Always
So there he was once again facing his foe, the one that always got in the way. What a persistent annoyance he had become, but the blonde could never rid of him, nor the riddles that the albino left behind for him to decipher. There were feelings that were neglected, feelings unpredictable, and many thoughts that swarmed through him. Standing there, a gun out lashed and garnished his rugged and rough appearance. "I know you have it, so hand it over." The last remaining proof of his youth and innocence was held in the enemy's hands, and it held an advantage over him. Yet, never was it perceived as a weapon, but still a threat. Mello had awaited this moment, for it had been years since he had seen the other. Despite all the resentment, cool air, and distances in personalities, Mello had imagined and fantasized about this day. It wasn't the way he desired it though, standing there with the nozzle of the gun focused at the other. Instead, he wished to embrace him, yet that would never occur, not in his mind at least. Silence mocked him, filling the room as Near placed a domino down before glancing up, peering through the curled bangs.
"Perhaps you are here for more than the motives than I believe." A finger rose to a curl, wrapping the strand around it, the monotone voice breaking through the silence. A hand went out to motion the task for to lower their guns. "I would like you all to leave Mello and I in peace. Although the situation seems hostile, I shall be alright." And Near truly knew that Mello would not slay him as if he were nothing. For, they were in the same, needing the same things, trying to reach for the same goal. Why Mello never saw them as equals, Near would never know. As the moments passed, the task force exited the room, and once gone, Mello lowered his caliber. It was placed in the holster, and Near lined up a domino next to his newest tower. "I know that you do not trust me, however…" He pulled the photo out and held it out to the blonde. "I have known that you would return." And that was correct. He did return and there was no way that he was leaving just yet. He needed answers, and he was going to get them.
Mello stood with his hands at his sides before a hand outreached for the photo, but as he grasped it, Near's index finger caressed the top of his gloved hand. That, he did notice. What was this a sign of? Near was always a robot, empty, mechanical, and aesthetic. When did he ever show affection through touch? "What the fuck do you want from me?" Crass and condescending tones laced his words, but inside he was waging a war against his heart and mind. His mind said to turn away and leave, but the thudding of his heartbeat told him to remain. No steps were taken, shallow breaths were inhaled and exhaled, and shakiness corrupted his hands, making him clutch the photo in his grasp. No longer was Mihael real, nor alive. There was just Mello. He had transformed into a murderer, a man of crime, not an innocent boy that wanted to simply pursue the career of a detective. But people change.
Despite knowing what Mello had turned to, been corrupted by, Near began to focus on his emotions that were buried, but boiling to the brim. There were differences between the males, yet both were incapable of accurately dictating their emotions and depicting them correctly. Even if given the proper tools, both young men were incapable of dissecting the feelings that suffocated them. "I want nothing from you, but one thing." Near paused as his hand dropped to his knee from his curl. "Listen." Before Mello could protest, Near took in a deep breath, letting the oxygen fill his lungs, readying himself for his lecture, for his words. "We have known each other since boyhood, but never did I think I would ever understand you. For the longest while, I believed that you hated me because I simply scored higher on every test, and I was capable of containing the few emotions I experienced." A pause. "However, I found that you were not angry at me, but the situation, and yourself. An inferiority complex is something you have struggled with, and I could never understand what you experience. Yet, I want to explain to you that I have always felt a strong sense of fondness toward you because I was always certain you would surpass me, despite grades." In short, he had faith in Mello, even if he never expressed it until now.
For a moment, Mello had to process the information he was given. It was interesting to him, but he tilted his head to the left, examining and scrutinizing every detail of Near. How he noticed the male was diminutive, harmless looking, but looks were deceiving. Mello knelt down onto his knees before Near. "You are correct. I was never mad at you, but you were always better." He was not going to give in easily to what the male said, but he really did care. With an expel of a sigh, with a heart focused on its goal, Mello grasped Near's chin. "There is no way I am going to ever believe that you had faith in a soul like me." He bit his bottom lip just to release it. "After everything, I have committed one too many crimes for you to accept me." Emotions were running high, but it was becoming easier to open up, yet, it was alarming. A focused gaze, a heart yearning for more, he continued to grasp Near's chin.
