You'll never guess what my muse made late one night. This may be JD/Cox if I can manage it – sorry guys, I'm a full on slasher.
I don't own Scrubs or... the MIB.
Spanish.
We are the best kept secret in the universe.
We work for a highly funded yet unofficial government agency.
Our mission is to monitor extra-terrestrial activity on Earth.
We are your best, last and only line of defence.
We work in secret.
We exist in Shadow.
And we dress in black.
"God-damn bugs." Nick Lawrence cussed as an insect splattered grossly against his trucks front window. It had definitely not been his day at all. His girlfriend of five years had left him due to her not being happy with his work and now he had to transport a large amount of illegal immigrants. For good money, true, but the darkness of the night seemed to summarise his overall view on the situation.
He stared dumbly at the road, over tired and tense. He had been caught transporting illegal aliens too many times before and he couldn't afford, in the most literal sense, to be caught again.
There were lights appearing in the distance. Nick's heart dropped in his chest.
"Oh shit." Nick apparently wasn't the only one to notice the police car lights that they were speeding closer and closer to as a loud resounding "Oh crap" filled the almost silent van. Knowing it was too late to turn away, Lawrence kept the van going, gradually slowing to a standstill as he approached the convey of police cars in front of him. He winced. There were a lot of police cars waiting. They were all totally screwed. Especially him.
A familiar uniformed figure stalked towards the van, a large smirk on his face. "Nick, Nick, Nick. When are you going to learn?" his smirk widened as he saw the sweat pouring off the nervous driver, "So, where you "coming from" this time?"
"Fishing in Cuernavaca."
The police officer snorted in reply, "Sure you were," he started to walk around the back of the van, "Let's take a look at your catch."
Shaking, Nick pulled his long, gangly form from the small seat of the van and slowly made his way to the back of the van. It was like walking down death row, awaiting to be hung or shot. The police officer wrenched the door open to reveal ten trembling illegal immigrants.
"If it were me, I would have thrown them back." The uniformed man sighed. Nick was so darn predictable.
"Get out the van and line up people."
And an odd array of Hispanic people left the van. While all were different sizes, they all had a few things in common. All were dirty and all were terrified and shaking. The police officer almost felt sorry for them.
"So what did you get Nick? 300? 400 bucks a head? Hope you saved it all for your lawyer. You'll need it.." Any other speech the police officer had planned to say was interrupted by the sound of an approaching car. Everyone at the scene stopped what they were doing to see a black car pull right up towards them. A well built man in a black suit slickly exited the black car. He had rusty coloured curly hair and he looked to be about in his late thirties or early forties.
"We'll take it from here." The man in black swaggered towards the police officer and immigrants, his tone showing he meant business. Nick found himself impressed by the way the man held himself, but he also felt a strange sense of deja vu. The police officer, however, seemed to be much less impressed with the mysterious man approaching his crime scene.
"Who the hell are you?" the police officer barked out. He kept his hand firmly on his gun in his pocket, feeling almost threatened by the powerful looking man.
The man in the suit rolled his eyes and answered in a gruff baritone, "INS, Division 6" Nick noticed that another man, similarly dressed in a black suit, also exited the car as his partner spoke. This man looked slightly younger than his colleague and a lot less serious. He had a youthfulness about him and he wore a cheeky grin as he leaned against the car.
The police officer frowned at approaching pair, "Division 6? I never heard of Division 6."
An eyebrow and a "Really?" was all he received in reply. This pissed the police officer a lot. Who was this man? Acting all superior. He was the law God-dammit! This man had absolutely no right to just waltz in and try to take control of his crime scene.
The man grinned over to his partner who was still standing by their car, as he approached the line of Hispanics.
"Who you got your money on B?"
"Tough call, P," The younger man actually had a slightly lower voice than the older one. The way the two addressed each other confused the police officer however. The man, "P" chuckled in response and then turned towards the group of illegal immigrants, addressing the first one.
"How ya doing there buddy?" Whatever the crowd had expected, it had certainty not been that. Not only had P spoken perfect Spanish, he had also been friendly and almost smiled at the trembling hispanic man. In return the man nervously nodded. P carried on down the line, asking questions similar to that and just asking how people were and welcoming them to the United States.
However, he paused when he got to the last person in the group. The man looked slightly different from the others. It was hardly noticeable, but there was something not quite right about him. B and P were probably the only people there to actually notice it.
