Prologue
Today, I knew something bad would happen. How? I have no idea. It was just one of those feelings that you just know will be correct. And it happened because I loved Axel. And I think that's what bothers me the most of all about this.
It was a normal day, for me at least. As I walked to school I had a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. But, like I usually did, I tried to brush it off. Sora always said I was too much of a worry-wart.
I went through all of my morning classes relatively quickly and without incident. This was calming to the little bit of worry I still had. But, I reminded myself, the day still isn't over.
At lunch, I walked outside to me and Axel's usual table, taking a seat and relaxing. I was so glad school was almost over. I breathed in the fresh air as I waited the usual 5 minutes for my insane redhead and our friends.
What I didn't know was, while I was sitting there enjoying the silence, I was being watched. And little did I know that the person who was watching me would approach me. And I couldn't even have guessed that he would just take a seat beside me and start to speak.
"Hello, Roxas." He said, his evil smirk mocking me along with his fake happy voice. I growled at him.
"What the hell do you want, bastard?" I asked him, my tone letting him know I was more then a little pissed at him. He just chuckled. Darkly, I might add.
"You wanna know something?" He asked me, smirking. I just continued to glare at him. He grinned evilly and continued. "If you don't do what I say...-" He started, a serious threatening tone in his voice. I gulped quietly. "-I'll kill your precious Axel." He finished, pulling away from me and smiling. Something inside me told me he was serious.
"...do you swear you or anyone you know will ever go near him and my friends again?" I asked him, completely serious. Seifer, though a bad person, always kept his promises and swears. No matter what. He smirked and held out his hand for me to shake.
"I swear." He shook my hand and let go quickly, pulling me up with him as he stood. Then, he whispered into my ear what he wanted me to do, laughing when he finished.
My eyes were wide and tears were filling up my vision, blurring it. I nodded slowly, shakily. If it's for Axel...I'll always do it. He smiled and walked away, glancing back only once.
Once he was gone, tears were falling. So many tears. I hated this...but it must be done. Otherwise Axel will die.
When Axel, Demyx, Zexion, and a few of our other friends arrived, I composed myself and acted as if there was nothing wrong. I smiled, I laughed. But on the inside, I was crying and weeping.
I had to commit suicide in front of Axel. I had to jump off of Twilight Bridge. One of the catches, I couldn't tell Axel why I was killing myself. I had to make up something. But, I had a way where Axel would find out. Eventually.
You see, I have a notebook. When me and my family moved here, I was given a notebook from Leon. He told me I should make it into a journal. I actually decided too and I have from the day I met Axel to yesterday. I had one page left. I'll write down the real reason on that last page and give it to him.
When all of my friends as well as Axel left, I took out my notebook and started to write. I wrote everything I was feeling even if it was a little chill from the wind. I filled up the whole page, finishing the last sentence with 'I love you forever'.
I slowly stood up, putting away my notebook and walking to the front of the school. I sat down on the front steps and sighed. I wasn't gonna attend the rest of my classes. It's not like I'll need it where I'm going.
Suddenly, a thought occurred to me. I should call Leon, to say goodbye. I pulled out my cellphone and quickly dialed the brunette's number.
"Hello?" He answered. When I heard his voice, it hurt but I swallowed the feeling of sadness and attempted to sound as casual as possible.
"Hello? Hi, Leon. It's Roxas. Um...I'm not going to be home tonight." I told him, making it sound like I was going to be staying with a friend. Though, on the news tomorrow (Leon always watches the news) he'll find out that's not why.
"Okay...you'll be home soon, right?" He asked me, worry obviously present in his voice. Tears were falling from my eyes by that point.
"Y-Yeah, Leon. I-I promise. I've gotta go. Goodbye, I love you." I said quickly and quietly, hanging up the phone soon after. I then called Riku and said about the same thing.
After calling Riku I texted Sora. (A/N: Italics in this part is the text message.) Sora. Not gonna be able to come home 2 nite. Axel will explain l8ter today or tomorrow. I love you.
I soon received a reply saying okay, he loved me too and to be safe. I chuckled lightly but sadly. This really was it.
Eventually, I heard the bell ring, ending classes for the weekend. I stood up and walked to the side to wait for Axel. Soon enough, the tall, lanky, redhead emerged from the blob of students hurrying out of the school.
He was soon by my side and I opened my mouth to speak.
"A-Axel...can you walk with me somewhere for a few minutes?" I asked my redhead nervously. I admit it. I was scared to death. Heh. How ironic. Scared to death. Literally.
"Sure, Roxy!" Axel replied excitedly. I gulped. He thought this was gonna be a good thing...
I began to walk us to the bridge, fidgeting the whole way. I was actually gonna do it. I was going to kill myself. Kill myself for the love of my life.