Cat is the most beautiful talented girl I've ever known. Of course, I've thought of being with her. How could I not? But our friendship means too much to me. I couldn't risk our friendship. I wouldn't be able to handle it if she didn't want to be my friend or my roomate anymore."
"I guess that's possible. But its incredibly improbable. And if you take a chance you could end up with the girl of your dreams. I know I did." Jade said. She paused a minute then the dreamy smile dropped off her face to be replaced by a snarky smirk as she said, "I mean dont be boring and stupid. Take a chance."
"You don't know what would happen to me if I lost her. I cant do that, I can't even imagine doing that." Sam said.
"Well try to imagine it. Because you need to give some serious thought to if you are really so afraid that you are willing to disappoint someone who cares about you so much. She's decided if she cant go with you, she won't take a date. Its you or no one to her, Puckett. Think about that." Jade said and hung up.
Jade and Tori gave Cat a ride home and ended up staying for dinner. When they left and Sam and Cat were getting ready for bed, Sam said, "It's pretty neat about that dance you guys got together."
"Tori got it together. Jade and I just helped out, singing on that song." Cat said.
"But still. You have something to be proud of." Sam said.
"I suppose. I am glad that we were able to give this to our school and our class." Cat replied.
"Jade was telling me Robbie tried to ask you."
"Ask? It was practically a demand." Cat said.
"Yeah, that's what Jade said. Want me to visit him and teach him some manners? I have something I've been meaning to try out. It's a replacement for the butter sock. In keeping with the dairy theme its a cast iron cow spoonrest in a sock. It still weighs about a pound but somehow, iron seems to be more effective when hitting someone than butter was." Sam said.
"I can see how it would be, but I dont want you turning to violence for me." Cat replied.
"It won't be 'turning to'. Violence is pretty much my favorite tool for problem solving. Plus, I'd do anything for you." Sam said.
"Oh Sam, thank you. I'd do anything for you too." Cat said, beaming.
"I know you would, kid. Speaking of, I was wondering if you could help me with something I'm thinking about." Sam began.
"Anything thats on your mind, just tell me." Cat said.
"Well, Cat... I don't know. Forget it." Sam stammered.
"Now, Sam. Come on. Whatever you are going through, I am here for you. I want to be and I think I can be very useful to you." Cat said. "Just tell me, Sam. I want to help."
"I don't know. I'm not trying to hide anything, Cat. I just dont know where to start." It was at this moment Sam realized she had never said, 'Cat, I am gay'. And she had certainly never said a girl was cute in anything but the most general of terms to Cat.
Her own interest in her roomate started very early in their friendship, and she thought, probably correctly, that if she ever wanted to have Cat interested in her, she needed to never give the other girl cause to be jealous.
It was also a fact that Cat did, in fact, have no reason to ever be jealous. Since they had gotten to know each other Sam had honestly never thought of any other girl in more than the most simple and general terms.
Cat was truly the only girl Sam wanted. And Sam was so interested in her there just wasnt room for anyone else. But could she really ask her to the dance? Did she really even believe this amazing girl wanted to go with her?
"Is there anyone you do want to go to the dance with?" Sam asked.
Now it was Cat's turn to get flustered and wander off vocally as she quickly wracked her brain for how to be honest without exposing how she felt. "Well... you see, Sam. That is a question. And it is a good, question, Sam. Sam, I am not saying it's not a good question. Because it is. And like all good questions it is straightforward, easy to understand, and it has a simple answer."
"Would you like to share the simple answer with me?" Sam joked.
"Of course I would, Sam. Sam, I would want to share anything with you. I want you to be comfortable with me, Sam. And Sam, I want you to feel we have an open honest relationship." Cat sounded giggly and nervous but then very sincere and almost serious on the last sentence. It was this and her excessive overuse of Sam's name that finally gave the blonde the idea that her little red velvet crush, might be crushing back just as hard.
"Okay, Cat, who would you like to ask you?" Sam asked.
"Someone." Cat said, "Someone we both know. But it's silly. It's crazy. I don't even know why I got my hopes up. Sam, That's how silly it is."
Sam knew this was as far as it was going to go. No names would be mentioned out loud, unless she put herself out there and let Cat know she was at least open to considering going to the dance together.
"Okay, Cat," Sam began. "The reason I ask is because, I am not saying someone said you wanted to go with me. But I am under the impression maybe you do. I don't know where I got that idea or if I am totally off base."
Cat smiled shyly and said, "No, you're on base, Sam. It is you. You are the one I am hoping will ask me."
Sam let out a big sigh and said, "Whoo, that was a lot harder than it feels like we should have let it be. We trust each other. We should be able to be honest if we like each other as more than friends. I really want to thank you Cat. For just coming out and putting it on the line and telling me that. See you in the morning, Cat. And thanks again." And Sam rolled over and went to sleep.
Leaving Cat to wonder if this meant they were or werent going to the dance together.