"What if I break your face?" The Hispanic man laughed and nodded in reply and P grinned. Found him.
"No seriously. Besides, what the hell happened to you? When they were giving out intelligence and looks did you forget to get in line? God I would hate to see your mom." The agent was only clarifying what he already knew. As expected the Hispanic man nodded and laughed.
"You don't speak a word of Spanish." The man continued to laugh and P grinned, "We've got a winner here, huh Ben?" P said, finally using the man's proper name. A privilege that only he was allowed to take advantage of. Literally.
Ben was clutching his sides with laughter and leaning hard on the car to keep his balance. Some of the stories they were told/crappy acting skills were priceless, "Oh I know Perry, I wish I had my camera."
Smiling at the amusmant of his partner, Perry kept a hold of the last immigrant and addressed the others, "Right, you can all go. Get back in the truck and have a happy life. Welcome to the USA."
The police officer shouted indignantly, "No. Sir! Sir, you can't-"
P swiped a hand across his nose and crossed his arms. In the background Ben dramatically murmured ,"Showdown" and burst into insane giggles.
"Don't "sir" me you jackass. You have no idea in hell who you're dealing with and trust me when I say you re-he-lly don't want to piss me off." P growled and then turned to the immigrants still standing there, "Get in the truck. Now!" At his words a flurry of movement showed the immigrants all immediately obliging him, some even pausing to thank him. All the while P kept a tight hold on the 'non-Spanish speaking hispanic'.
The man tried to leave but Perry kept a tighter grip on him, "We're going to have a quite frankly fun little chat with our friend here. You ,asshole, can cry all the way back to the station. Keep on protecting us from the illegal 'aliens'" B let of another chain of giggles as the policeman stood there stunned. As P and B dragged the man down a hill and into a field Perry overheard the policeman grumbling about 'Division 6 not being real' and how 'this was bullshit.'
When they were far away enough so as not to be overheard by any stragglers, Perry turned to the man with a serious expression on his face.
"Why do you things never learn. We always keep an eye on this area. So yeah, kinda guessing you're not from around here," with that P grabbed a pen-knife from a pocket in his suit and slashed downwards at the man's chest- literally cutting him in half. B shuddered behind him as the skin fell off revealing an ugly green figure.
"I never get used to that... Oh hey Mikey," B grinned at the revealed alien. Mikey without a disguise looked nothing like a human. First off he was green, not to mention the fact that his eyes stuck out, his body reassembled a deformed large potato and he had two sets of extra arms growing out of his back.
Mikey let go of the human head on a pole he was holding and gazed sadly as it fell onto the ground. B still didn't understand all alien languages so he watched as P sternly addressed the alien.
"Gods sake, when did they go ahead and let your ugly big self out of jail Mike-ster?"
'Mikey' make a couple of camel like noises that sounded like grunts to Ben. Perry seemed to understand however.
"He says he's here for political refuge."
B shook his head and addressed the alien, "Come on dude, you know how many rules you just violated. Now Per-bear and I need to do a lot of paperwork." Perry cast a quick glare at his partner but otherwise ignored the annoying nickname.
"Put up your arms and flippers." Mikey obliged, but not without again grunting in his home tongue. All seemed to be going well. Well, that is, until Perry heard a male gasp from behind Mikey. One of Mikey's eye swivelled round to meet the shocked gaze of the policeman. The son of a idiot hadn't left when P had told him to.
"Oh Shit." P grumbled as Mikey started growling and preparing to attack the man. B brought an odd looking gun from inside his suits jacket, but was shoved harshly to the ground by Mikey as he turned to attack the terrified policeman.
"Shoot him Ben!" Perry watched in despair as Ben fumbled with his gun, he knew why and he didn't want to think about what he knew would happen due to it. A few seconds passed and Mikey charged at the police officer. He knew he had to be the one to do it so he grabbed Ben's weapon and shot at Mikey.
The alien burst into blue slime- most of which landed on the still terrified police officer. Perry sighed as the coated man stumbled towards him.
"T-t-t-hat... w-w-w-"
"Was not human. We know," P pulled some of the slime of the man's shoulder, "That's going to stain. You should have left when I told you to you absolute idiot."
The man pulled a gun from his pocket, but it shook dangerously in his hand.
