So I'm molding this after the character I'm playing through as and yes, Maya. Because. So this is a, what the if the character wanted to stall and do everything else possible then continue on the hero's journey they never actually signed up for but everyone else chose them to do. And also mirrors my thoughts as things happened and what I wish the reaction had been, could of been. Aaaand I'm bored and also stalling doing professional writing because life and jobs are scary. Oh and this takes place after you find Sanctuary again but you know, after that Maya decides to do other things...also don't own.
Angel had nothing to do and no one to talk to which also means she doesn't have to lie or manipulate those she has come to know as friends. It also meant that those friends were unavailable to pass away the time.
She tried Maya first but things got a little awkward.
"Um. I just got betrayed. Oh, wow. Wasn't expecting that!" Maya groaned into her ECHO. Angel felt a tinge of guilt and kept quiet. Then her video feed on the area died. That wasn't supposed to happen.
Maya entered this ridiculous tournament as a way to prolong the inevitable-fighting Handsome Jack and well, Maya was the most badass. . . badass on Pandora and the vault did have money in it this time.
Anyway, the whole event was being broadcast throughout Pandora. Some Hyperion personnel were even placing bets on Maya. This was also something that people were not openly talking about. Death threats and violent deaths are things that most humans like to avoid.
Smart humans.
But let's digress and get back to the action.
"Maya? The video cameras at the arena just shut down. I can bring them back on-"
"Okay. That is new. I'm being poisoned. Fuck."
"What? Maya?"
Maya's ECHO was dead for several seconds longer than Angel accepted.
"Maya!"
"What the f- is going on? The cameras just turned off and I can hear something that sounds like gas. WHERE IS THE VAULT HUNTER?"
Angel's amazing phaseshifting brought the camera up, however-
"That vault hunter bitch is a coward."
Oh.
"What?"
"That freaky bitch found out she would have to fight Piston and fled. Piston names the vault hunter Maya a coward."
"WHAT."
"Balls." Angel sighed quietly
Angel wanted to punch the television. Elsewhere, several Hyperion personnel, who were not watching nor had any care as to how the events played out, also shouted, cursed, and hit things.
"Angel, did you hear that." Maya was speaking through clenched teeth. Her voice was deep and raw. The Siren was not amused.
"I did."
"Sorry Sweetie, but Gary is a back burner issue. That Piston bastard is going down. I will end him. I need time to think. I'm turning off my ECHO."
Angel loved it when she called her father the wrong name.
However that meant that Maya was out. Still Angel wasn't going to give up, she had someone else she could try.
"Roland, how are-
"Sorry, solider but I have too much going on right now. Is this important?"
"No. What's going on?"
"Overlook's medicine was stolen by bandits and I'm hunting them down."
"I see. Good luck, Roland."
"Thanks. Uh. It's good to hear your voice."
So. The two people she actually wanted to talk to the most were busy. This left her watching the security feed at the various Hyperion facilities.
"Break room shenanigans episode 130."
In the last episode Angel discovered a sexy and sordid office romance. Angel also wanted to gorge out her eyes.
There was something that springs to mind. One of her conversions with Maya.
"That's the key to world domination. Coffeemakers that think."
Hmm.
She loved testing out theories. Angel zeroed in on a coffee machine and waited. This could either be a waste of time or she would end up suffering. But, whatever.
"That's right Dave go to the coffee." Angel leaned and watched and waited with anticipation. She bit her lip and focused all energy. Her ECHO was on standby for her notes.
Dave, who was actually name Colin, turned on the machine and leaned against the counter. Nothing particularly interesting.
"Come on, come on." Angel played with her hands, a nervous habit that she no control of.
BAM.
It freaking exploded!
The coffee machine exploded. Glass and bits scattered like a bomb. Poor Dave. He was in the blast radius.
"The coffee machine did not become self aware as far as I can tell," Angel said into her device," however I will continue with my experiments. Perhaps use less energy. Cannot help but notice I felt some form of pleasure out of David's unfortunate accident. Perhaps evilness is an inherited trait. God. I hate my genes."
"Angel."
Oh, balls.
Angel immediately turned off her ECHO. She didn't need a lecture. Do not blow up coffee machines or employees while daddy is home. Angel sighed and went back to mindlessly watching the video feed.
Thought occurring!
Angel's body filled with dread and twingey acid.
If I don't pretend to listen to him on the ECHO he'll come to me personally.
Angel turned it back on with a flash, as if life depended on it.
" It won't happen again, sir."
"Repeat back what I said."
"Balls."
". . . what?"
Crap.
She said that out loud.
"I'll try my best to not malfunction and blow up your employees."
"I don't care about that. That coffee machine, however was expensive."
"It was planning global domination. If anything, I stopped its insubordiation."
There was a wonderful and beautiful delay in his response. Angel enjoyed the silence.
"I'm going to send you more company. You clearly need it."
"The fridge doesn't like you very much either. Shall I take care of it for you, as well? I would be happy to, sir"
"Angel-"
"Excuse me, Sam, that's what my ECHO told his name was, is asking me something. Oh. It wants to marry me! Can we?"
If she was as unbalanced as Tannis. Angel tried to keep from laughing. It was becoming increasingly difficult.
"If it helps, talk to the vault hunters."
"What do you want me to say?"
"Just anything, I don't care! I noticed you're happier when you speak with them."
"They make happy."
For the first time in years.
"You don't smile enough and when you talk to them, you do. It's one of the only reasons I haven't killed them yet."
That and he was a coward who was avoiding it as much as Maya.
This was dangerously close to a declaration of love. Her dad was actually trying to be a concerned father.
Angel looked around at the eridum injectors.
"Daddy."
She hadn't called him that in years. It felt wrong. Tasted wrong. But also, felt kind of right at the moment.
" Yeah, baby?"
Angel lowered herself to the floor and hugged her chest.
"I want to go to sleep."
She closed her eyes.