Hayate's Cursed Errand

Author's Note: () Means -Beep- since they don't accept other forms of censorship like the asterix sign, please read and review, thanks.


A typical day in the Sanzen'in mansion… Tama lies in the garden sniffing flowers, Klaus, the head butler is idly cleaning an unknown bust, Maria cooking lunch in the kitchen, Hayate shelving books in the Sanzen'in library and finally Nagi… who is no where to be found?

"HAYATE!" shouts Nagi almost in distress from the basement.

"Hai Ojou-Sama" Appears Hayate almost instantly, "What seems to be the matter?"

"I was building my model of the Arc()()()gel, when I realized I was missing the parts for the front Pos()()ron Cannon. I need to get the parts for them as well as others I found unsuitable. I've already ordered the parts from the original sets of the Gu()()()m company, you just need to collect them from Ban()()()." As she tossed her wielding goggles onto the nearby work bench.

"Hai Ojou-Sama, would there be anything else as well?" Smile Hayate as usual.

"Come to think of it, Hayate we need to return that Haru()() anime video as well, might as well return it to Wataru-Kun on you're way."

Hayate then prepare to leave the Sanzen'in mansion, but then Maria called out him before he left.

"Ah Hayate-Kun, since you're going out, would you mind taking Izumi's pendent back to her, she left it here last night when she slept with Nagi."

"Alright Maria-San." Smiled Hayate.

As Hayate took the pendent, it glowed black with bad luck, though unseen by the naked eye, it begun to start the cogwheels of curses that would befall Hayate. As he left the mansion, suddenly the mansion's security system malfunctioned and sent the three security bots scurrying for him.

"Watch out Hayate-Kun!" Shouted Maria as the three security bots dashed in to attack him.

"JET ()()()()() ATTACK!" Screamed the first security bot.

"I've got to run off to complete the errands." Said Hayate as he jumped on each of the security bots.

"Gah! He counted our attack! Let's run him over again!" Announced the same security bot.

As Hayate ran for his life towards Lake Sanzen'in to try and lose the robots, they managed to keep up with him, even as he jumped over Tama sleeping in Maria's flower garden, the robots ran over him and the flower garden leaving an indistinguishable plot of mud with Tama in the middle of it, and as he readied to chase them. However Maria rounded the corner and saw him in the brown patch that was once her beloved Garden and immediately she smiled an evil grin and Tama was jumping into the Lake even before Maria kicked him in and she continued her chase of Hayate and the three robots.

As the robots finally cornered Hayate, Maria walked up behind them, but the robots already sensed her demonic aura and turned in fear as they shivered and dashed past her with their dust flying high in the air.

"Ah, thank you Maria-San." Thanked Hayate.

"Well Hayate-Kun you better be going before something happens again." As she giggled as if there wasn't the slightest bit of fury in her.

Finally Hayate could leave the Sanzen'in estate and go on his errands, so firstly he proceeded towards the Ban()()() Building in the middle of town to collect the parts for Nagi's model. As he entered the building, the security guards stopped him immediately and demand he state his reason and purpose for the visit.

"What is such a seedy looking, poor faced, down on his luck butler who looks as if he has a 156,804,000 yen debt to pay off and has attempted a kidnapping of a rich girl that he now works for, want in out company?" Asked the black faced security guard.

"I'm here to collect parts for my master." Replied Hayate with a short 'hehe'.

"You mean you're here to steal our highly top secret parts of our Gu()()()ms that will be used in our next Gu()()()m project entiled Gu()()()m ()(), but since you now know the existence of top secret Gu()()()m ()(), you may not leave this building alive! Call in the Knigh()()()()es! We have a security leak!"

"Ehhhhh!? I'm not a thief!" Shouted Hayate as Knightmares zoomed in like Gundams on roller-skates.

'Apprehend that thief!' and 'Surrender' were the general sounds of shouting coming from the Knightmares as they started shooting their weapons at Hayate. He tried running for the exit but they were immediately sealed with 10 inch steel plates and he had to destroy a few Knightmares to avoid being killed. As he evaded the different weapons being shot at him, his phone rang with a ring tone that sounded like something out of a mahou shojo anime which he didn't recognize as it was the ring tone that Nagi had programmed. He saw it was Nagi's number and immediately answered.

"Hello?Ojou-Sama?"

"Hayate, about those parts I ordered. You need to tell them you're from the Sanzen'in, if not those secretive guys from Ban()()() won't give you anything but a chase. Good luck Hayate!" Said Nagi as she put down the phone and got back to work on her model.

"It's a little too late now, but I guess I should tell them." He immediately skidded to a halt and turned a hundred and eighty degrees to face his pursuers.

"Finally ready to give up the thief with the seedy looking, poor faced, down on his luck butler who looks as if he has a 156,804,000 yen debt to pay off and has attempted a kidnapping of a rich girl that he now works for?" Announced the Knightmare.

"Wait! I have something to say, I'm the Sanzen'in butler, I'm here to collect the parts for Ojou-Sama." As he hid his face behind his hands.

"Oh? The Sanzen'in eh? Prove it. If you face my 7th Generation Knigh()()()()e Lanc()()()t and prove the superior Sanzen'in butler combat techniques that is the requirement to be a Sanzen'in butler." Announced a white framed Knightmare.

"Eh… I guess I don't really have a choice then." As Hayate glowed gold. "Ka-me-ha-me…"

"Alright you win, just don't use that technique for fear of our rivals suing us for copyrights. You have proven yourself worthy of being the Sanzen'in butler, the parts are in the underground bunker, please collect them yourself and bring it home." Announced the Knightmare as it retreated.

"I guess I have to collect the parts then." Said Hayate as he approached the elevator.