"Right, calm down kiddo and I'll tell you what happened," Perry heard the sound of a van arriving in the distance. He brought out a large silver pen from his pocket. Or at least it looked like a pen, until he pressed a button and another section shot out of the top of it with an odd red screen at the top. "This is called a neuralizer. It's a gift from some friends from out of town. This red eye isolates the brain's impulses- specifically the ones for memory. So it's literally a mind fuck," He grinned up at the men group at the top of the hill, "Give me a splay burn on the perimeter guys, with holes at 40, 60 and 80 metres from right here. Thank you."
The policeman watched in horror as the men dressed similarly to B and P, but with sunglasses, used what seemed to be flame-throwers to do what they were told to. Which seemed to be setting cacti alight then putting out the fire on them. "What the hell is going on?"
"Best question you've asked all day there," Perry absently mindedly answered as he fiddled with some buttons on the 'neuralizer'. "The answer you're looking for lies right here" He pointed towards the centre of the the red section on the neuralizer.
The policeman gazed into the red dot, "Who are you, really?"
"Really," P placed on a pair of black shades that made him look actually quite cool. "I am just a figment of your imagination. What do ya think of that sunshine?" He pushed a button and the world seemed to flash for a second as the sound of a camera shutter filled the police officer's ears.
Perry whipped off the sunglasses and smirked bitterly, "Damn, what a gullible breed." He then raised his voice into a commanding tone and looked the dazed and confused police officer in the eye. "I'm serious. You're very lucky to be alive after that blast."
"What blast?"
"The underground gas main idiot. You really need to learn how to use a gun properly genius," he gestured towards the top of the hill, "Go get yourself checked by the EMS parked just over the hill there."
The man turned and walked up the hill and out of sight. Perry closed his eyes for a split second and sighed. Ben was sitting on a rock looking utterly dejected. He and B had been partners from the beginning of their life at the agency. Ben had eventually became his friend even though Perry had been a hard nut to crack. In fact they had become best friends. They had erased their names but allowed each other to use them regardless. Not just anyone could call him Perry. No one was really allowed to. At all. Literally.
"I'm sorry Perry. I just couldn't do it." Ben's voice was mono-tone. Dejected. He knew what was inevitably coming and part of him was glad.
"It happens Ben."
"You know that's not true Agent P." Perry's head snapped up to meet Ben's sad eyes at the use of his official name. "Ever since I got sick, the spirit been willing, but the rest of me... You know, I always wanted to be a photographer. I always kinda regretted not doing it. The first thing I'd do is take a picture of the stars. We never just look at them anymore. I tell you Per. I will miss you."
Perry turned to him with what seemed to be tears in his eyes, "Benj I can promise- you won't." He slipped on his sunglasses and pressed the button on the neuralizer. The world flashed and Perry sighed.
"NYPD Stop! Er.. Freeze! Please!" John Dorian added as an after-note. After all just cause you're chasing down a criminal doesn't mean you have to lose your manners. Okay unless it was a murderer. The man obviously didn't stop so Dorian groaned comically and continued chasing him.
"All yours, Dorian." John heard his over weight colleagues call. He grumbled as he ran after the criminal. Why work in a police department if you couldn't catch the criminals? What was the point? Seriously.
John was actually quite a good runner. In high school it had been the only sport he could do so the teachers allowed him to practice running during the PE periods- rather than mess up the team games. Another athletic talent he had was gymnastics and that came in use quite a lot in his job. The man ran towards a bridge- Jonathan hot on his heels.
"Freeze means stop! I said it before, just in-case you didn't catch it!" John clarified for the man, even though he was pretty sure he didn't need it. He gasped as the man climbed up onto the edge of the bridge, looking down at the traffic beneath.
"No! Wait!" John's call came to late and he watched in shocked horror as the man launched himself off the side of the bridge. He closed his eyes and winced- waiting for the knowing sound of breaking bones and death, but none came. His eyes opened and he gaped as he saw the man get to his feet and continue running down the road.
"Holy frick on a stick with a brick."
Now, Dorian was famous for being determined. After being picked on for most of his teenage life he would do most anything to prove himself. So he really didn't want to give up the chase. He watched as a open-topped bus came towards the bottom of the bridge and beamed as an idea popped into his head. As soon as the bus was close enough he leaped on it- none too gracefully.
He screamed as he plummeted into the bus and landed on top of a man. "It's raining men, hallelujah," he sang- not able to resist. The other man didn't seem to find it as funny. "Oh come on. That was a classic considering the circumstances. Next time I'll land on someone else's lap." He scrambled to his feet. He stumbled down the stairs and threw himself out of the bus and onto the road.
