Monkey: This is just a one shot I came up with during finals at school... XD And I'll update the other stories I have soon so yeah... =D
*EDIT. Had to go back and fix this...there were so many mistakes! . but at least I've taken care of them! I hope...lol*
"L! That's cheating!" Light said.
"That's not cheating. It's just another way to play the game," L countered.
"My ass!"
"Hot and sexy…"
"L!"
Knock Knock
Light and L got quiet.
"Yes?" Light asked.
"Daddy?" Near said.
Light opened the door and looked at the small albino.
"Is something wrong?" the brunette asked.
"I'll say!!" Mello yelled out. He slammed the door to his and Matt's room and ran down the hall until he was next to Near. "I will say this nicely, what the hell is going on in there?! You two have been yelling for hours! We're trying to sleep here!"
Sadly, that was asking nicely for Mello.
Light looked at L but made sure the only thing the kids could see through the open door was Light and not the room.
Matt came up behind Mello. "It's two-fifteen in the morning. I know dad is an insomniac, but what can the two of you be—" His, Mello and Near's eyes widened. They looked up and down Light's body and saw he was still fully dressed. Their eyes went back to normal after a small sigh.
"Whatever you're thinking, no," Light said.
"Not yet," L corrected in a mumble.
The three pairs of eyes widened again. Light closed the door and went back into the room.
THUMP!
"Ow!"
"Knock it off!" Light said.
"You're the one that hit me," L argued.
"Because you're being an ass."
"Yeah, but you're the one who uses his a—"
THUMP!!
"Ow!" L said from the ground for the second time.
"Shut up!"
Light went and opened the door again. "Um… everything's fine. You should go back to sleep, you have school tomorrow."
"But we can't sleep with the two of you yelling so much! Can you two just fuck each other and get it over with?!" Mello yelled.
Light turned red.
"Yes, listen to our son and let me f—"
"L!!"
L smirked. "Admitting defeat?"
Light looked at his kids. "Wait one moment…" He slammed the door shut and began yelling at L who happily argued back.
"Not in front of the kids!"
"They aren't angels, what's the big deal?"
"They're children!"
"Genius children."
"Still children! They shouldn't even know anything about what we're doing!"
"Internet?"
"God! You're just so…ugh! You're so stubborn!"
"But you like me that way. And I like Light's prissy little self too."
"Oh now you're asking for it!"
"I've not only been asking, I've been wanting."
"Since when are you such a pervert?!"
"Internet."
"That's it! We're calling it off tonight!"
"You can't be serious!"
"Yes I am."
"So you're admitting defeat?"
"No!!"
Mello, Matt and Near quietly pushed open the door and looked inside. They saw their dads arguing but that was normal. What caught their attention was the state their room was in. The bed was a mess. There was a chair stuck in the wall. The floor was covered in clothes that were ripped, dirty or clean. Both computers had broken cpus and smoke was coming out of their monitors. All of the portraits and paintings in the room were smashed up or lying on the ground.
There were chess and checker boards everywhere with all the pieces scattered about. There were crumbled up and ripped papers all over the room mostly near the trash can area, each showing tic-tac-toe games with cat's eyes everywhere over the papers. It looked like a competition was going on in there…
"What could all this be for?" Matt whispered, their dads still arguing.
"It looks as if…" Mello began.
"They're competing for—" Near was cut off by the blonde.
"Which one will be seme!"
Light and L stopped arguing and looked over at the door.
"Nice one, blondie," Near said.
"Shut it you rugrat!"
"They are good," L said, since they had guessed right.
"They are going to sleep," Light said, slightly red in the face unlike L who looked as calm about things as ever. He walked over to the kids and guided them away from their room. "Come on, bed."
"So who won? You guys doing anything kinky?" Mello asked.
Light blushed even more. "No one's won and there won't be anything kinky involved."
"Aw." L complained. How he had even heard Light from the other side of the hallway was beyond him.
The brunette rolled his eyes.
"Sweet. Now I can say something true to my teachers tomorrow," Matt said, changing his voice to say, "Matt! Why are you sleeping in my classroom?!" He cleared his throat and went back to his normal voice to say, "I'm sorry! I can't help it! My parents were going at it all night and they were so loud I couldn't get any sleep!" Mello and Near laughed.
Light closed his eyes. Could his kids be any more perverted? At least Near wasn't like them.
"Daddy, does this mean that you're going to be sore tomorrow?" Near asked.
Light almost cried. Damn the internet!
The brunette took them to each of their rooms and made them all go to bed without answering Near.
"Goodnight," Light said.
"Night daddy! Hope you have some fun!" Matt and Mello said.
"Night daddy, hope you aren't too sore tomorrow," Near said.
Light left before his kids could embarrass him further. He went into his and L's room and saw L was staring at their most recent competition, a chess game.
"What?" Light asked.
L looked at him and smirked. "Checkmate."
"What?!" Light ran to the chess board and saw that because of his photographic memory, none of the pieces had been moved around since they had to temporarily stop playing. L had him in checkmate.
Out of all 169 games, thirty of which were rock, paper, scissors that got them no where, Light had finally lost.
"No way…" Light breathed out.
It couldn't be true! It couldn't!
"You know what this means…" L said, going to the closet, finding something and pulling it out.
A very short, very revealing maid's outfit.
Light's eyes widened.
"You'll have fun, my little uke." L said.
"AH!" Light backed up towards the door.
"Oh right," L said, pulling something out of what seemed to be thin air. "Let's not forget the chain. The kinkier the better."
"AAHH!!"
Light awoke screaming. He saw L in front of him.
"Are you alright?" L asked. "You fell asleep after moving a piece on the board, you must've been really tired."
"You! You were a pervert… andwehadkidsandwehadacompetition and andweweretogetherandyouwonand and therewasakinkychainandamaid'soutfit!"
L blinked. He caught the gist of it but didn't think Light could talk that fast.
Light looked down and saw they were playing chess.
"Why the hell are we playing chess?!"
"…Because we're at school during finals which we finished within the first hour of school naturally before everyone else, leaving us bored with nothing to do and you wanted to play against me," L replied. "That must've been some dream. What was it about?"
Light stared at him. "Nothing, I forgot." He lied. "But if I ever have kids, they're staying the hell away from the internet."
L kept himself from smirking. Light didn't know he had been talking in his sleep. L knew exactly what had happened in his dream.
"I call seme," L mumbled.
"What??" Light asked.
"Nothing." L moved a piece on the board. "Checkmate."
Monkey: Did I get that right? Is that how you win in chess? o.o If not and I messed up, I'm so sorry! And if I did mess up, could someone tell me how to fix it? But um yeah...hope you guys liked it. =) Ummm...so I'll see you guys later!