"Quite the contrary, dear Mello, I have always found myself wanting to be close to you, always admiring you. You have been able to do things I never could." He paused and then tugged on a curl. "If there was a better way to express it… I am your number one fan." Those words exited and passed his lips, but soon after those words escaped, Mello's expression turned into a sickened grimace. Now, Near believed he took the wrong steps. Did he cross a line? As he began to question himself, he let his eyes wander over Mello's new features. Even with the marred flesh, he wanted to reach out and touch the rough terrain, for it looked sensitive, yet calloused. Never had he seen something so raw before, and perhaps that is what caught his eye. Then again, it was a symbolization of the internal struggles that Mello suffered from. Near already held that knowledge.
Before more words could be uttered, Mello's heart won him over, overwhelming him. Lips pressed to Near's, letting that flesh tingle against the others. It was tantalizing, peck after peck, his tongue slowly licking at Near's bottom lip. He couldn't handle it anymore. All the suppressed feelings were overflowing, spilling over his sense of right and wrong, sensible and ridiculous. Near's hands inched their way to the front of Mello's vest, resting softly on his chest, even fingers rolling around the rosary that hung from his sturdy neck. The kiss was sweet, a bit rough. His heart continued to pound heavily in his chest, the thudding never stopping. Even with Near, his heart began to pitter patter rapidly. Was this the way it was supposed to be? Near knew not to take the risk, yet here he was, snapping into the apple of lust, giving into Mello's will.
But wasn't it both of their willingness to give into each other? Through the past of their lives, through the fires of hell, and through the non-stop competition, here they were, embracing one another. Mello's arm slipped around Near's waist, pulling him closer to him, willing to let his tongue push past Near's gaping lips. The appendage traced the smooth teeth before push past further to trace the other tongue that was inexperienced and nervous. A gasp, a groan, slipping into more of the sea of emotion, Near attempted to keep up with that moment, but Mello held more emotion into it. With the rapid beating of their hearts, they lost track of the time. It was now exposed that both Near and Mello repressed those emotions of love. "Love me." Mello grunted lowly as his hands slipped under Near's shirt, their time was limited.
A squeak of innocence was emitted from pale lips before curls rustled as he bobbed his head. "Always." Always was a long while, but Near would mean it forever. The time passed as they began to kiss once more, but with Kira on the loose, with time ticking away rapidly, they couldn't continue. With a quick pull, Mello broke the kiss. "I… I have to leave Near." Mello uttered, staring into the albino's eyes. This was a difficult situation, but both knew they had a task at hand. With very short time, very little words, Near continued to sit there now, half breathless, half heart broken. "Come back to me…" His voice was barely above a whisper as he watched the blonde stand. After moments of silence, Mello nodded, giving a genuine smile. "I will do my best." And with those words, Mello turned on his heel to leave Near.
As the Kira case came to a close, Near had a destination he had to visit. As he sat in the back of the car, he twirled his curl, thinking, contemplating. Kira was gone, the case was finalized. The car came to an abrupt stop, the drive letting Near out. For a while, he followed the cobblestone path, that was all until he stopped at the black tombstone, the etching in a calligraphy script. 'Mihael Keehl, January 26th…" Careful steps were taken before he knelt down, his hands wiping some dirt off the stone. A chocolate bar was settled against the marble, tear drops hit the material. "Always…" He whispered before his fingers once more traced the letters of Mello's name. "I will always love you…" It was difficult for him, but as he sat there he would always know, his heart belonged to one man and one man only. And although most would believe Near to be alone, every night he grasped that rosary, knowing Mello was always and forever with him.