"See. Totally Ninja. And for my next trick.." John spotted a truck going in the same direction as the runner and ran at it- making to grab at a the back. Surprisingly he actually managed to grab it. He allowed himself a small victory dance and hoped that the driver hadn't notice. Not that it would really matter- he was the law be-atch.
The truck quickly caught up to the criminal and when Jonathan spotted him he immediately let go of the trucks side and ran at the man. Using all his strength and the momentum of jumping off a moving truck he knocked the man over. Unfortunately in doing so- he knocked himself over also. He quickly scrambled to his knees and straddled the man's waist. A small annoying part of his brain wondered just how bad this would look to passers by, but with a quick shrug he figured that it was New York- crazier stuff happens daily.
Grabbing the badge around his neck, he shoved it almost right into the man's eyes, "See this? N.Y.P.D. So in your face. Not so fast now are you Mr fast runner." The fairly average man that Dorian was sitting on looked exactly that- very average. Not exactly criminal material with his blue eyes, brown hair and stripy jumper. He was kinda cute really. Had it been any other time John might have...
"He's coming!" The man panted and somehow managed to shout.
"Yeah- well I'm going to hope he doesn't do bridge jumping cause I'll play chases with him too." John's eyes widened as the man brought out a weapon that he vaguely thought looked like a cross between a pistol and one of the head massagers- you know the type, the ones with the metal leg thingys. It made a strange beeping noises as, Jonathan assumed, the man got it prepared to shot him. Awesome gun or not- John didn't want shot by it so he clawed at the hand holding it and after a few minutes off fumbling slapped it out of the man's hands. It smashed to the ground and burst into flames.
"That was uncalled for!" John was then thrown off the man with a sudden burst of strength that seemed to come out of nowhere. The criminal got to his feet and sprinted across the road and into a large building. Dorian took longer to get to his feet but he did it and he was pleasantly surprised that he still could after punishing his body for the past few minutes. John ran across the road after the man and almost got hit by, not one, but two taxis. 'Typical,' the young police officer thought to himself, 'you never see a taxi when you need one but then two come along at once.' He got to the building where he saw the man run to and paused in puzzlement. Where the hell had he gone? John jumped and shrieked like a girl as a figure bounced up from in front of him and landed quite high on the wall of the building.
"What the..." John pointed his gun and felt his mouth drop open as he realised it was the criminal he had been chasing. What he had just done there had definitely defied the laws of both human biology and physics. Perhaps the man was Jedi?
Dorian allowed himself another few shocked glances as the man started to climb up the building in a spider-man fashion, before running to the doors of the building. Without thinking about it he took his pistol from his belt and took a shot at the door's glass windows. Normally he was a total pacifist, but he didn't feel too bad shooting at a door. The glass shattered and allowed him to get through the frame. As he was climbing through he felt the door move a bit and he realised with deep embarrassment that the door hadn't even been locked- he had just needlessly shot the glass out. Mentally giving himself a slap he ran up the thousands of stairs leading to the roof. The adrenaline had fully kicked in so he wasn't surprised that he didn't feel very tired at all. In fact he was running faster than he ever had before at that moment in time.
He reached the door to the roof, but before he had a chance to open it the door handle jiggled. The man was at the other side. He raised his gun in preparation for the door opening.
"Boo."
The man backed up towards the edge of the roof, "He's coming. He's coming because I failed and he's gonna kill me."
John snorted, "Well you don't seem to be very popular today."
The man smirked evilly and it made Dorian lower his weapon for a moment in shock, "You don't understand. Your world's going to end," and with that the man blinked and John shrieked. Not because he had a phobia of blinking or anything-how daft would that be after all- but because the man's eyes closed horizontally. A second set of eye lids appeared out of nowhere.
"What the frick are you! That was just nasty!"
The man again flashed a smirk at John and started to continue to move backwards towards the edge of the roof.
"What that ledge," the man didn't stop, "No. Seriously."
The man stood at the edge and spread his arms out. "No. Please. We can fix your eyes, I know a dynamite doctor." John pleaded with the apparently suicidal man. It was all for nought however as before John had a chance to do anything- he had gracefully dropped off the edge of the building and onto the pavement below. The only sound he heard was a thump and a shriek that sounded vaguely like a dinosaur.
TBC. Throw me a review so I can know if people want me to continue.