Entering the circular elevator, he proceeded down into an underground bunker, it took him a full five minutes to reach the bottom. He exited the elevator and entered into a army styled base that looked like the interior of the base at Josh-A in the Gundam Seed anime.

"I feel like I'm in one of the bases in the Gu()()()m S()()d anime." Commented Hayate.

'Ah you're the Sanzen'in butler aren't you?" Enquired a thick bespectacled orange clad engineer.

"Aren't you really dressed for the part as a mechanic from the Gu()()()m S()()d series." Stared Hayate.

"I'll let you in on a little secret, I'm one of the many extra mechanics in the Gu()()()m S()()d series. They don't pay too well for that role so I'm moonlighting as a mechanic here, they just accepted the Gu()()()m S()()d mechanic certificate I got from working there."

"Uh wah is that really true?!" Recoiled Hayate.

"Yea all you got to do is be a Gu()()()m S()()d Otoku and they'll let you work here."

"Erm… hehe… Do you think I could have those parts?"

"Sure the set of 1:1 scale Arc()()()gel parts from the Gu()()()m S()()d series, fully functional that fires Pos()()ron Beams codenamed 'Loh()()()()()n', please carry it yourself, it's in that crate there." Said the mechanic as he left.

"Uh wah? Such a big crate. I guess I'll have to carry it myself." Claimed Hayate as he single handedly carried the container full of parts. "Ah I guess it's too heavy, I guess at times like this I have to use this special card that Maria gave to me."

He slid the card into the hand phone that he had, as suddenly it crackled and a runic circle appeared below and above it and Maria's body appeared in between.

"Ah Hayate-Kun, what impossible task has Nagi set for you this time."

"I have to carry this bulky container back, is there some way to transport it back first?"

"Ah, is that all Hayate-Kun, alright I guess we could use the Sanzen'in's teleporter this time, please carry the phone and attach it to the container that looks like it came from the anime blo()()()."

"Hai Maria-San." As he attached the 'hand phone' as directed.

After he was done the container immediately disappeared and Maria's image claimed that it had arrived as planned, her image then disappeared leaving the hand phone behind. Hayate then returned to the surface and proceed to Wataru's store to return the Video that Nagi had rented. As he left the building, a paint can fell from above him which he immediately avoided, then as he avoided it, a limousine immediately crashed into him that sent him into space. From the limousine, Izumi emerged and muttered to herself.

"Ah we accidentally hit Hayate-Kun. He must have flew to Wataru's shop judging from the angle and force that we hit him, as well as the wind conditions and also due to my ability to see the future. Just like Te()() Roc()()() in Pok()()()()" Whispered Izumi to herself.

As Hayate sailed thru the air and landed on solid concrete that no ordinary person should have been able to survive but was nothing for a seedy looking, poor faced, down on his luck butler who looks as if he has a 156,804,000 yen debt to pay off and has attempted a kidnapping of a rich girl that he now works for, to survive.

"Ah ouch." Groaned Hayate as he landed.

"Ha-ha-yate-Kun?" Stammered Saki as she approached the shop with an armload full of groceries.

"Ah Saki-San. I'm here to return that Haru()() anime video that Nagi borrowed. Here let me help you with those groceries."

"Ah no, it's not necessary!" As she blushed and rushed into the store with Hayate following her in.

"Eh Saki-San, is Wataru-Kun not around?"

"I'll get him, just wait a moment."

Just then, the limousine that hit Hayate earlier pulled up just outside Wataru's store, and Izumi entered the shop just as Wataru entered.

"Ah Izumi, how many I help you today." Smiled Wataru generously.

"Eh… I came… To get something…" Whispered Izumi softly.

"Ah sure, what did you come to get?" Questioned Wataru. "We have many VCDs and DVDs, I'll even let you have a huge discount."

"Ah I'm here for Hayate-Kun." Mumbled Izumi.

"EH!? ME?" Questioned Hayate.

"Why you debt ridden butler!" Misunderstood Wataru.

"EH!? I'm here only to return the video!"

"Prepare to die!" As Wataru attacked Hayate albeit possessed.

Hayate dodged his attack easily and tried to calm him down, though he refused to be calmed down as was his nature. He jumped from shelf to shelf avoiding Wataru's new found strength and agility. Wataru attacked Hayate with demonic eyes and replicated himself to catch Hayate.

"Isn't that the K()()e Bun()()()n no J()()()u!? Since when could you use it?"

"Sir is possessed! Try not to hurt him!" Cried Saki.

He dodged the an attack by Wataru but not completely, tearing his pocket releasing the pendent that belonged to Izumi, as it fell towards the crowd of Izumi's ever loyal body guards, hitting one of them on the head and falling into Izumi's hands. She immediately wrapped it into a talisman and almost instantly, Wataru returned to normal, and as he fell to the ground, his clones disappeared as well. Saki immediately attempted to catch him but tripped and fell but even her efforts were unnecessary as Hayate caught him and landed safely on the ground.

"Ah Saki-San, are you alright?" Asked Hayate.

"Erm I I'm fine. Hayate-Kun." Blushed Saki as she dusted her skirt.

"Thank you Hayate-Kun." Whispered Izumi just loudly enough for Hayate to hear as she left in her limousine.

'Eh, what was that about?" Said a puzzled Hayate.

After he had ensured that Wataru was unharmed, he returned the video to Saki instead and left for the Sanzen'in mansion just in time for afternoon tea. As he entered, the ground shook as he split in half and Nagi unveiled her latest model of a battleship.

"Ojou-Sama, what is this?" Questioned Hayate who looked like an ant from where Nagi was standing.

"This shall bring us to the stars Hayate! Let's reach for the stars!"

"Heh heh… Ojou-Sama..."